


Hold Your Head Up High In Disgrace

by ashtraythief



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Space, Angst, BAMF boys, Bedsharing, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Lovers, Hurt Jensen, M/M, Misha is an alien, Smuggling, meddling crew
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-11 14:44:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 46,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15317766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashtraythief/pseuds/ashtraythief
Summary: If you ask Jensen, Jared is a punk-ass little thief who’s not as irresistible as he thinks he is. If you ask Jared, Jensen is a mean, vindictive bastard, who’s definitely not as handsome as he thinks he is. But the world of intergalactic smuggling is small and Jared and Jensen keep crossing paths.Just when they’re about to admit that maybe the other isn’t so bad after all, their past rears its ugly head. When the stakes are their lives instead of the next shiny object, Jared and Jensen have to decide how far they’re willing to go to save themselves—and each other.





	1. Jensen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kimenem](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimenem/gifts).



> Written as an auction fic for the Puerto Rico Fandom Fundraiser for the lovely Kim who provided the original prompt.  
> Title from the song Strychnine by Floater (with many thanks to the lovely cleflink for suggesting it!)  
> This story would not have come together without brainstorming help from keep_waking_up and my Tangy.  
> Many, so so many thanks to dancing_adrift, who brainstormed, betad, cheerleadered me on when I thought I would never make it. You are the most beautiful rock, my dear. I would not have made it without you. More thanks also to ilikaicalie for heroic last minute beta help.  
> I also have to thank my lovely artist blondebitz for picking my story, making wonderful art for it (look at Misha, he's so adorable!) and putting up with my uncoordinated ass through it all. I’m so sorry I was such a failboat! Thanks for all your patience! Check out her masterpost [here on LJ](https://blondebitz.livejournal.com/462588.html) or [here on AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15353226)

 

  
  


 

**Jensen NOW**

 

Jensen had never thought he’d die like this—helplessly stuck in a ditch, no way out, the desert heat slowly sucking all the water, and his life, out of his body.

It was a shameful death, just being left to waste away by the enemy. A moment of inattention and the Nivonir had captured him. But they hadn’t killed him. No, the Nivonir didn’t get their hands dirty. The sun would take care of that. Then again, it was a fitting ending for his life.

Carefully he shifted to lean against the wall differently—the dull throbbing in his shoulder turned into a stabbing hot pain every time he moved—and his bare feet dragged over the rough ground. So taking off his boots maybe hadn’t been the best move but it had seemed like a good idea at the time.

Jensen sighed and closed his eyes.

His comm piece was dead, he’d lost his beacon and the walls of the ditch were blank slates of smooth beige stone. He’d tried scaling it and if he were uninjured he might have made it. But with his feet already bleeding and his shoulder thrown out at an angle he couldn’t pop back in without help, there was no way he was getting out.

His crew had no way to find him.

Jensen would die in the middle of the desert mountains, in pursuit of the next shiny object that would pay for his next aimless voyage across the galaxy. He’d been jumping from thrill to thrill, adventure to heist, almost taking pride in navigating the galaxy’s lawless spaces between planets and allied star systems. He and his crew had a reputation of getting the job done, no matter what, or who, the target was. Smuggling, stealing, it didn’t matter. The crew of the 8-15 could move anything from anywhere. And now Jensen was stuck to die on one of the very planets he’d tried to rob. He snorted. It didn’t really make a difference how he died now; he didn’t have a place among his ancestors anymore anyway.

Recently, he’d started to think it might not matter. His disgrace, the dishonor he’d brought on his family. He’d started to think that maybe, just because he was dead in his old life, maybe he could have a different one. Without honor, but a life worth living nonetheless.

It made Jensen bark out a laugh that felt like sandpaper grating in his throat. But he couldn’t help it. It was ridiculous. Everything recently just had been so ridiculous. The only reason why he’d even entertained this new life, why he’d thought he could escape his past—

Jensen stopped himself. It was no use thinking of it. Not when he was about to die alone in a ditch with no place in the afterlife for him.

Jensen closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind.

Time passed. The sun traveled across the sky. Thin slivers of light purple clouds disrupted the pale blue.

Under excruciating pain, Jensen wrestled off his jacket but he’d be damned if his corpse would be bright red from the sun. He might not have any honor but he’d go with at least a shred of dignity. He draped the jacket over his head and tried to ignore the sweat dripping down his neck and soaking through his shirt.

When the sun set, it got cold. The wind started howling through the mountains, rushing over the large slabs of stone with an eerie melody. The Nivonir called the night winds the _laments of the dead_. Down in the ditch, about to become one of them, Jensen didn’t see a reason why it couldn’t be true.

He fell asleep shivering under his jacket, too exhausted the next morning to remember his dreams except for their lingering feeling of dread.

Jensen ate his last food bar and drank his last sip of water and then he waited for the sun to rise again to burn the last of his life from his body.

 

When Jared’s head appeared over the edge of the pit, Jensen thought he’d finally started hallucinating from dehydration. There was no shortage of memories for his mind to draw on—Jared had a habit of popping up in unexpected places. Like the air vents of Jensen’s ship or the shrine of an ancient fertility object. But even though it was just an illusion, it made the now familiar mix of annoyance and anticipation curl hot in Jensen’s stomach.

Jensen’s mind cooked up a pretty realistic picture of Jared too. His brown hair was darkened with sweat, the long strands framing his face and clinging to his neck. He squinted his hazel eyes against the sun and scrunched up his nose in disdain at Jensen’s state. The mirage was completed by a casual comment that Jensen definitely did not look handsome anymore. Jensen couldn’t react with more than a weak smile and Jared’s face morphed into real concern, his brows drawn together and his mouth pursed.

Definitely a hallucination then because Jared, no matter how dire the situation they’d been in, had never once shown any concern. It was a cruel twist of his mind, Jensen thought, to show him what he’d finally allowed himself to consider, in the moments of his death.

With a thump, Jared jumped into the ditch, then he kneeled down next to Jensen and felt his forehead. “Shit, Jensen how long have you been out here?”

When Jared’s hard and calloused hand touched Jensen’s dry and peeling skin, it dawned on Jensen that Jared might actually be real.

“What’re you doin’ here?” he managed to slur out.

“Saving you, apparently,” Jared said. “Madame Berry told me you’d gone ahead but that it was a two crew job and I gotta say, she wasn’t wrong.”

“My crew—”

“Are okay. We split up to search for you because we knew the Nivonir would leave you somewhere out here to die, but let me tell you, this rock desert is a big-ass place.”

Jensen didn’t manage to answer. He heard Jared cuss and then a bottle was pressed to his lips, the cool water a balm for his desiccated mouth.

“Okay, up you go,” Jared said and pulled Jensen up. “Fuck, where are your boots?”

“Had to take them off,” Jensen muttered. “Stealth.”

“Fuck, okay. Just, let's get you out of here. If I give you a lift, can you get up the wall?”

“No.”

“That was really a rhetorical question,” Jared said, way too cheerful, and hauled Jensen to the wall where a rope was dangling. “Up you go.”

Jared gave him a boost and with shaking hands and his breath rattling painfully in his chest, Jensen managed to pull himself out of the pit with one arm, his hurt shoulder painfully dragging against the rock.

Jared followed him but Jensen was still lying face down on the ground and couldn’t move. His head was spinning and dark spots were dancing in front of his eyes. His dislocated shoulder was protesting in pain.

“Jensen, fuck, you really need to cooperate a little.”

Jared gripped his bad arm and pulled him up.

Jensen screamed.

When he regained awareness, he was sitting on the ground, and Jared was kneeling in front of him, carefully palpating his shoulder.

“Why didn't you tell me it’s dislocated?” Jared had the nerve to sound accusatory.

“Didn’t really get a chance,” Jensen rasped out.

“I’ve got to pop it back in.”

Jensen tried to focus on Jared’s big hands. “You know what you're doing?”

Jared nodded, mouth stretched into an apologetic grin. “It’s gonna hurt though.”

Wearily, Jensen closed his eyes. “Do your worst.”

There was a long moment of bright hot pain when the tense and swollen muscles around the joint refused to give. Jensen didn’t realize he was screaming until his shoulder popped back into place and the pain’s exhilarating remission made him woozy.

He inhaled deeply to regain his equilibrium and calm his frantic heartbeat. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Now come on, we need to get out of here.”

With combined force—and Jensen didn’t contribute a lot—Jared dragged him to his speeder. Jared almost lifted Jensen on top of it, then mounted the speeder behind him.

“So you don’t fall off,” Jared muttered and Jensen wasn’t sure that wouldn’t happen anyway.

When he was aware of his surroundings again, they were in a small building. Jensen felt a little better and when he opened his mouth to run his tongue over his dry lips, he realized he wasn’t dying of thirst anymore. He turned his head to the side and saw a big canteen. He reached for it and it was already half empty. Jared must have given him water while he was still out of it.

“There’s also some food.” Jared ambled into Jensen’s line of sight. “You really need to get your strength up.”

Carefully, Jensen drank. Not too much—he’d just throw it up again if he overdid it—then he took the food concentrate Jared gave him.

“Where are we?”

“Former storage post. The others will pick us up as soon as they get the ship ready.”

“How long?”

“Your mechanic said it should be fixed by morning.”

Jensen raised his eyebrows.

Jared shrugged. “Your ship’s in bad shape and the transport pod me and my crew came down with got shot up.”

“Great.”

“Hey, we weren’t the ones who charged in half-cocked,” Jared said indignantly.

Jensen closed his eyes. “We had a plan. Now shut up and let me sleep.”

Jared snorted. “No way. You've slept enough. You need to drink, eat and then help me keep an eye out because the Nivonir are still looking for us.”

With a groan, Jensen forced his eyes open. “Fine.”

Jared smiled then wrinkled his nose when Jensen sat up. “You should also clean up. You stink. Though I like the stubble.”

 

The storage shed was built against one of the many rock formations and on its side a steady stream of water trickled down the wall.

While trying to favor his arm—it didn’t hurt too badly anymore but Jensen knew it needed rest—he took off his shirt, wetted it and rubbed the dirt and sweat off his body as best as he could.

He was in no hurry to get back to Jared though. He’d been ready to die—or well, accepted he couldn’t change the situation—and now Jared, of all people, had shown up to rescue him. He didn’t know what to do with that, which was a disconcerting feeling that popped up frighteningly frequently where Jared was concerned. But brooding about it was even worse. Jensen put his dirty shirt back on, not really feeling cleaner but he thought he at least smelled a little better.

Jared was sitting next to one of the little windows, studiously looking outside.

Jensen sat down at the opposite wall so he could keep a lookout in the other direction. The silence was tense. Jensen could almost feel Jared’s curiosity.

Finally, he sighed. “Ask.”

Jared’s head whipped around. “What?”

“You want to ask,” Jensen said. “So ask.”

Jared wet his lips, then looked back out the window. “You have a lot of scars,” he said. “Even for a smuggler.”

“It’s a dangerous business,” Jensen said.

Jared looked back at him, lips pursed. “Yeah but most of the dangerous people we encounter don’t have swords or other blades.”

“Oh, you know something about swords?”

Jared looked back out the window. “Not particularly. But every idiot can tell a gunshot wound from something that was cut.”

Before Jensen had a chance to reply, a sound turned his head. It was a distant thumping, slightly chopped and offset. It was the sound of many feet walking in almost complete synchrony.

“What?” Jared asked.

Jensen pulled himself closer to the window. In the distance, he could see the dust rise.

“They’re coming.”

“Fuck.” Jared took out his beacon and pressed the button.

“Don’t they know where we are?” Jensen asked.

Jared made a face. “Yeah but they’re too far away to talk to and this is the only way I can impress on them the urgency.”

Jensen snorted. “I’m pretty sure they know. But it doesn’t matter. If they don’t show up within the next ten minutes, we’re done.”

“Maybe it’s time to get out of here,” Jared said. “If we take the speeder—”

“We can’t outfly them,” Jensen said, watching the approaching army. “They have riders.”

Jared cursed. The Nivonir had tamed the Ranikas, the thin, two-legged animals of their planet that ran so fast, they were occasionally smuggled off planet for racing. Jensen and his crew had taken a job just like that a few years ago, so he hadn’t been too hesitant to accept the job that had gotten him into his current mess, stealing an amulet from Nivonir’s sacred shrine. Unfortunately, the Nivonir had a much tighter security when it came to their treasured objects.

“So what do you suggest?” Jared asked tersely.

“Pray that Felicia gets the engine fixed on time.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? You want to keep sitting here like live targets?”

Jensen didn’t have the energy to get angry so he just raised his hand to encompass their surroundings in a weak wave. “Anywhere out there, we’re easy targets and completely unprotected. But the Nivonir don’t believe in close combat. They either set a trap or attack from a distance. If we can hold out in here long enough, our people have a shot at getting us out.”

Jared’s face was still disbelieving.

“Look, I know not doing anything sucks, but right now it’s the best strategy.”

Jared seemed to consider then nodded. “Okay. I believe you.”

Jensen raised his eyebrows.

Jared gave him a crooked smile. “You know what you’re doing. You’ve got a lot of scars.”

“Doesn’t that suggest otherwise?”

Jared shook his head. “A lot of shit left marks on your body—that you survived.”

Jensen didn’t answer. He’d had this debate with Dani often enough—badges of honor, she called his scars, makes you sexy, she’d said with a wink—but Jensen knew the truth. They weren’t signs of strength; they were signs of momentary weakness.

_Scars are the dishonor we can’t hide._

“Just stay sharp,” Jensen said. “They’re preparing their weapons.”

First came the boulder. It sailed through the air, almost slowly, majestically.

“Shit,” Jared said.

He grabbed Jensen’s wrist and dragged him out the back of the shed. The boulder hit and the left side of the shed splintered into a thousand tiny pieces. Planks from the walls, pieces of shelves, everything exploded into a mess of flying wood.

In the chaos and the noise, Jensen focused on his heartbeat, a loud, rhythmic drumming to ground and focus him. They were under attack and he needed to protect Jared.

Jensen threw Jared against the rock behind the right part of the shed and pressed himself against his back. A few pieces struck his back, one painfully hitting his injured shoulder but all in all, it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.

“Fuck.” Jared sounded a little winded.

Jensen stepped back and turned around to face whatever was coming for them next.

“Since when do they throw rocks?” Jared sounded indignant, of all things. “We can’t survive this, we need to get out of here.”

Jensen watched the Nivonir line up. They were too far away for him to make out the details but Jensen knew what an archer formation looked like.

“No, we need cover,” he said and started hunting for big slabs of wood.

Jared muttered out another “fuck” but followed his lead, thankfully without question.

Jensen gathered a few larger pieces and propped them up against the remaining wall, forming a makeshift wooden shelter, and not a moment too soon.

The arrows flew across the sky like a dark blanket.

Jensen pulled Jared under the wooden planks and they crouched huddled together while the arrows slammed into the wood with violent force.

After the first volley, another hit, and then another. There was nowhere to run. On the vast steppe, they’d be easy targets, same if they ran across the boulders.

Jensen crouched in the dirt, felt Jared breathe and shift next to him, their shoulders bumping and their arms rubbing against each other. On autopilot, Jensen’s brain ran through all possible scenarios, considering and disregarding the maneuvers he’d learned during his training. It came as easy as if it had been yesterday.

The arrows kept hitting their shelter and it wasn’t long until the pointed tips penetrated the wood. They wouldn't be safe for much longer.

Jensen turned to look up at the rocky wall behind them. The stones were ragged enough to provide the occasional cover and up on the hill he saw part of an old ship which looked like a Rinkon warbird. It would give more shelter than parts of a demolished storage shed. Jensen would never make it up there but Jared could. If Jensen could come up with a diversion…

“What’s in your backpack?”

Jared turned to him. “What?”

“Do you have any weapons? Guns, grenades, anything?” Jensen asked frantically.

“Yeah, but Jensen one gun against an army…”

“We’re not gonna defeat them, we just need a diversion.”

Jared’s eyes widened. “You have a plan.”

“Yes.” Jensen gestured impatiently. “Now show me what you got.”

Jared reached for his backpack and just upended it, emptying its contents on the ground.

There was a rope, some tape, water, food, a bunch of other crap they had no use for and a shotgun with regular shells, and two flares.

Jensen took the shotgun shells, opened them up and then cut open the flares.

“What are you doing?”

Jensen’s hands moved quickly, efficiently. His shoulder twinged painfully, but he ignored it. He distributed the flare’s powder evenly into the shells.

“It’s not going to do a lot of damage, but it’s gonna to look impressive,” he said.

“And then?”

“Then you climb the rocks,” Jensen said, never taking his eyes of the shells. He couldn’t spill anything.

“There’s some shelter and if this works, the Nivonir will be so baffled they’ll stop shooting long enough to figure out what’s going on.”

“You think the old ship up there still has some juice?” Jared asked.

“It looks like a Rinkon war ship so probably not. But it’ll give you enough cover to hide until the crew shows up or if they can’t make it, you can get out of here.”

“Me?” Jared asked, his voice tense.

Jensen screwed the shells shut again. “Yes, you.”

There was no answer and when he finally looked up, Jared was glaring at him.

“I’m not leaving you behind.”

“Yes, you are,” Jensen said calmly and started loading the shotgun. “I can’t move, can’t run. Even if I had boots, I wouldn't make it far and you know it.”

Jared opened his mouth in protest.

“Jared, I appreciate it, I do, but I made my peace with dying. And you have a shot. So fucking go.”

Jared pressed his lips together. “No.”

“What do you mean, no?”

Jared gave him a crooked grin. “You once asked me if I get everything that I want. The answer is still yes.”

Jensen remembered their conversation on Rallah’s planet and he wanted to shake him.

“I’ll go up there but I’ll get whatever is in that ship to hold them off. Maybe I can even get it to start, make it fly into the Nivonir.”

“No,” Jensen hissed. “Jared, don’t be ridiculous.”

“Your face is ridiculous,” Jared said and leaned over to kiss Jensen quick and hard. Then he gripped a smaller piece of wood, holding it to shield his back and ran towards the rocks.

Stunned, Jensen sat under their shelter and watched as Jared left, once again leaving him reeling after a kiss. Just like the first time they’d met. Really, this whole thing between them had been ridiculous from the start.

  
  
  


**Jared + Jensen THEN**  


“Hey, bartender!”

Jensen looked around the bar inconspicuously while Dani shouted their drink orders at the pale gray, eight-armed cephaloid behind the bar.

They were in a dump—a dimly lit, low-ceiling maze of winding corridors stuffed with mismatched furniture for creatures of all shapes and sizes to sit on. Jensen was standing in one of the hallways, keeping away from the few spotlights because even in a place like this it wasn’t wise to draw attention to a scratched up cheek.

The wound was throbbing hotly and probably still glowing green. It would fade in a few days but he didn’t want people asking why he’d gotten in a fight with a Hacca. Haccas were known for two things: sharp claws and infinite greed. You could count on finding the most precious treasure in their heaps of junk but not many smugglers tried to liberate their possessions from them. Jensen usually wouldn’t either but this time he’d gotten an offer he couldn’t refuse.

Still, if he wanted to keep his bag of Yorrin yarn, he’d lay low and let the rest of his crew get the refreshments. He patted the inside of his jacket to make sure the bag was still in the hidden pocket—just a tiny fraction of this stuff was worth enough shims to fuel his ship for three turns—and waited for his drink.

Someone bumped into him from behind and Jensen spun around, one hand on his gun when he looked up into a pretty face with wide, innocent hazel eyes.

The guy who’d stumbled into him was slightly out of breath, broad chest heaving and cheeks a lovely shade of pink.

“Oh.” His mouth fell open and his slightly slanted eyes roamed over Jensen’s face. “Sorry, I hope I didn’t make it worse.”

Jensen wanted to brush him off with a casual comment but was frozen when the guy—kid really, he couldn’t be older than early twenties—reached out and gently brushed a finger along Jensen’s cheek, just on the edge of the burning wound.

Jensen cleared his throat, taken aback by the casual and bold touch. “It’s not bad.”

The kid nodded seriously, then suddenly smiled, dimples popping in both cheeks and his tongue peeking out to wrap around his canine tooth.

“Good.” Then he walked past Jensen. Even though he was a head taller than most people in here—had at least a couple of inches on Jensen too—he disappeared in the crowd after just a few steps.

What the fuck.

“Second-grade shine, as ordered.”

Dani’s voice brought Jensen back to the present and he took his drink from her hands. They walked back to one of the more secluded nooks and Dani handed the other drinks she was carrying to the rest of Jensen’s crew.

Jensen sat down with his people, and for the next two hours he forgot all about about the tall, dimpled guy while they compared their versions of the last job and celebrated their success.

Everybody had their own part during the job, Dani on the ship, overseeing the tech aspect, Chris setting off flash and smoke grenades everywhere as a diversion, Felicia finding the hidden entrance behind the treasure cove, and Misha keeping lookout with his nine senses, more numerous and much sharper than any human’s, while Jensen had been inside the maze of tunnels, tracking down their loot. They all had their own story to tell and Jensen was glad that he wasn’t the only one who’d gotten hurt; Chris had a nasty gash on his arm where one of the Haccas had gotten a shot in. There was no shame here in getting injured but Jensen still didn’t like looking at his scars. He tried to see them as honorable battles scars, as Dani had tried to teach him, but old habits died hard.

But in the end, it didn’t matter. Jensen had the Yorrin yarn and as soon as he dropped it off at Mark’s, they’d be a thousand shims richer. And that was the only thing that mattered now.

So they talked and laughed, drank and ate, and celebrated their success.

 

When Jensen made his way out back to use the cliff that served as a restroom there, right after Dani made an off-hand comment about trying to get laid, Jensen couldn’t help but look for the guy who had bumped into him earlier. There had been something about him, the way his eyes had glinted with mirth. A little inviting, a little challenging. He’d looked like a good distraction, which was exactly what Jensen was looking for.

He didn’t see him, not until he was done with his business and just stepped back inside. The kid was leaning against a wall near the door, hip jutting out, his gray pants barely held up by a smooth black belt and his dark shirt ridden up so far that Jensen almost got to see some skin. And fuck, he wanted to.

He walked up to the kid, now with his wits about him.

“So,” he said, when they were face to face and he had the guy’s attention, “I know you said you don’t want to make it worse but I was wondering if you were interested in making it better?”

The kid’s eyebrows shot up and his wide mouth twisted in amusement. “Right to the point, aren’t you?”

Jensen shrugged his shoulders and shot him a hopefully winning smile. “Why waste time? Besides, you never know when the next bar brawl breaks out and we have to clear out.”

“Good point.” The guy tilted his head, then his tongue darted out to wet his lips. “You got a room here?”

Jensen shook his head. “There’s pretty dense vegetation outside.”

The kid wrinkled his nose. It was unbearably cute. “Half the plants on this shitstain of a planet are poisonous. I’m sorry, handsome, but either you’ve got a bed or I’m gonna look for someone who does.”

Jensen pulled a face. He didn’t have a room; they always slept on the ship and no matter how cute the guy was, Jensen wasn’t bringing a stranger on their ship.

“Sorry, no can do.”

“Too bad,” the guy said and leaned in.

“I thought no bed was a deal breaker,” Jensen muttered when the guy kissed him.

Warm lips pressed against his and then the kid’s tongue flicked out again, this time against Jensen’s lips. Jensen reached up, got his hands into the soft strands of the kid’s hair and pulled him in for a proper kiss.

It was hot and insistent, probably the best kiss Jensen had had in a long time and he got lost in it—in the kid’s taste, his fresh scent and clean clothes, something Jensen really missed. The heat of the kid’s long body pressed against Jensen, his interest obvious against Jensen’s stomach while his hands were running over Jensen’s chest and then gripping his shoulders tight.

“Changed your mind about the vegetation?” Jensen asked.

The guy drew back and shook his head. “No. But I wanted to say goodbye properly.” He leaned in again, pressed a soft kiss to Jensen’s mouth half-open in surprised protest, and then turned around and walked away, once again disappearing into the crowd.

What the fuck?

Jensen walked outside again, needing a breather and a minute to calm down. Under the bright starry sky, he longingly looked at the dense vegetation ringing the bar. They could have had so much fun out there.

Regretfully, he shook his head, patted his jacket down to check for the bag again and had already taken a step towards the bar when he realized the hidden pocket in his jacket was empty.

Frantically, he tore off his jacket and turned it inside out, finding the lining of the pocket torn and the bag with the Yorrin yarn gone.

How in the stars… The kid lounging around insouciantly in Jensen’s line of sight. The kiss. His hands wandering across Jensen’s chest. Jensen hadn’t even felt a hand under his jacket. That little shit.

“Fuck.”

 

 

**Jensen NOW**

 

So they hadn’t really gotten along at first. Technically, they still didn’t. Which was why Jensen didn’t understand why Jared was so persistent in trying to get him out of here.

_Perseverance is key._

Well then.

The arrows kept coming and the wood kept splintering. Jensen raised the gun and drove it through a hole in the wood. Then he pulled the trigger.

The shell sailed through the air, hit the line of Nivonir without much impact and then, just a breath later, exploded in a giant cloud of bright red sparks.

The Nivonir started whistling in panic and Jensen looked up to see Jared peeking out behind a boulder.

“Go!” Jensen yelled. “Get the fuck out of here, I mean it.”

Jared just raised his arm and showed him his middle finger. Then he started to climb. Great. The little punk would finally get himself killed.

Jensen took a deep breath and turned back to the Nivonir. They’d overcome the initial confusion and were raising their bows again. Jensen shot the next bullet at a different part of the line.

He wished it was still like in the beginning, when they hadn’t cared about each other and when neither of them had had any qualms of leaving the other behind.

 

**Jared + Jensen THEN**

“There’s already someone down there,” Dani announced when they’d entered the planet’s atmosphere.

Jensen leaned over her shoulder to read the 8-15’s instruments. “Who?”

She honed in and ran the scans. “Small spacecraft, a maximum of eight crew I’d say.”

Chris muttered a bunch of expletives under his breath and agitatedly dragged a hand through his long hair. “Seems like Rich is a fucking liar and not the only one who knew about this.”

Jensen surveyed the scene. “Yeah well, he always talked a big game. Dani, take us down over there.” He pointed at a patch of dense vegetation on the other side of the coordinates Rich had given them. “We’re gonna scout from the high ridge up here and then go after it.”

Dani turned to him. “What if this other crew has what we want?”

Jensen pulled his gun from his thigh holster and waved it in Dani’s face. “I’m not carrying this around because it looks good.”

Felicia chose that moment to poke her head in, her short red hair mussed in all directions and liberally coated in engine grease. “Oh, it’s time to break out the toys? Awesome!”

Now it was Dani’s turn to mutter under her breath about trigger happy morons while Chris grinned. “I like the way you think, Jensen.”

Jensen grinned back at him and then turned around to Felicia. “Get ready.”

Dani landed the 8-15 in stealth mode between the twenty-foot high blades of grass, shimmering in a subdued mix of blue and grey. Perfect cover for the 8-15’s grey hull.

Quietly, Jensen and his people made their way to the edge of the ridge and surveyed the scene below them. It was another crew, huddled around a tablet, occasionally looking up and pointing towards the mountains.

“They haven’t gone after it yet,” Chris said.

“How do we make sure we beat them to it?” Dani asked.

Jensen grinned and waved Felicia over. “We give them more pressing matters to attend to.”

Behind them, thick dark smoke was billowing towards the sky. They could hear angry yelling and the frantic clanging of people trying to stop lasting damage to a ship's primary engine.

Chris looked skeptically over his shoulder. “You sure they can repair that?”

Felicia snorted. “If they can’t fix that, they don’t deserve to fly a spaceship.”

“Don’t forget that not every mechanic is the genius you are.” Jensen adjusted his backpack. “Now, let’s go before they figure out someone messed with them. We can’t let another score slip through our fingers.”

“ _Your_ fingers, you mean,” Chris muttered.

Jensen shot him an angry glare. “One time, I got played. One time!”

Chris just gave him an unimpressed look.

“You wouldn’t have been immune against that face either,” Jensen bit out.

“I'll believe it when I see it,” Chris snorted.

Misha chirped and the four ears on the right side of his head circled.

“We _are_ hurrying,” Jensen shot back but picked up his pace nevertheless.

Felicia had no trouble blasting the old entrance to the mountain’s sanctuary open. Misha waddled to the edge on his short jointless legs, ears all pointing forward and down into the dark abyss.

Jensen and the others waited patiently while Misha scanned the dark interior of the mountain. His senses worked better than most fancy tech. His ears and three eyes catalogued everything from heat signature to toxic radiation.

Finally, he turned around and winked at Jensen with his two front ears.

“How deep?” Jensen asked.

Misha waggled his ears again.

“That’s not too bad,” Chris said and threw a glow stick down the chasm. Like Misha had said, it was only about forty feet deep.

They rappelled down, Misha’s ears and his long blue fur merrily flopping in the air current until they hit the floor. Down here, Misha took the lead. He’d already honed in on the target and was finding them the best way between the stony pillars and rocks rising from the craggy floor.

“Those look like boobs,” Felicia whispered.

“Everything looks like boobs to you,” Chris whispered back.

Misha chirped, three of his ears flicking downwards.

“Ew,” Jensen said. “Misha, that’s gross.”

Felicia’s “How do you know that?” clashed with Chris’ “Great, I’ll never be able to unsee that.”

Jensen laughed; Misha’s fur fluttered in his silent laughter and they bumped their knuckles together.

They squeezed through two rock formations that looked like a row of crooked teeth and a licking tongue. Then they stood in front of the final resting place of an ancient priest who had led a people that no longer lived. Jensen didn't particularly care about that; what he did care about were the shims he was going to get for retrieving the priest’s staff that was said to have all kinds of powers.

“You think it’ll work?” Chris asked.

“Only one way to find out.” Before Jensen could do anything, they heard noises. The other group had caught up with them.

“Hide,” Jensen hissed and they all dove off in different directions to hide behind the various rock structures.

There were only four of them and Misha wasn’t really a fighter, while the other team might be as many as eight people. Besides, setting up a proper ambush was always better than just standing there and waiting for their rivals to show up.

Four humanoids appeared, two short and two tall, and the tallest one Jensen actually recognized.

“You little shit,” he muttered under his breath. It was the same guy who’d stolen the Yorrin yarn from him.

Chris was hiding behind a pillar in Jensen’s line of sight and raised an eyebrow inquisitively.

Jensen nodded aggressively towards the guy and Chris inclined his head, clearly admitting he’d have lost the loot too.

“So,” the kid said, “no boobytraps?”

The short brunette next to him shook her head but her expression was doubtful. “Seb said it was a simple smash and grab. But since the door was already blasted and it’s still here…”

The other tall guy, a man whose dark skin was covered with the shimmering white lines that Jensen recognized as native to the desert systems at the edge of the galaxy, raised his rifle.

“Gen is right, Jared,” he said. “Something’s not right.”

Finally, a name to go with Jensen’s new nemesis.

“See? Aldis agrees with me,” Gen said.

Jared just cocked his head and carefully approached the sarcophagus. It was cut from a light green stone, almost translucent and they could see the shape of the priest’s corpse inside.

“Well, we won’t find out if we don’t open it,” Jared said.

Gen rolled her eyes and so did Aldis but the fourth of their merry little band of thieves stepped forward. He was short, with his dark hair almost covering half of his face, but the visible part of his mouth was smiling. “I’m with Jared. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Jared pointed a finger at him. “Osric, don’t jinx it. Everybody, look sharp.”

Gen and Aldis drew their weapons and then Jared and Osric went to open the sarcophagus.

Oh, they were in for one hell of a surprise.

Jensen looked over to Felicia who was already gripping the hose that connected to her backpack. Jensen reached for his own backpack and took the hose out, pressing his thumb on the big button on top.

Jensen peered around his hiding pillar just as Jared and Osric managed to pry the lid off the sarcophagus. It fell to the ground with a dull, resounding thud.

Jared and Osric jumped back but they wouldn’t have needed to worry. Nothing happened. Shit. Jensen had counted on the booby trap to do his dirty work work for them.

He sent Chris an exasperated look, but Chris missed it because he was already drawing his gun. This would get unpleasant.

Jensen reached for his own gun, as Jared and his group surrounded the sarcophagus.

“There it is,” Osric said with a gleeful smile.

“It’s smaller than I expected,” Aldis said.

Jensen bit his lip so as not to make the obvious joke when Jared grinned and said, “that’s what she said.”

Aldis managed to shoot Jared a glare while rolling his eyes at the same time.

“You're an actual child,” Gen said but it didn’t sound like she was making that particular comment for the first time.

Jared flashed her a bright dimpled grin—the one that had cost Jensen the Yorrin yarn and while he was still mad he couldn’t help being enchanted—and then he reached inside.

Jensen signaled his people to get ready.

Jared pulled out the staff, about as long as his arm and cut from dark wood, the stone at the top in the same pale green color as the sarcophagus.

“Well, that was easy,” he said.

Jensen pointed his gun at him.

Then something exploded out of the sarcophagus, too fast for Jensen to register anything but pale limbs. He reholstered his gun and pointed the hose at the mass of emerging vines that had picked up Jared and his crew. They were yelling and trying to fight their way out—Jared even managed to get a few shots off before the vines immobilized his arms—but then the vines surrounded their bodies completely.

“Well, that’s a sight for sore eyes,” Jensen said and stepped out from behind the pillar.

Four heads whipped around to stare at him.

Jared’s eyes widened, then he gave Jensen his most charming smile. “Look at that. Come to save me? This time I definitely know a quiet place for later.”

Jensen laughed. “I don’t think so. You took something from me.”

“Your heart?” Jared asked looking innocent.

“Oh my stars, Jared could you maybe not flirt while we’re getting squished to death?” Gen asked, sounding slightly winded.

“Yeah, you think you could help with that?” Jared asked. “It is getting a bit hard to breathe.”

“Sure,” Jensen said amicably and pointed the hose at Jared. He and Felicia sprayed the plants with the liquid Felicia had cooked up and it froze the vines in place.

Jared tried to wiggle out but the vines were unmovable.

“A little help here?”

Jensen stepped forward but he stopped when he reached the staff Jared had dropped.

“I think you look pretty good where you are.”

“Oh come on, you can’t leave us here,” Jared protested.

Jensen grinned and raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, so I admit, taking the Yorrin yarn from you wasn’t the nicest thing to do—”

“Shit, that was him?” Osric said.

“—but leaving me here to die would be a very harsh punishment, don’t you think?”

“Well, you did scam me out of a pretty big payday and my reputation took an unpleasant hit.”

“We’ll pay you back,” Gen said, “Look, Jared can be a pain in the ass but that’s no reason to kill us. Or him.”

“Thanks, Gen.”

“Anytime.”

Jensen walked up to Jared, who was completely wrapped in a vine cocoon. “I don’t know. I kinda like seeing you tied up.”

Jared licked his lips. “Yeah? Imagine how that could go when we’re not stuck down here.”

Jensen reached the cocoon. “Tempting.”

Jared grinned. “I have many faults but I always apologize if I do people wrong.”

Jensen leaned forward. “Yeah?” He was so close he could see the mix of colors swirling in Jared’s slanted eyes.

Jared nodded. “Thoroughly.” He tilted his head and Jensen felt his breath ghost across his face. Stars, he was good.

Abruptly, Jensen pulled back. “Yeah, I think I prefer you like this.”

Instantly, Jared’s face changed to furious outrage. “Are you fucking kidding me? That’s not funny!”

Jensen laughed in his face. “Sorry, Jared. But this round, you lose.”

Jensen held up the staff and started walking backwards.

“You can’t leave us here!”

“Watch me!”

Jensen waved with the staff, then he signaled his people to go.

“Wait! You can’t—you fucking bastard, you can’t let my friends die!”

Jensen turned around when he reached the entrance of the chamber. “Don’t worry, the petrification will dissolve in a few hours. Until then you should think about how it’s not nice to steal from handsome strangers!”

“You’re not that handsome!” Jared yelled after him.

Felicia and Chris snickered.

Jensen rolled his eyes. “Let’s go before they get out of there and come after us.”

“Dani will be so mad she missed this,” Felicia said, still laughing.

 

They trekked back to their ship and Felicia was right—Dani demanded a play-by-play. When they took off, someone on Jared’s damaged ship fired at them, the communications with the remainder of his crew apparently re-established. Well, it was a good thing they were leaving. Dani managed to get them out of reach without taking a hit and Jensen opened a bottle of the good liquor.

They’d finished a well-paying job without anyone getting hurt and he’d finally learned his mystery thief’s name and gotten revenge. He had a feeling that he hadn’t seen the last of Jared yet but the annoyance that caused was accompanied by a healthy dose of anticipation. Jensen poured himself another glass and told himself that it was probably time to get laid again.

 

 

**Jensen NOW**

 

Jensen was on his last bullet but Jared wasn’t up the mountain yet. So he waited, crouched low behind the wood and watched the mountainside to see if Jared was still undiscovered. There was a stretch at the top where he’d be exposed but maybe the Nivonir wouldn’t see—

Of course they did. Jensen aimed one last time and shot the last bullet right in the middle of the line. Another bout of confusion and Jared swung himself over the edge and disappeared from Jensen’s vision.

Jensen let himself sink further to the ground and rolled himself up to make as small a target for the enemy as he could.

He hoped, against all odds, that Jared would just leave before he’d get himself killed. There was a point where even Jared’s luck would run out.

From above, Jensen heard the sound of creaking metal, then the whirring sound of a turbine starting. Shit.

The rock wall started shaking, then the Rinkon warbird shot from its perch, straight towards the Nivonir. Whistling in alarm, they scattered and the Rinkon ship careened towards their line until it crashed into the ground, stirring up a giant cloud of dust that flew outwards in all directions, burying the Nivonir under it.

Jensen turned away and pulled his jacket over his face and then a wall of sand hit his shelter and threw him to the ground, a barrage of grains pelting against his skin.

When it was over he coughed the dust out of his lungs and rubbed his dry eyes. Then Jared was there again because the stupid fucker had actually come back for him.

“Just let yourself be rescued gracefully,” Jared said, then gave Jensen a resigned once over. “I’ll take grateful too.”

Then Jared swung Jensen over his shoulder and reached for a rope. Apparently he’d gone hunting around in the ship before he’d steered it towards the Nivonir. The two of them were being hauled to the top of the cliff by a windlass wedged between two giant boulders where the Rinkon war ship had rested only moments before. Jensen worried the Nivonir could still see and shoot at them, when suddenly behind them an explosion shook the rocks. Jensen craned his head around to see the rest of the Rinkon ship go up in flames.

Before Jensen lost consciousness again, he thought that the explosion was not quite as dramatic as when Jared had blown up Jensen’s ship, but it would do.

 

 

 

**Jared + Jensen THEN**

Jensen really hated being held at gunpoint. Especially when he was being robbed. But it was a calculated risk when he had to pass through the Cortarola Belt. The Cortarola planets were rich with metals and minerals but their people, a humanoid-looking, one-eyed, leather-skinned race, inherently distrusted outsiders and weren’t keen on trade. So most people stole and smuggled. Fortunately, the Cortarola abided by a strict honor code whereby they had to accept apologies. Cortarola lost all honor when they apologized but most other races didn’t have these qualms so stealing from them usually went without punishment.

“Look, I, on behalf of myself and my crew, apologize sincerely for taking these barrels of green gold. We deeply regret stealing from you and plead for your mercy.”

The leader of the Cortarola police sniffed through his broad nose, his fangs clicking as he opened and closed his mouth.

“We accept your apology, weakling,” he finally said. “Your ancestors will punish you for your dishonor.”

 _Today, you brought dishonor on our house_.

Jenzen froze, the old words ringing loudly in his ears.

_You have no place among our ancestors._

Jensen balled his hands into fists, forced himself to focus on the Cortarola. “We grovel before you in gratitude.”

The Cortarola nodded, clearly satisfied and then motioned his group to carry the barrels off his ship.

Jensen waited them out and when they’d disembarked with a final warning never to steal from them again, he turned to the rest of the crew. “The stones are safe?”

Chris nodded. “No worries, they only found the barrels with green gold.”

The Cortarola were very protective of their resources and had an excellent net for detecting foreign vessels but they weren’t too smart. The trick was to steal two things and let them confiscate the less valuable one.

Jensen had still hoped they’d get away clean —after all he was one of the few who had managed before—but somehow they’d detected him. He still wasn’t sure how. But something about this job had stunk from the start.

“I’m gonna go check.”

Chris gave him a confused look. “Why?”

“I don’t know. But something is off.”

He looked over to Misha, who was fast asleep. Leading them to the Cortarola treasures had taken a lot out of him, and he was curled up in a blue fuzzy ball, vibrating with every breath in his sleep. It would be no use asking him now.

Jensen went down to the engine room and lifted one of the panels leading to the false floor. He jumped down, crawling among the tiny bags filled with the rare Cortarola jewels when he saw someone move ahead of him at the end of the slim corridor.

“Motherfucker.”

“Shit.”

Whoever it was started crawling away from him. Jensen followed until the thief disappeared through a hole in the floor, right above their second storage room that also had a tiny space access hatch. On, fuck no.

He furiously crawled towards the hole and jumped down and looked up, straight into the barrel of a gun.

“You know,” Jared said conversionally, “you look really good at the other end of a gun.”

“I like it better when I’m the one pointing the gun,” Jensen said and he was both awed and furious that the fucking kid was stealing from him. _Again_.

Jared grinned. “I bet you do.”

“You won’t get away with flirting this time,” Jensen said, slowly walking sideways, to a panel of the ship’s comm system.

Jared pointed the gun at the intercom, disabled it with one shot and then pointed it back towards Jensen. “Since I have a gun, I don’t have to. And I will shoot you.”

Placatingly, Jensen raised his hands while he debated whether he could charge at Jared before he’d get shot.

“You sold me out to the Cortarola, didn’t you?” he said and inched forward.

Jared shrugged. “You left me stuck in stone in an ancient priest’s burial chamber and you blew up my ship.”

“I disabled your engine. And you stole from me.”

“Well, then we’re even now.”

Jensen glared. “I won’t forget this.”

Jared grinned. “You’re right about that.”

Then he pulled a detonator out of his pants.

“NO!” Jensen charged forward but Jared pressed the button and the blast shook the ship and threw Jensen off his feet.

He was dizzy for a moment and when his vision cleared, Jared was leaning over him, long strands of his hair falling into his face.

“Jared, come on!” someone yelled in the background.

“You’re gonna pay for that,” Jensen slurred and raised his arm. He wanted to punch Jared but somehow he ended up with a fistful of his soft, brown hair.

“Wouldn’t be the worst thing,” Jared muttered.

Jensen thought he was coming closer, his impossible eyes getting bigger but then he heard shouts—Chris and Felicia—and heavy steps coming towards them.

“Until next time.”

And then Jared was gone and Jensen was left still slightly dizzy but also disturbingly aroused on the floor of his own ship.

What the fuck?

 

 

**Jensen - NOW**

 

Jensen came to again when Jared splashed water onto his face.

“Get up. You’re a little too heavy for me to carry the whole way.”

With a groan Jensen forced himself up with his good arm. He looked around to orient himself and realized that Jared had brought them a good distance away from the edge of the boulder mountain.

“They don’t seem to be coming after us for now, but we can’t be too careful.”

Jensen nodded and with Jared’s help stood upright. The soles of his feet were sore and his left foot was definitely bleeding but it wasn’t as bad as he’d feared.

“The moment we catch wind of them, I’m plopping my ass down and you’re running.”

Jared rolled his eyes. “Sure, Jensen, whatever you say.” Then he pulled Jensen’s good arm across his shoulder and gripped him around the waist. “Now come on, old man. We need to get out of here.”

“You’re a punk-ass little shit, you know that?” Jensen asked conversationally and then focused on the ground so he’d avoid stepping on the sharper stones.

“You make it sound like an insult when it’s really not,” Jared said and Jensen could practically hear the grin in his voice. Unfortunately, walking took up too much of his concentration for him to come up with a witty retort.

He lost track of how long they walked. He forced himself to keep walking, to automate his movements and ignore the pain in his feet.

At some point, Jared’s comm piece started crackling with static. Then a tinny voice broke the silence.

“Jared? Can you hear me?”

“Thank fuck,” Jared muttered.

Jensen leaned heavily against him when they stopped and listened to Jared tell his pilot Chad to hurry the fuck up because Jensen was more dead than alive at this point.

Jensen thought he was doing reasonably well, all things considered but he didn’t have the energy to argue.

Roughly, Jared lowered him to the ground.

“Okay, they’re gonna be here any second and then we’re gonna get out of here. You still with me, Jensen?”

“Unfortunately,” Jensen said.

“Ungrateful bastard.”

Jensen had to laugh at that, though it hurt his whole body. Then they sat in silence until the whooshing of the turbine signalled the 8-15’s arrival.

They landed close by and then Chris and Dani were there, fussing over Jensen and dragging him towards the ship.

Considering all the times they’d been saved by their crews after a job went a little awry, Jensen thought they probably deserved some kind of reward.

   
  
  
  
**Jared + Jensen THEN**

“You know, I want to get him too, but this is not healthy.”

Dani peered down at the papers with a disapproving frown. It was Jensen’s combined research on Jared and his crew, all the info he’d gotten from his contacts in the galaxy’s underworld.

“He stole from us. _Twice_.”

Placating, Dani raised her hands. “I’m not saying we shouldn’t be on the lookout, but I don’t think that this is quite necessary.”

Chris came into the common room and plopped down in a chair next to Jensen. “Dani’s right. Besides, the kid seems to have a thing for you, maybe he’s gonna find us.”

Dani pointed a finger at Chris. “The man’s got a point.”

“There is no thing,” Jensen said, unreasonably irritated. “He’s just a punk-ass little thief who thinks he gets by with a cute smile.”

That got him two identical sets of surprised eyebrow raises.

Misha, who so far had been a quiet buzzing ball in the corner, unrolled himself, rotated his back ears and chirped.

“I did not say—” Jensen started.

“You definitely did,” Chris said gleefully.

Misha chirped and warbled.

Jensen slapped his hand on the table. “I will not let— “

“I better secure our cargo,” Chris said and, with a laugh, left the room.

Jensen pointed a finger at Misha. “Traitor.”

MIsha chirped again, his ears straightening outwards.

“Asshole,” Jensen muttered.

“Just make sure you don’t let the _cute smile_ walk away with our loot the next time,” Dani said consolingly and patted him on the shoulder.

Jensen groaned. After the last time, when Jared’s bomb had disabled their engine and Felicia had sworn murder onto him and all his family, living or dead, Jensen had thought the rest of the crew would take this more seriously. Unfortunately, more than four turns had passed without running into Jared and his crew again and Jensen’s inquiries hadn’t yielded much information.

Jared and his crew were relatively new to the smuggling world. Aldis had been around for a while apparently, but Jared and his two short friends, Gen and Osric, were wild cards. All Jensen had been able to dig up was that they’d done a few jobs and had a generally decent reputation in their business. There was also a pilot Jensen had never met, but from what he’d heard he didn’t need to. ‘Inappropriate’ was one of the nicer things folks said about him.

And if Jensen couldn’t stop obsessing over the little shit, well it wasn’t the worst thing to think about. Jensen rubbed his wrists, willing the phantom feeling of nakedness to go away.

He got up and poured himself a shot of shine. Dani was right: this wasn’t healthy, trading one obsession for another. He should really stop. Problem was, that wasn’t how it worked.  


Their next job didn’t go too well. And that was being generous.

Everything that could go wrong did, and a few unforeseeable events blew it all to shit. Jensen had put Dani and Misha on the only intact glider to get to their ship—fuck stealth, they just needed to get out of here, fast, before they became Gulla food—and he, Felicia, and Chris were running for their lives.

“We need to split,” Chris panted out when they rounded a corner in the narrow busy streets of Dossa.

Jensen scaled the rough side of a building to get an overview. When he’d found the two quickest ways back to the 8-15, he dropped down again. “Alright, Chris and Felicia, you go that way, I’m gonna take the route across the marketplace.”

“That’s way too dangerous, you’ll draw too much attention.”

Jensen gripped Felicia’s shoulder and gave her a short squeeze. “If I don’t make it to the ship by daybreak, you bury my ashes at the base of a tree,” he said and turned away from her outraged face, towards the wide open marketplace where the people of Dossa did most of their trading.

A troop of Dossa security passed them by and Jensen made a show of stumbling out of the niche they were hiding.

He heard Chris cursing behind him—he didn’t like it when Jensen took all the risks—but Jensen ignored it. Jensen was the better runner, the better fighter, and he would always put himself between his people and danger.

Jensen took off down the street, the security hot on his heels. He could hear them yelling in the harsh Gulla language and he understood enough to know that they’d hang him from the gallows by his own intestines if they caught him.

The Gulla might have the advantage of knowing the city but Jensen was much lighter on his feet than the ponderous scaled inhabitants of Dossa. He jumped over stalls, swung around corners by grabbing streetlights and then took a sharp turn into one of the large buildings. He needed an overview, he needed height.

He ran up the wide stairs, the heavy thumps of the guards' toeless feet spurring him on. He made it to the roof, continued running and jumped to the next building. He stumbled, but managed to catch himself. Panting, he looked over his shoulders at the guards angrily pointing their weapons at him.

They couldn’t follow—too heavy to make the jump—but they could still shoot. Jensen ran.

The Gulla continued to chase him from the street, ascending the buildings when he lingered too long. Jensen didn’t know how long he could keep this up, especially because the group that was following him continued to grow, more and more security chasing him.

Fuck.

Jensen pushed himself, jumped higher and longer, ran faster. His frenetic heartbeat was the only sound pounding in his ears and his side was throbbing sharply. He felt like he wasn’t getting enough oxygen and his legs started shaking. The only thing keeping him upright was the fact that the longer the Gulla chased him, the more time his crew had to get away.

Abruptly, the houses ended. He’d reached the edge of the city. Frantically, he looked around for a way off the building, when a mechanical whirring sound made him spin around.

There, a couple of feet above the building hovered a slim, short-range speeder. And on it was Jared.

Jensen blinked, his hurting body and the Gulla irrelevant for a moment.

Then Jared leaned forward, crooked smile popping a dimple, and he reached a hand out to Jensen. “Truce?” he asked.

There was death by hanging or Jared.

Jensen stepped forward and took Jared’s hand. His grip was tight and warm and he pulled the speeder up with Jensen still dangling in the air, but the Gulla were shooting at them so Jensen gave him a pass.

The cold air whipped past Jensen and he gripped Jared’s arm with both hands until Jared veered the speeder slightly to the side so Jensen could climb up behind him. Jensen held on to Jared’s hips and Jared took them down into the large plains before the city, the giant rough boulders and deep ravines providing enough cover that the Gulla would never find them.

With the imminent danger gone, Jensen was abruptly aware that Jared had just rescued him. Jared, the little shit of a thief who Jensen hadn’t been able to get out of his mind. Now, he was hyper-aware of Jared’s slim hips under his hands, his broad back protecting Jensen from the wind and his long hair tickling Jensen’s face.

He had no idea what Jared was doing here or why he’d saved him. He certainly couldn’t trust Jared. He was a thief, had stolen from Jensen twice. Technically, Jensen should kill him but now, he owed Jared his life.

_A life for a life. Someone takes a life, you take theirs. You owe someone your life, you give them yours. A life debt is sacrosanct, absolute. A life for a life._

Jensen’s fingers spasmed, itching to grip his wrists, his wristbands, touch the octagonal-cut stone. But it wasn’t there anymore. He was dead. No one owed a debt to a dead man.

He leaned back to let the cold air hit him in the face. He was dead. There was no life he could owe. Not that Jared, who probably didn’t have an ounce of honor in his body anyway, would ask for it.

It wasn’t long before Jared landed the speeder in the shadow of a large rock overhang. Warily, Jensen dismounted. Jared would not ask for his life but he might ask for something else. Surreptitiously, Jensen reached down to his belt and turned on the small beacon so his crew could find him.

“So,” Jared said after he’d swung his ridiculously long legs wrapped in tight gray pants over the speeder and turned towards Jensen. “Funny meeting you out here.”

His smile was open but his stance was wide, ready to fight and he hooked his thumbs into his belt, right next to his guns.

Jensen gave him an unconcerned smile and a shrug. “Beautiful scenery. What else would bring someone to Dossa?”

Jared grinned, mischief dancing in his eyes. “I hear great things about the hot springs.”

Jensen raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that more of a honeymoon thing?”

Slowly, Jared let his eyes wander up and down Jensen’s body only to look him in the eyes and shrug his shoulders in a fake innocent you-caught-me gesture.

The little shit was flirting with Jensen. Unbelievable.

The silence between them grew but it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was a challenge, Jared daring him to answer but content to wait for whatever Jensen came up with.

“You know, after what you did to my ship, I should shoot you.”

Jared nodded in understanding. “I get that. However, seeing as I just saved your ass, I think that’d be quite dishonorable.”

_Dishonor on our family._

“I’m a smuggler,” Jensen said, and his voice was more bitter than he’d intended. “I don’t have any honor.”

Jared raised his eyebrows. “That’s not what I heard. Jensen Ironheart, most honorable smuggler in the galaxy. Always pays what’s owed, never welshes on a deal, and even gave up his profit to save a bunch of orphans from certain death on Takku.”

“Honoring a deal is just good business,” Jensen said. So Jared had checked him out too? He wasn’t quite sure what to do with that. “And the story on Takku is widely blown out of proportion.”

Jared opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but closed it instead. He shrugged before he spoke again. “Fine. You’re an honorless bastard. I still don’t think you should shoot me. Otherwise how are you getting out of this field of rubble?”

Jensen looked up and saw the 8-15 approaching on the horizon. He pointed upwards. “My ride’s coming.”

Jared followed his finger and muttered a curse under his breath. “And here I risked my life for you…”

“I’ll take it as compensation for what you did to my ship,” Jensen said. It was a good deal, a fair deal. He ignored that it didn’t feel like nearly enough.

“I don’t think that’s fair,” Jared said, slowly walking towards Jensen. “Your life is worth much more than that piece of space rubbish.”

 _My life is worth nothing_ , Jensen thought, _because I don’t have a life. I am dead._ But he didn’t say that. Instead, he watched Jared stalking closer.

“So, I think now it's you who should pay me,” Jared said.

“What would you ask?” Jensen asked quietly.

Something in Jensen’s voice made Jared stop, not more than a handspan from Jensen. Jared’s eyes focused on his mouth. “I have a few ideas.”

“You’re a really cheap date,” Jensen said and reached for Jared’s hair.

The air between them was charged, almost buzzing with the tension.

Jared gripped Jensen’s side. He ran his fingers down Jensen’s ribcage and around, digging into Jensen’s back and Jensen trailed his fingers along the sharp edge of Jared’s jaw. The contact made his blood hot and his heart beat faster. Jared was so close, but Jensen was in no hurry to lean in. He wanted to savor this, the anticipation and the danger. The insanity of it only made it better.

Jared grinned at him, a high flush on his cheeks. “You’re not getting a second date if you call me cheap.”

Jensen heard the whirring of the coil and then the hook for his belt hit him in the back. He reached back to hook it to his belt and then smirked at Jared. “Who says I’d want a second date?”

Jared’s dimpled grin was wide. “Oh, I know you will.”

The rope jumped and then pulled Jensen up. He watched Jared get smaller and smaller. Honorable, Jared had called him, and Jensen didn’t know what to do with that.

It wasn’t until he’d opened several bottles with his crew—to celebrate their successful heist and to forget the roiling emotions Jared caused in him—that he realized why Jared had been so sure about Jensen wanting another date. He’d managed to steal Jensen’s satchel with the highly concentrated Gulla oil in it.

Fuck. The crew would never let him hear the end of it.

 

 

**Jensen NOW**

 

Back on the 8-15, Jensen took a bunch of painkillers, ate an energy bar and then looked into the worried faces of his crew. Jared and his people were sitting with them and Jensen noticed that their crews had apparently intermingled. At least Misha and Osric seemed cozy and Dani sat closer to Gen that she usually would to other people. But all their faces showed expressions of varying degrees of worry.

Jared apparently picked up on it too. “What?” he asked. “I thought you fixed the ship?”

Jensen cocked his head and listened to his ship as it sailed out of the planet’s atmosphere.

“Felicia, I don’t mean to question your expertise, but this doesn’t sound like it’s fixed.”

Felicia’s face was grim. “It isn’t. The secondary ignition system was damaged so badly, I had to patch it up with tape, glue and aluminium sheeting. Now it’s gonna get us to Jared’s ship but not much further.”

“Fuck.”

“It’s not a problem,” Jared said casually.

“How is this not a problem?”

Jared looked at him like Jensen was the biggest idiot in the world. “We’ll give you a ride. We stash your ship on the moon, then we fly over to Jim’s junkyard, get you the parts you need and bring you back.”

Jensen raised his eyebrows. “That’s a lot of flying.”

“Yeah, Jared,” Aldis said. “That’s lot of flying for a guy who almost got himself killed.”

“Hey!” Dani glared at them. “Without us, you would still be stuck on that planet because you got your transport pod shot up!”

“We only got shot because you screwed up,” Chad hissed and it went downhill from there.

Jensen watched as his and Jared’s crews started a shouting match. It was impossible to make out who was shouting what.

When Jensen caught the words “Cortarola” and “Rallah” he knew it was time to step in. But Jared’s hand wrapped around his wrist before he was more than half out of his seat.

“Let them vent for a little longer,” he said with a small smile.

“Do you think this is funny?” Jensen asked incredulously.

“Hey, we started out exactly like this. But we got a few bonding moments. They didn’t.”

Jensen looked back at their crews. Jared’s pilot was red in the face from all the screaming, Chris was gesticulating so widely, Jensen was afraid someone was going to lose an eye, Felicia was poking a wrench viciously at Aldis who just threw his hands up in exasperation, Gen’s hand was resting on her weapon and Dani was almost nose to nose with her.

Only Osric and Misha stood a little apart, quietly talking but Jensen could see from the twitches in Misha’s ears that they were making bets.

“Yeah, this is going great,” he said dryly.

Jared pulled a face. “At least Osric and your furry friend get along.”

Jensen watched them for a little longer but when it didn’t look like they’d calm down, he had enough. He needed rest, in a bed with some ointment on his shoulder to help with the swelling and bandages on his feet.

“Alright, that’s enough!” His voice was grave-rough and seven pairs of human eyes and all of Misha’s ears focused on him in shock, Jared’s crew only a little more surprised than his.

“Now,” he continued at a normal level, “I realize that our history is a little… strained.”

There was some muttering but after a glare they all shut up.

“While we did part ways on bad terms in the past, I think we did pretty well escaping together recently,” he shot a glance at Jared, “even though you still tried to get one over on us after we saved your ass from Rallah.”

“Can you blame me for trying?” Jared asked with an innocent grin and at this point, Jensen couldn’t even get mad anymore.

“So, I think it’s only fair that you give us a ride to Jim’s.”

“In exchange for the amulet?” Jared asked.

“In exchange for getting you off the Nivonir’s planet,” Jensen said. “Which you did crash on. And we split sales profits.”

“Sixty—forty,” Jared shot back immediately.

Jensen raised an eyebrow but Jared just shrugged unperturbed. “Hey, I need to look out for myself and mine. And right now, you’re the one who desperately needs a ride.”

Unfortunately, Jared was right.

“Fine,” Jensen said through gritted teeth and held his hand out, “sixty-forty.”

With a beaming smile, Jared shook his hand. And to his horror, Jensen realized that his reaction was split. Part of him wanted to shake Jared. The other part wanted to kiss him. It was probably sixty-forty and Jensen didn't want to think about which side was winning.

“Alright, let’s get the 8-15 on the moon. The faster we get to Jim’s, the quicker we’re out of each other’s hair.”

Misha warbled, his ears swirling in a big circle.

“Shut up,” Jensen muttered. The rest of his crew laughed heartlessly.

He chanced a look at Jared but he seemed unaware that Misha’s comment had been directed at the quality of his hair. Jensen was fiercely grateful for that. He glared at his crew in a way that he hoped communicated that this topic was off-limits and thankfully their only reactions were knowing smirks, though Chris looked at him thoughtfully which was actually worse.

“Dani, get us to that moon; Felicia, show me the damage. Chris, pack whatever we’ll need. And Misha: sleep. We’ll need you sharp as soon as we get out there.”

Misha grumbled and let out a low hoot.

Jensen rubbed his face. “Oh stars…”

Chris clapped Misha on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep you posted.”

“Your crew is weird,” Jared commented from right behind Jensen.

Jensen was glad he’d trained startling out of himself. “You have no idea,” he said. “Felicia! Let’s move.”

Thankfully, Felicia was right. It was only the secondary ignition system which was screwed. It was a part easy enough to get if you knew the right people. Jensen did. Jim had been around for as long as Jensen could remember and his tiny planet was filled with parts for every ship imaginable. If he didn’t have what someone needed, he could usually construct it out of a few other parts. The 8-15 would be fine.

Dani put them down in a crater of the moon and hid the 8-15 under a spiky overhang that leaned outwards so far it covered the entire ship.

Chris had packed bags with weapons and clothes that they carried over to Jared’s ship.

“I also threw together a stew,” Chris said, holding up the giant pot. “First meal is on us.”

Curiously, Gen came over and lifted the lid. She sniffed and her eyes widened in surprise. “Is that trelsie stew?”

“Homemade?” Osric asked hopefully.

Chris’ smile was smug. “Of course.”

Gen beamed. “Okay, I take it back; flying you over is a great idea.”

Aldis harrumphed and Jared laughed. “Okay food first, then we’ll divvy you up to sleep. It’s gonna get cozy, though,” Jared said, “we only have three extra beds.”

“I’m not sharing,” Chad said immediately and crossed his arms across his chest.

“No one wants to sleep with you, douchebag,” Dani bit out.

“That’s what you’re saying now.” Chad waggled his eyebrows.

Dani’s eyes narrowed to thin slits. “You little—”

“Woah,” Jared said, raising his hands. “Come on guys, where’s your hospitality?”

“No one is getting my bed,” Aldis said. “Sharing our ship is enough.”

“Yeah,” Gen said. “Homemade trelsie stew or not. Or are you going to lead by example, Jared?”

Jared grinned then looked at Jensen. “Don’t mind if I do.”

Jensen rolled his eyes. “We’ll get our sleeping bags from the 8-15 and we can camp out here and in your spare room.

“He chooses the floor over the captain’s bed,” Chad said. “Harsh.”

Misha chirped lowly.

“Not necessarily a bad thing,” Dani said with a dirty grin.

Jared turned to her. “Wait, you all understand that?”

“You don’t?”

Jared and the rest of his crew shook their heads. Only Osric gave Misha a conspiratorial smile.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Jensen said because he didn’t need a discussion about the pros and cons of Jared’s physical appearance and whether he would mind that Jared would take up so much space in a bed.

“Let’s just eat and get some sleep. We’ve all had a long couple of days.”  


Dinner was a mostly quiet affair. Jensen wasn’t really surprised. They’d all been running on fumes the last few days. Felicia’s eyes were drooping and Chris was clearly moving on autopilot. Dani was resting her head on her hand, elbow on the table even though she usually insisted on eating with poise. Misha was actually eating with his three eyes closed and his ears hanging limply off his head.

Jared’s crew wasn’t doing much better.

After dinner, Jensen sent his people off to the two cabins with the extra beds. Misha preferred hard and warm surfaces to sleep on, so Osric showed him the Imp’s engine room. That only left Jensen.

He felt the exhaustion deep in his bones but at least his shoulder had stopped hurting as long as he didn’t move it. Strangely enough, he wasn’t sleepy.

“I wasn’t kidding before,” Jared said with a crooked smile. “I’ll share.”

Jensen was sorely tempted. But his ship was stashed on a moon without an engine. He was dependant on Jared’s help. Falling into bed with him was stupid. So very, very stupid.

“I have a sleeping bag.”

“Suit yourself,” Jared said with a mercurial smile.

 

Jared’s cabin was small and messy. Clothes were lying around everywhere, equipment and guns littered a table in front of a comm screen. The bed, oversized compared to standard spaceship outfitting, took up most of the room.

Jared caught him staring at it.

“I’m a big guy,” he said, “and while I like to cuddle, I don’t want to fall out of bed if I roll over once.”

The thing was, Jensen knew about Jared’s sleeping and cuddling habits. At least when Jared was cold and fearing an impending execution. Violently, Jensen pushed the memories aside.

“I’ll just put myself down in the corner there.”

Jared sighed exaggeratedly. “I had a feeling you’re not the kind for fun but I couldn’t help but hope…”

“I like to have fun,” Jensen shot back, “with people I can trust.”

Jared opened his mouth to protest.

“No. You try to play me every chance you get, you don’t listen even when I’m the one with a plan to save you, you’re annoying—on purpose by the way—and just because I wanted to hook up with you ages ago, it doesn’t mean I still do.”

Jared was grinning widely and raised his hand. He stretched out his index finger and started ticking off his points. “You try to play me back every time, my plan was better than yours, you like it, and yes you do.”

“I also almost died today,” Jensen said because, unfortunately, Jared was right. Not that he’d ever admit that.

Jared’s eyes glimmered with mirth. “I can go easy on you.”

And Jensen could see it. How Jared would push him down on the bed and crawl into his lap, how he’d undress both of him. How his mouth, usually so clever with words would be so clever on Jensen’s skin, how—

Jensen forced his mind to stop. There was another reason he really didn’t want to go down this path. Jared had gotten under his skin, way too deep already, and Jensen couldn’t do this. For Jared, everything was a game. Jensen was long past that.

Somehow Jared must have seen the resolve on his face because his expression turned serious.

“At least share the bed with me. I promise, I won’t bite and you need it.”

Jared was right again. And it wasn’t like they hadn’t shared a bed before.

In front of the mirror of Jared’s tiny wet-cell, with a borrowed toothbrush, Jensen told himself that everything would be fine. He’d done this before and it had been _fine_.

When he climbed into bed, he made sure to put as much space as possible between them.

Jared huffed but thankfully didn’t comment. Jensen closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind. Unfortunately, his mind didn’t stop replaying the feeling of Jared in his arms from the one time they had shared a bed.

 

  
  


**Jared + Jensen THEN**

 

On Raverel, Jared stole Jensen’s latest shipment of navigation chips; a week later, Jensen stole them back. When Jared smuggled 10 crates of real wine out of the Traminer Kingdom, Jensen took half of it, and three turns later, they both went after the same fertility artifact but due to their bickering allowed Speight’s crew to pick it up from underneath them.

Jared and Jensen had still been yelling at each other when the planet’s population showed up and they had to haul ass or end up on the four-legged, big-mouthed inhabitants’ menu.

 

By time they reached Atturog, Jensen was over his last encounter with Jared. After the fertility artifact debacle, he’d successfully smuggled a flock of norcars without any crewmember losing an extremity, he’d run several small shipments and they had daringly liberated one of the old empires of several crates of first grade medicine.

So what if Jared and his crew had apparently managed to smuggle seven crates of Rhashku gold out of their kingdom’s reach and managed to get their hands on the amulet of Reia?

Jensen wasn’t obsessed, he was just keeping up with the competition which tended to steal from him. And even though Jared had saved his life, Jensen’s crew agreed he’d only done it for his own gain so Jensen didn’t owe him squat. As a matter of fact, since Jared had stolen from Jensen, he had negated any claim on any debt anyway.

Still, Jared was someone to keep an eye on, to pay attention to. Encounters with him were… challenging.

As was dealing with Rallah. But where Jared was a challenge in a way that made Jensen’s blood pump faster, that made his lips curl in anticipation and his body itch for a chase or a fight, Rallah was a challenge in a way that would cost him his life if he didn’t pay enough attention.

But Rallah always dealt in cash which Jensen needed to pay for the ship’s new oxygen filter. Felicia had informed him in no uncertain terms that theirs was past fixing and needed replacing. So Jensen had taken a job from Rallah even though she made his skin crawl.

Rallah had ruled these frost covered hills for as long as anyone Jensen had ever talked to knew, and she traded in everything. Jensen didn’t know for what gain—she didn’t have any visible riches or comforts. Maybe it was the power. Maybe it was a way to pass the time. Jensen didn’t need to know. All he needed was Rallah’s shims. And this time Jensen and his crew were delivering a crate of third generation blaster guns from the Empire’s Army. Just because the Empire wasn’t around anymore—foundered on its own hubris—didn’t mean that collectors didn’t want their weapons. Jensen didn’t know if Rallah collected or resold but again, he didn’t need to know. Felicia had been on his case for almost a turn now and either way, Rallah would pay.

Rallah inspected the crates with her slim, jointless fingers, then turned her eyeless face towards Jensen.

“This is better quality than Rallah expected.” Her voice was high and raspy, like it had to scratch past Rallah’s long, serrated teeth.

Jensen bowed. “Only the best for Rallah.”

Rallah made a humming sound that felt too deep for her slim body. “Do you want more payment?”

Jensen shook his head. He’d seen what happened to people who tried to renegotiate with Rallah. “We agreed on a price and that is all Rallah owes me.”

Rallah hummed again, and this time it resonated unpleasantly through Jensen’s entire body.

“You humans, you procreate physically, yes?”

Perplexed, Jensen nodded. Then again, with Rallah’s slim body, no obvious opening anywhere, he couldn’t even imagine how her species procreated and he didn’t want to think about it either.

“And you enjoy procreating physically?” Rallah’s voice was filled with curious disdain.

“It can be pleasurable,” Jensen said diplomatically because with Rallah, being careful was the first rule of the day.

“So Rallah has heard,” Rallah said. Then she waved to one of her grunting, hispid servants which promptly slouched out of the room.

Rallah remained still. With no eyes, Jensen had no idea where her attention was.

“Is there anything else Rallah would like to discuss?” he asked carefully.

“No,” Rallah said. “Rallah will give you what you are owed, and Rallah will give you what you are due for providing excellent quality. Rallah appreciates good trade.”

Jensen bowed to hide his confusion. He wished the rest of his crew were here to back him up but Rallah only negotiated with the leader of whatever crew she dealt with.

So Jensen waited for whatever Rallah had sent her minion to fetch. As it turned out when the minion returned only a little while later, it wasn’t so much a what as a who. It was Jared.

Jared’s eyes widened when he saw Jensen and he looked between him and Rallah in confusion.

“Is this a pleasing specimen?” Rallah asked Jensen and it dawned on him where this was going. And really, he should have seen this coming.

Jensen didn’t smuggle people. It was the one cargo he never took. Rallah had no such qualms. So Jensen turned an assessing gaze on Jared.

“The hair’s a little floppy,” Jensen said and Jared narrowed his eyes at him, “but otherwise, he’s acceptable.”

“He’s tall, for a human,” Rallah said. “You humans, you have a thing about size. Rallah thought that would be good. Rallah sent for the tallest human in the dungeon.”

“That’s a keen observation,” Jensen said. “Bigger is indeed better.”

And Jared, the little shit, let his eyes trail down Jensen’s body, and then up again with a raised eyebrow.

“Good,” Rallah sad. “Rallah expects him back alive. He still has his dues to pay. But you can have him until you leave again.”

Jensen bowed, trying to hide his surprise that procreating in Rallah’s species apparently involved killing someone—then again, Rallah was the only one of her species Jensen had ever seen or heard of so they couldn’t be too numerous—and then Rallah left, ordering her minon to bring Jared to Jensen’s quarters.

Jared shot Jensen a half pleading, half furious look and then stumbled after the minion, dragged along by the chain around his hands.

Well fuck.

 

Jensen went back outside to where his crew was waiting.

“Jensen!” Dani exclaimed, overly cheerful. She hated Rallah’s planet, especially the cold temperature. “Apparently Rallah has invited us to spend the night. Isn’t that wonderful?”

Jensen thought about Jared waiting for him and didn’t know what to think. He’d been dreaming of taking his revenge on that little shit for months, but if Jared was here, in Rallah’s prison, something had gone horribly wrong for him and despite everything, Jensen didn’t actually want to see Jared dead.

“I know. In thanks for the excellent quality of our shipment, Rallah has provided a human for me to procreate with,” Jensen said to the four stunned faces of his human crew members.

Misha just twitched two of his ears, before wiggling the back ones.

“It’s Jared,” Jensen said quietly.

If possible, the rest of his crew looked even more stunned.

“What do we do?” Felicia finally asked.

“I’m gonna find out what's up, then we talk,” Jensen said because he knew what Felicia meant.

Rallah’s wrath was infamous; to incur it meant almost certain death. And Jared and his crew had stolen from them, twice, so Jensen didn't owe him anything. But Jensen already knew that he couldn’t leave anyone to die in Rallah’s prison who didn’t deserve to be there. And Jared might be a thief, but he wasn’t a bad person.

 

Rallah had given Jensen a spacious room with a truly gigantic bed. There were no pillows but instead a pile of thick, fluffy blankets which was good because the room was as cold as Rallah’s entire palace. Jensen was wearing a thick thermo jacket, but considering the temperature, even that might not be enough to be comfortable during the night.

Jared sat curled up on the bed, one of the fluffy blankets wrapped around him like a cocoon.

Jensen raised an eyebrow.

Jared shot him an annoyed look. “Rallah thought it would be convenient if I wasn’t wearing any clothes.”

Jensen stopped. “You’re naked under there?”

“Hey, it’s not that I’m ashamed of my body,” Jared said indignantly, “but it is fucking freezing in here. And goosebumps don’t look good on anyone.”

Jensen didn’t know what to say to that so he stayed silent. He scanned the room for anything else and saw a table off to the side with small bowls on it. He walked over to what he assumed to be food and saw he was right. There was a carafe with water—Jensen first sniffed it, then stuck his finger in and licked it, because with non-humanoid alien hospitality you could never be too careful—and the bowls held steaming portions of what looked like grains with different sauces.

He looked over to Jared. “Hungry?”

“Starving.”

“Too cold to get out of bed?” Jensen snorted.

Jared snarled and raised his leg until his bare foot peeked out of the blanket and Jensen could see the shackle around his ankle.

“In case I wasn’t amenable to procreating with you,” Jared said, completely deadpan. “Rallah didn’t want your gift to run away.”

“I see,” Jensen said.

Jared made a pensive face. “I don’t think Rallah knows that two men can’t have children.”

“I won’t tell her if you don’t,” Jensen said and carefully tested the grain looking things one after another. Surprisingly, except for the blue one, they all tasted good.

He made a bowl for himself, and one for Jared with a hefty portion of the blue stuff mixed in. Served him right for getting caught.

“So,” Jensen said when he carried the food back to bed and handed Jared a bowl, “what did you do to piss Rallah off?"

Jared was too busy to answer because he snarfed down the food, blue grains and all. He did pull a face but he only answered after he’d practically inhaled half the bowl.

“In my defense, I didn’t know Rallah had such a short fuse,” Jared said.

“You tried to renegotiate,” Jensen said.

“I tried to renegotiate,” Jared said with an exasperated sigh. “But she sent us on the mission with incomplete information. We had to use way more ammo to get out and if you raise the price of acquisition you have to pay more.”

Jensen shook his head. “Ah no, Rallah does not see it that way.”

“Indeed, she doesn’t,” Jared said and looked morosely into the bowl, only clumps of blue left. Then he peered over to Jensen who was eating contentedly. “Did you give me the gross stuff on purpose?” Jared asked.

“You tried to renegotiate with Rallah,” Jensen said with emphasis. “Probably the fourth rule of intergalactic smuggling is: don’t renegotiate with Rallah.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, oh wise, old one,” Jared said and gave a mock bow. “No one taught me the secret code of the intergalactic smugglers.”

That made Jensen curious. Usually, if someone stumbled into this life, it was either because they were dragged along or they got stuck, but most of the time there was someone around to show them the ropes. Survival just wasn’t possible otherwise.

But instead of asking, he said, “Too bad. You could have used it.”

Jared raised his eyebrows, giving Jensen an unimpressed look. “Before this mess, I was doing just fine. And, may I remind you, on Gulla, I was the one to save your ass.”

“Yeah, because you wanted to steal from me,” Jensen hissed.

Jared grinned entirely too smugly for someone chained to a bed. “Thrice.”

The pretentious little shit.

“If you’re not nice,” Jensen said and warningly pointed his spoon at Jared, “I’m not getting you anything else to eat.”

For a moment, Jared glared, then he lunged at Jensen, or more precisely, for his bowl.

They tussled, the bowl landing upside down on the bed, but Jensen wasn’t shackled down, and even though Jared knew what he was doing, Jensen was a fighter through and through.

It didn’t take him long to pin Jared to the bed.

Jared’s chest was heaving and his cheeks were pink with exertion.

“And what did that get you?” Jensen asked, his hands pinning Jared’s wrists to the bed. He could feel Jared’s pulse under the thin skin and his own pulse started to hammer in response to the incredible intimacy.

Of course, Jared was oblivious. He just shrugged. “It was fun. And I know one more thing about you.”

Jensen pulled back immediately.

“You’re unbelievable,” he said and busied himself wiping the grains off the bed.

“I’m still hungry,” Jared said.

“And who’s fault is that?” Jensen shot back but when he looked over, Jared made a truly pathetic picture.

He was in the process of rewrapping himself into the blanket, but his left shoulder and arm were still free and his tan skin was covered in goosebumps. His hair was mussed and the pouty expression made him look years younger, innocent and lost.

For a moment, Jensen felt for him, this lost and shackled boy, then Jared looked up at him through his hair and gave him a hopeful, one-dimpled smile. “I’d be really grateful if you could get me another bowl.”

For a moment, Jensen stared in amazement. Then, slowly, he asked, “Was there ever anything you didn’t get if you asked people nice enough?”

Jared looked as if he really had to think about it. “No? I mean, either they give me what I want or I just take it. Things just… have a habit of going my way.”

“Except now,” Jensen said dryly.

“It’s not over yet,” Jared said with a winning grin, “right now it can still turn into an amazing adventure. Kind of depends on you actually.”

Jensen rolled his eyes. “Someone really needs to teach you a lesson before you get your crew killed.”

“Lesson taught,” Jared said, and stuck out his foot towards Jensen again. “Now get me out of here?” He wiggled his foot imperiously.

Jensen looked at the shackle, then laughed in Jared’s face.  


Jensen eventually got Jared another bowl of food after he’d explained that there was no way anyone beside Rallah would be able to open the shackle.

Jared had fallen quiet after that. It seemed that the seriousness of the situation was finally sinking in.

“You can’t help with that or are you just yanking my chain again?” he’d asked and gestured to the shackle.

“No. It’d be a suicide run and the chances of success are just about zero.”

Jared had nodded and disappeared deeper into his blanket cocoon.

Now, they sat in silence on opposing ends of the bed, wrapped up in blankets. Jensen had taken one for himself because the cold was slowly seeping into his body but had given Jared the third blanket since he didn’t even have clothes.

Jared seemed to be getting drowsy, another side effect of the cold and who knew how long he'd been awake before, but Jensen couldn’t go to sleep.

If he did nothing, Jared and his crew would probably die. Through his inquiry about them, he knew they didn’t deserve death. But going against Rallah would mean his own certain death. Even if they managed to get everyone off-planet, Rallah would put a bounty on his head so high he’d have to hide out on an asteroid and never leave. And even then he might not be safe.

If he wanted to save Jared and his crew he needed to find another way to do it. An honest way. He needed to make a deal with Rallah. The question was only for what.

He sat and spun the possibilities in his mind. He catalogued everything he knew about Rallah, everything she collected and every thief and smuggler and opponent she’d punished and for what. It was a long list.

“So, listen.”

Jensen glanced over at Jared who looked more awake again.

“It’s my fault that my crew is locked up here, with me.” Jared wasn’t looking at Jensen, instead staring down into his lap. “I may be able to barter with Rallah, get her to let them go. Would you give them a ride off-planet? We hid our ship and only came down here in a transport shuttle, so it’s not far away.”

“Of course,” Jensen said. Jared thought he could still barter with Rallah? That was interesting.

Jared looked up, surprise written clear across his face.

Jensen snorted derisively. “What, you think I’d leave them here in Rallah’s clutches just because you stole from us?”

From Jared’s facial expression, he’d thought exactly that. Then he gave Jensen a self-deprecating smile. “I tend not to believe everything I hear about people, Jensen Ironheart. Maybe I should.”

Jensen flinched. He knew why he’d gotten the nickname and nothing could be further from the truth. He wasn’t steadfast, he had no honor.

“Then again, in my defense,” Jared said and licked his lips. “Technically, we stole from you three times.”

“No one ever told you when to quit, did they?”

“You don’t get anywhere if you give up. Perseverance is key.”

_We will persevere while you perish._

Jensen’s fists balled on their own accord and he relaxed them again. He needed to focus on the present.

“You said you have something to barter with Rallah. What is it?”

Jared looked at him suspiciously. “What, you wanna screw me over after all?”

Jensen shook his head. “While I enjoy seeing you like this”—he waved at Jared’s abysmal state—“I don’t want you dead. Least of all because then I can’t get revenge.”

Jared grinned. “I’m listening.”

“There might be a way to get you and your crew out of here,” Jensen said. “But it’s not going to be easy and I get half.”

“Half of what?”

“Half of whatever’s still stashed on your ship.” Jensen gave Jared a challenging look.

“There’s nothing on my ship. Rallah’s was the only job we pulled.”

Jensen smiled and shook his head. “Come on, Jared, I’m not stupid. The only thing you’d have to barter is more of what Rallah already wants. You tried to renegotiate, with more of what you offered as your backup. I just want half.”

Jared glared. Jensen held his gaze.

Jared was the first to snap. He threw his hands up in defeat, dislodging the blankets around his shoulders, and revealing the sharp line of his clavicle and his upper chest before he hissed and pulled the blankets closed again.

“Fine,” he bit out. “Half. Now, tell me how to get out of here.”

Jensen grinned and did.

Afterwards, Jared disbelievingly shook his head. “That’s insane. And it will never work.”

“Do you have a better plan?”

“No,” Jared said, “but I still have a whole night to come up with something else.”

“Go ahead,” Jensen said and arranged himself on the bed, “but I’m going to catch a few hours of sleep.”

“Fucking bastard,” was the last thing Jensen heard Jared mumble, but he thought it was lacking bite.  


Jensen woke because someone was shaking his shoulders. He shot up, reaching for his attacker and it took a startled yelp for him to realize that he’d wrestled a blanket-cocooned Jared into a headlock.

“What the fuck,” Jared croaked out, pulling frantically at Jensen’s arm.

Jensen let him go and Jared scrambled away ungracefully, arms and legs caught in the blankets. Tey slipped, revealing strong shoulders and the sliver of a dark tattoo between his shoulder blades.

“Why did you wake me?” Jensen asked because it couldn’t have been more than three hours and the world outside the small round windows was still dark.

Jared rubbed his neck and regarded Jensen carefully. “You were dreaming.”

Shit. Jensen didn’t share his bed with someone often enough that it was a problem, and the times when Misha had come into his room to wake him were rare.

He dug through his memories of yesterday, tried to pinpoint what might have triggered his nightmare.

_We will persevere while you perish._

Of course. Jensen rubbed his face. “Sorry about that.”

Jared slowly shook his head. “Don’t worry about it.” Then, “You wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

Jared was still looking at him, his eyes squinted in worry and Jensen wondered what he’d said.

“My parents died when I was really young,” Jared offered unexpectedly.

“I’m sorry.” Jensen’s answer was wooden. He didn’t want to talk about it but he couldn't let that pass uncommented.

“I saw it happen,” Jared said, and his voice was very calm. “My father knew what was going to happen so he hid me.”

“You don’t need to tell me,” Jensen said.

“I want to.”

“I won’t tell you anything in return.”

“You don’t need to,” Jared said. “Anyway, he knew they were coming for us. So he stashed me in a giant old cabinet, between a bunch of old folders.”

“You really don't need to tell me this,” Jensen tried to interject.

“Shut up. My mother was fighting them off, with one of those big candelabras, you know? I think she kicked some serious ass before they killed her. I think she knew she wouldn’t make it but she wanted to give my father time to hide me.”

“Jared—“

“I said shut up!” Jared bit out, then he settled and continued in a calm voice. “My father had time to pull a weapon but there were still too many. Then they went off towards my room but of course they didn’t find me. My nanny was the one who pulled me out when they were gone. They’d taken my parents’ bodies but a candlestick was still lying on the ground.”

Jared looked up at Jensen. “I still dream of that candlestick. I never see my parents. I don't even remember what they looked liked. I just remember that fucking candlestick. Isn’t that fucked up?”

Jensen cleared his throat. “Yeah, it is.”

They sat in silence. It stretched, uncomfortable and stifling.

“What did I say?” Jensen finally asked.

“You called for your mother,” Jared said. “And I will never make fun of you for that.”

Jensen fell back on the bed and let out a hollow laugh. “My mother isn’t dead. I am.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Go back to sleep.”

  


The next time, it was Jensen who woke. Jared was sleeping fitfully, obviously shivering under his blankets. Jensen himself was feeling cold. He thought the temperature might have dropped again. He started moving, tensing and relaxing his muscles, rubbing his hands and arms and legs but the cold was deep and biting. Fuck Rallah.

He looked over to Jared and, rationally, Jensen knew the easiest way to get warm. He didn’t even know what made him hesitate. There was nothing Jared could steal this time. Jared wouldn’t hurt him or try to get one over on him; Jared needed him to get out of there.

Still, Jensen remained where he was. It was silly, really. It was just fucking sharing body heat. A simple survival strategy. He wouldn’t let a simple conversation about Jared’s dead parents throw him off.

Determined, Jensen crawled over to Jared and lifted the second blanket.

“Wha—”

“It’s too cold,” Jensen said.

Jared shifted until Jensen could fit under the second blanket, then snuggled back against his chest, completely inhibitionless.

“Knew you still liked me,” Jared mumbled. “But no feeling me up while I sleep.”

“Unbelievable,” Jensen said, but Jared had already fallen back asleep.

Jensen decided to let it go and pulled his blanket around them too. He scooted closer to the warmth Jared seemed to be radiating despite the freezing temperature and used Jared’s shoulder as a pillow. Jared's hair was falling against his forehead and his shoulders were moving with every breath he took and Jensen easily fell asleep.

 

When Jensen woke again he was lying on his back with Jared’s head on his chest. The rest of Jared seemed to be half-draped across Jensen, half-pressed to his side. Jensen’s right arm was trapped under Jared’s body and so numb that Jensen was surprised to see his hand resting on Jared’s neck, fingers tangled in Jared’s hair. The blankets were wrapped way too tight around Jensen’s legs and his left arm was hanging out, freezing.

The joys of bed sharing.

He pulled his frozen hand back under the blanket and ran through the plan again. There wasn’t a lot of wiggle room. He looked at the crown of Jared’s head and at his own hand on Jared’s neck. Maybe they’d need more to convince Rallah?

First he needed to get out of bed and find a place to relieve himself.

There was no way to extract himself from their shared cocoon without waking Jared and there was no reason why he should get more sleep than Jensen anyway, so Jensen unceremoniously shook him awake and then crawled out of the blankets.

Jared groaned and wrapped himself up so tight that only the tip of his nose and his hair was sticking out. “When do they turn up the heat in this fucking place?”

“They don’t,” Jensen said. “The sun’s powerful enough to give Rallah what she needs. Give it a few hours and it’ll be okay for us too.”

The door to their room was still locked and there was nothing else to use, so Jensen settled on one of the small windows in the wall. There was one at the perfect height and right now Jensen didn’t actually care what was down below.

When he turned around, Jared was watching him avidly. “Classy.”

“You see anywhere else to do this?”

Dismally, Jared looked around. “Fine.” He pointed a finger at Jensen. “But no peeking!”

Then he extracted himself from all but his first blanket and went looking for a hole he could reach with the chain around his foot.

Jensen turned to the table with the water carafe. There was enough in there for two people to wash their hands and faces but that was about it.

When they had both cleaned up, it was slowly getting warmer, but Jared was still naked and their plan was still insane.

“Maybe,” Jared started, “we should have… evidence?”

“Evidence,” Jensen repeated flatly.

Jared shrugged. “Yes?”

Jensen nodded. He had actually been thinking along similar lines. “Rallah seems to expect a certain… violence.”

Jared pulled a grimace. “Fun. How do you want to do this?”

“Can you handle pain?” Jensen asked.

“Please.” Jared gave him a challenging look. “Bring it.”

Jensen rolled his eyes, then slowly reached for Jared’s wrist. This was just a ruse, nothing else. It didn’t mean anything. “Tell me if it gets too much.”

Slowly he dug his fingers in, well above the wrist bones, just putting pressure on his lower arm, careful not to constrict the artery. “Good?”

Jared shook his head. “No. You need more. I don’t bruise easy.”

So Jensen increased the pressure until Jared flinched.

He pulled his hand back and looked at the red prints his fingers had left. Something hot and volatile shot through him and he forced himself to stay still.

“Oh stars,” Jared muttered then gripped his other wrist and put pressure on it himself. “If you’re too delicate to do it, I’m gonna bruise myself up.”

And while Jared pissed him off to no end, Jensen didn’t actually want to physically hurt him. So he watched Jared dig his fingers into his wrists, arms and shoulders. Then he lowered the blanket and gripped his waist tight. Jensen couldn’t look away.

When he was done, Jared looked calculatingly at Jensen’s mouth. “Bitemarks?”

Jensen nodded. “I think Rallah’s species might actually eat each other.”

For a moment, Jared looked appalled, then his face morphed into a pensive expression. “I can see it,” he said, then stepped towards Jensen and tilted his head back. “Go for it.”

Jensen told himself that this wasn’t a big deal and stepped forward. Jared was a few inches taller than him, so he had no problem leaning in and pressing his mouth to Jared’s neck. He had never given anyone a hickey on purpose—while he’d tried to discard most habits from his former life, he’d never gotten used to public expressions of intimacy—but he knew how it worked.

He sucked, and heard Jared’s breath hitch.

“More,” Jared said and his voice sounded rougher than before.

Jensen needed a moment. Jared’s skin was warm and smooth, and Jensen could smell him and taste him, sweat, the metallic tang that came from living on a spaceship, and the faint hint of a plant Jensen couldn’t name but could’ve sworn smelled familiar. Jensen moved his mouth down, to the meatier part of Jared’s shoulder, and dug his teeth in. This time Jared hissed and his hands gripped Jensen's shoulders.

“More,” Jared repeated. “I don’t think Rallah will be placated by two bite marks.”

So Jensen spun Jared around, pushed Jared’s hair out of the way and left a line of bruises down the strong line of his neck. He gripped his shoulders tight and left more finger shaped prints.

Jared’s breathing sped up but he didn’t complain. “If you use your fingernails, it’ll be more visible,” he ground out at one point.

He was probably right. Slowly, Jensen scratched lines along Jared’s spine, slid his finger under the blanket, along his sides and over chest. He felt Jared’s muscles tense, his nipples harden, and his tendons flex under his hands, and he wanted to trace it all. He pulled his hands back to Jared’s back and when he reached the upper lines of the tattoo Jensen stopped. He didn’t go lower, didn’t pull the blanket out of the way even though by that point his fingers itched to explore every inch of Jared’s beautiful body. Especially the intricate tip of the tattoo right underneath his fingertips. But that wasn’t what this was about.

He forced himself to step back. With a deep breath, Jared pulled the blanket up again, then turned around. His cheeks were flushed and his pupils were eating up all the color of his irises.

“To be safe,” he said and started worrying his bottom lip between his teeth.

“I don’t think Rallah even knows what kissing is,” Jensen said and his voice came out hoarse.

“You never know,” Jared said, never taking his eyes off Jensen’s face. “Now what?”

“Now we wait,” Jensen said and stalked back to the bed.

Jared came to sit beside him. The room was slowly warming with the rising sun outside as they sat in silence.

“Why is this taking so long?” Jared asked, worry in his voice.

“I don’t know. But I doubt she’s forgotten about us.”

Jared hummed. “Okay the waiting will drive me nuts. Tell me a story.”

“What?”

Imperiously, Jared waved a hand. “You've been around a while, oh wise old smuggler. So, tell me something. I don’t know, maybe this secret smuggler code I should abide by?”

And, well. It wasn’t like Jensen had anything better to do and if he didn’t want all this effort of saving Jared to be for nothing it might be a good idea to teach the kid something.

“Okay. Ever traded with the Drimse?”

Jared looked at him with wide eyes. “No. Because the Drimse don’t trade with outsiders.”

Jensen grinned. “So become one of them.”

Jared turned to Jensen, arranged himself in a cross-legged position and looked at him expectantly. “Okay. Tell me how you become an honorary Drimse.”

And Jensen did.

 

Jensen estimated that it was about three hours later when Rallah’s minions came to fetch them. He had entertained Jared for a good chunk of the time but the kid had also told some stories of his own. They had both studiously avoided mentioning anything about their origins and since Jared was so curious about everything else, Jensen had a feeling he didn’t want to invite feelings about his past, the mysterious slaughter of his parents aside.

When they reached Rallah’s hall, Jared’s crew was chained and lined up along the wall.  Rallah herself was standing in front of her stone throne which Jensen had never actually seen her sit on.

She waved her three fingered hands at Jensen in greeting. “Rallah apologizes for the late hour. Rallah had to take another meeting. But maybe you didn’t mind.”

Jensen gave her a filthy grin. “Not at all.”

There were hisses and angry sounds from Jared’s crew but Jensen ignored it.

Rallah made a gurgling sound that Jensen thought might be a laugh.

Jensen bowed. “I thank Rallah for her hospitality and for providing the company for the  night.”

“You are welcome.” She leaned forward. “Did you enjoy it?”

“Very much,” Jensen said.

More angry noises from Jared’s crew.

“Really?” Rallah sad. “Rallah didn’t hear any screaming.”

Fuck. Jensen nodded sagely. “It is a sign of a good human mate if they don’t make a sound.”

“Or maybe you didn’t do it right,” Rallah said dubiously.

Internally, Jensen apologized, then he took the two steps to Jared, and yanked at the blanket. It slid off Jared’s shoulders, revealing his upper body down to his sternum and the tip of the tattoo on his back.

“You fucking bastard,” Gen yelled before one of Rallah’s minions whacked her over the head and she fell silent.

Jensen could see where the anger came from. In the hours they had waited for Rallah to summon them, the bruises on Jared’s body had started morphing from red to purple, the scratch marks had risen to angry red welts, and the bite mark on his shoulder was an unmistakable evidence of applied force.

Rallah hummed and Jared winced. “Well, then Rallah is glad Rallah paid her dues.”

“Rallah did,” Jensen said with a deep bow. “If I may.”

Rallah gave an encouraging wave with her long fingers.

“Since we had such an amicable trade yesterday, would Rallah be inclined towards another trade?”

“Rallah is always inclined for good trade. What do you have in mind?”

“I was wondering if you would be willing to part with this human,” Jensen said and pointed at Jared.

Rallah hissed through her teeth. “Rallah has told you that he has to stay and pay his dues. How dare you question Rallah’s word!”

“I understand,” Jensen said placatingly. “And I would never have asked this imprudent question if it were not for certain circumstances.”

“What circumstances?” Rallah was still hissing.

“Well,” Jensen said and cleared his throat. “Our procreating last night was very… successful.”

It was a gamble. Maybe Rallah did know about human reproduction, maybe she did not. Jensen kept his phrasing vague on purpose.

“Really?” Rallah asked. “Rallah is curious, how do you know?”

Jensen wanted to sigh in relief, instead he pointed at Jared. “The bruising. It is _very_ distinct.”

Rallah pursed her lips, then interlaced her fingers. “So, Jensen Ironheart. What is this human worth to you now?”

“I hear Rallah is in the business for Sicaryan artifacts. I picked up four crates and was planning on getting an associate to broker a sale but maybe we could come to an agreement?”

Rallah tilted her head and was quiet for a time.

“Rallah is amendable,” she finally said. “Under one condition.”

“Yes?” Jensen didn’t dare breathe. Next to him he could almost feel Jared vibrate with anticipation.

“You will name your firstborn after Rallah.”

“Done,” Jensen said, biting his cheek to keep any inappropriate noise from spilling out.

“And after you kill him, you will send me his head.”

Jensen opened his mouth, then closed it again. “We don’t kill our partners,” he finally said.

“But when they are not useful any longer?”

“He is very young,” Jensen said, fighting to keep an even face. “I can use him to procreate for many more years.”

“Ah, Rallah understands,” Rallah said sagely. “Rallah would still tear the flesh from his bones, but Rallah can see your human teeth are not made for that.”

Next to him, Jared made an aborted sound and Jensen hastily took the chain.

“I will take him with me and maybe his people can help me get the crates down to Rallah.”

“Of course.” Rallah nodded graciously. “You can keep them too, if you want. Rallah has no use for them.”

Excellent. Exactly what they had hoped for. To keep up the charade, Jensen still shot Jared’s crew a dubious look. “I’m not sure if they can be useful but maybe my crew would like to use them to procreate.”

“Otherwise you can sell them,” Rallah said offhandedly.

Jensen froze. He had a reputation in the business. Rallah might know.

“I don’t usually sell live cargo,” Jensen said. “But I’ll see what my crew says. I am certainly most grateful to Rallah for gifting me this human.”

Rallah waved at him graciously. “Rallah always enjoys doing business with Jensen Ironheart.”

And with that, Jensen tugged on Jared’s chain and dragged him out of the hall. Jared had wrapped the blanket around his chest and tucked it under his armpits, Jensen’s handiwork prominently on display. The minions followed, herding Jared’s crew with them and in absolute silence they walked outside to meet up with Jensen's people.

“I have traded our Sicaryan artifacts for this human after our successful procreation,” Jensen announced in a voice that he hoped sounded both like he was explaining the most natural thing in the world and also brooked no argument.

His crew stared at him, bug-eyed, and when Chris opened his mouth, Jensen quickly cut him off.

“Rallah also gave us his crew for you to procreate with, and they can help deliver the goods to Rallah. And we don’t want to make Rallah wait, do we?”

Misha’s ears twitched once and he let out a high chirp.

“Yes,” Dani said with a strained voice, her mouth twitching. “Congratulations are in order.” She nodded at Jared, then turned to his crew. “Follow me.”

The minions unbound them but pointed their weapons at Jared. “Rallah trust. Minions don’t. He stay.”

Jensen nodded. “Of course. But then I’ll stay with him until my people are back with the _four_ crates of the artifacts. Make sure it’s the whole shipment,” he added and shot Chris a look.

“You got it, Captain,” Chris said. He never addressed Jensen in a formal way and Jensen’s official title had become a codeword of sorts, Chris acknowledging Jensen’s unspoken and hidden orders.

“Gen,” Jared said, “make sure Chad is okay.”

Gen’s eyes widened for a second, then her expression smoothed out again. “Of course.”

Jensen caught Misha’s eyes, jerked his head in Gen’s direction and made a chirping sound. Judging by Misha’s full body shrug Jensen’s pronunciation was still horrible but right now, they couldn't be picky.

When Felicia walked past Jensen she grumbled, “Don’t think I forgot that these yahoos blew up the 8-15…”

“Not now!” Jensen hissed.

She shot him a sullen look and gave Jared the stink eye, then she followed the others.

When their crews had left, Jared and Jensen stood in silence, surrounded by Rallah’s minions. Jensen couldn’t think of any inconsequential small talk and they still weren’t out of here. If Jared was still trying to pull one over on him and their two crews got in a fight...

“It’s unbelievable, how reckless you are,” Jensen said quietly.

“Hey, I learned my lesson,” Jared replied. “No more renegotiating.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Jensen hissed. “If our people get into a fight, we’re stuck down here.”

“Why would they get into a fight?” Jared’s face was nothing but honest confusion. Jensen didn’t buy it for a second.

“What’s a Chad?” Jensen asked.

“Chad is…. he’s of the 'you gotta see it to believe it' variety.” Jared gave Jensen an apologetic smile. “Gen just needs to keep an eye on him. I promise—” Jared shot the minions a look, “—everything will be okay.”

“It better be,” Jensen said and pulled on Jared’s chain, enough to make him feel it, “because you’re mine now.”

Jared simpered. “Nowhere else I’d rather be.”

Oh yeah, Jensen would need to stay sharp. Jared definitely had a play.  

Jensen’s people came back soon enough that Jensen knew everything had probably gone well. Rallah’s minions inspected the crates and then they were free to go.

To keep up the facade, Jensen herded Jared and his crew onto the 8-15’s shuttle, chain and all. When the door closed behind them, Jared turned to him.

“In nine months, we should send Rallah some baby pictures.”

And then he broke out laughing.

Up in space, the 8-15 was hovering next to Jared’s ship.

Jensen personally made sure that the crates held the artifacts Jared had promised before he gave him the key to Rallah’s shackle.

“I’d say that makes us even,” he said. “Truce?”

“I saved your ass, you saved mine,” Jared said. “Truce.”

_A life for a life._

Jensen nodded.

Jared made a move in his direction, then he stopped. “Well, it’s always fun running into you. Maybe our paths will cross again.”

“Considering that either a ship gets blown up or we’re in mortal danger, maybe not.”

Jared grinned. “I don’t know. It’s kind of fun.”

Jensen rolled his eyes. Then he said, “Take care of yourself. And the baby.”

Jared laughed again, then boarded his own ship.

Jensen and his crew stood at the door and watched Jared’s ship fly away.

Misha swerved his ears and chirped.

“Shut up,” Jensen said.

“I don’t know,” Chris said. “I can see it. Daddy Jensen.”

Jensen hit him upside the head. “Shut up and help me check the shipment.”

Dani and Felicia’s laughter followed them all the way to the cargo room.

It took him three sweeps through the crates and he almost started believing that Jared had made an honest deal with him when one of the vases he shook rattled. Chris had been yapping at him to let it go after the first sweep but now he looked up curiously from the disk he’d been fiddling with. Jensen turned  the vase over and shook until a small tracker fell out.

“Well, well, what do we do with that?” Chris asked.

Jensen grinned. “Stick it to the next ship we pass and give Jared something else to chase after.”

“Excellent work,” Chris said and got up. Then he looked at Jensen earnestly. “You know if you and Jared would put all this energy towards something positive… I know we joke a lot but—”

“Don’t,” Jensen said. Chris had tried to put him on the path of true love before, as he called it. Jensen wasn’t interested.

There had been a time in his life when he’d thought he’d find someone to share his life with, to come home to after the battle, to raise a child with, to pass on the family’s legacy. He didn’t want to dwell on the past.

When he was in the solitude of his cabin, he remembered the way Jared’s skin had tasted.

Jensen sighed and reached for a bottle of shine.

 

 

  


**Jensen NOW**

 

The next morning, Jensen woke with Jared plastered to his side. Of course.

His arm was asleep again and Jared’s breath was warm on his shoulder. It felt—nice. Comforting. And for a moment, Jensen couldn’t stop himself from imagining a relationship with Jared.

Waking up with him every morning. Traveling the universe together, watching the stars, talking deep into the hours of the night, the only sounds the faint engine hum and Misha’s snores which vibrated through the ship’s ventilation system.

But even if Jared would want something longer, the point would come, where he would ask. About Jensen’s past. And he’d figure out that Jensen Ironheart had no honor at all. Jensen wondered if he would mind. Probably not.

Maybe Jared would be satisfied, happy even, with Jensen Ironheart. Jensen wondered if he should try to be too.

Fuck. It was too early to fantasize about impossible shit.

Ungently, he shoved at Jared until he rolled off his arm with an adorable grumble.

“Bastard.”

Jensen suppressed a smile and got up. “Your own fault if you put your heavy ass on my arm.”

“My ass is awesome,” Jared said and wiggled said ass under the thin blanket.

Jensen needed to leave the room before he did something stupid. Like letting Jared see the besotted smile on his face.

 

Parts of their crews were hanging out in the mess when Jensen showed up for breakfast.

Chris immediately pushed his bowl to the side and put his elbows on the table, turning to Jensen. “And?”

Jensen took a bowl and filled it with the porridge standing on the stove.

“And what?”

From across the table, Dani laughed. “That does not sound like a man who got laid the night before.”

Jensen raised his eyebrows. “How about you get your own sex life to worry about?”

Dani looked at Aldis and Gen sitting at the table with them. “What a good suggestion, Captain.”

Aldis rolled his eyes but Gen perked up. Dani winked at her.

Misha trilled and his ears twitched excitedly.

Everyone turned to him, Jared’s crew in curiosity, Jensen’s in shock.

“You what?” Jensen asked.

“How does that even work?” Dani asked.

Misha hooted at her, four of his ears jerking in indignation.

“Of course,” Dani muttered.

That was when Osric came into the room, and they all stared at him.

“What?

“Nothing,” Dani said quickly.

Jensen just laughed.

 

They reached Jim’s junkyard just before dinner.

Jim raised his graying eyebrows when he saw them disembarking the Imp together. He lifted his dark cap and rubbed his short, faded hair.

“Now this is a surprise,” he said in his growly voice.

“You keep underestimating me,” Jared said with a grin.

“That’s really not it,” Jim said and shot Jensen a questioning look.

“I needed a ride,” Jensen said as way of an explanation. “The 8-15 needs a new secondary ignition.

Jim still didn’t look convinced but he started scanning their group. “Well, where’s that spunky mechanic of yours then?”

Felicia came forward with a smile and proceeded to hug Jim who was too surprised to do more than pat her on her back.

“I knew you secretly liked me,” she said triumphantly.

Jim grumbled but didn’t protest. “C’mon, let me show you what I’ve got.”

And with that, they disappeared between Jim’s towers of spaceship parts.

Jared turned to Jensen. “Just a ride? Really?”

“I thought that’d be all you want?” Jensen shot back.

Jared opened his mouth but no sound came out. Then he laughed, full-dimpled. “I don’t know. Depends on how well you do.”

“Get a room,” Dani muttered.

It didn’t take Felicia long to get what they needed.

“I would invite you to stay,” Jim said, “but Speight is stopping by and I don’t want another altercation disrupting my system, you got it?”

“I only hit him a little,” Chris said mulishly.

“He deserved it,” Aldis said at the same time.

Chris and Aldis looked at each other.

“You too?” Aldis asked.

“I hate that little slimeball,” Chris said.

Aldis nodded, then stretched out his fist for Chris to bump.

“We’re leaving,” Jensen said hastily. “Jim, thanks for everything.”

“Yes, thanks so much,” Jared agreed and then they herded their people back to the Imp.

“And where do we get food now?” Gen asked with a pout.

“We still have leftover stew,” Chris said.

Gen and Aldis looked at each other. “We really don’t.”

Misha hooted in agreement.

Jared groaned. “You two are bottomless pits.”

“We can just stop by the Floating Oasis,” Dani suggested. “It should be on our way.”

“Really?” Chad asked.

Dani gave him a look full of disdain, then stood. “I’ll show you the route. We have people to feed.” She shot Gen a lingering look, then sashayed out of the room towards the cockpit. Grumbling, Chad followed.

“Come on,” Jared said to Jensen. “I’ve got something to show you.”

Curiously, Jensen followed Jared. They ended up back in Jared’s cabin.

“That was a really cheap line.”

Jared grinned. “While I can totally see why you’d think that, you should never assume that I’m predictable.” Jared climbed up on his desk, then pushed one of the ceiling panels to the side and fished a box out of the opening.

Back on the ground he put it before Jensen on the table and gestured for him to open it.

“What is it?”

“Oh stars, just look. It’s like you’ve never gotten a gift before.” Jared threw up his hands in agitation.

“I have,” Jensen said. “I just didn’t expect one from you.”

Jared gave him a smug smile.

Jensen opened the box. He didn’t know what he’d expected but certainly not an exquisitely worked dagger. The slightly curved metallic blade gave off a slight bluish glow and the black handle was covered in a smooth material, not unlike the leather Jensen’s people used. Meandering patterns that would help with grip decorated the handle.

Slowly, Jensen reached for it. It was perfectly balanced and lay in his hand as if it was made for him. It was a weapon froged for battle.

“Where did you get this?” he asked, still examining the dagger. The blade was razor sharp.

“On Defurion.”

“This is not a Defurionan blade.”

“It’s not. It was in the house of a collector. She gave it to me, said it was a blade made for the fight and she couldn’t bear its thirst for blood in her house.”

Jensen looked up at Jared who just shrugged. “I can fight but I’m not a warrior.”

“So you thought of me.”

“I saw you,” Jared said quietly. “I don’t know what happened to you and I’m not going to ask either, but of all the people I know, this weapon belongs with you.”

It did feel right in Jensen’s hand. “What do you want for it?”

Jared raised his eyebrows. “You just told me you've gotten gifts before.”

Jensen gave Jared an exasperated look.

Jared laughed, then leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Jensen’s lips, soft and almost chaste. “How about a ride? Destination to be determined.” Jared straightened up. “Just think about it.”

Jensen stood rooted to the spot after Jared left, hand clenching around the dagger and lips tingling until the Imp swerved and Chad announced over the speakers that they’d reached their destination.

Fuck. He needed to get his shit together. Carefully, he slid the dagger into one of the thickly lined inside pockets of his jacket. He tended to wear clothes easily outfittable with weapons, and today was no exception. The dagger was a perfect fit. After one last look at Jared’s bed, Jensen left the room. And he knew that he would think about it.

 

The Floating Oasis was cluttered and brightly lit but Traci, the woman behind the bar, knew both Jared and Jensen and they got a table, a round of drinks and a pot of stew with an extra serving of bread in record time.

After the meal, most of their crew members got up to go to the gambling hall two buildings over, except for Aldis and Dani who went to search for buyers for the Nivonir amulet; only Jared and Jensen ordered another drink. Chad also stayed behind, apparently waiting for someone.

“Uh-oh.”

Jensen looked over to see Chad staring towards the entrance.

“What?” Jared asked.

Jensen followed Chad’s line of sight and saw three tall humanoids enter the bar. Their skin was wrinkled and a dirty orange color. Their features were bulky, while their bodies were covered in corded muscles. Xerontas. Vicious fighters.

“Kusha and his people just showed up.”

“Shit.” Jared’s hand went to his gun.

“Who’s Kusha?” Jensen asked, “and how did you piss him off?”

“Rival smuggler,” Chad said and leaned over. “So Jared told me you’re pretty handy in a fight. If you help us out, we’re much more likely to make it back to your ship, just saying.”

Jensen gave Jared an exasperated look. “I need to save you again?”

“Hey, I just dragged you out of a ditch,” Jared said testily. “And we’re perfectly able to handle Kusha on our own, it’s just gonna be easier with your help.”

There was something in Jensen that wanted this fight. He’d always enjoyed it, the physical exertion, and the thought of these three imposing flesh mountains going after Jared made his stomach tighten in anger. Besides, he’d love to try out his new dagger.

The decision was taken out of his hands when one of the Xerontas turned their head and spotted them.

“Here we go,” Chad said and pulled his gun under the table.

“Padalecki,” Kusha snarled and stomped over.

Jared was the picture of calm but, like Chad, he also covertly pulled his weapon.

Jensen reached down to his belt and pressed the button on his beacon. He could probably use backup on this.

“Kusha,” Jared said amicably but with a glint in his eyes. “It’s really not been long enough.”

“Do you have to goad them?” Jensen asked under his breath.

“It’s no fun otherwise,” Jared whispered back, then grinned brightly. “You guys look… I want to say good but that’s not really fitting. Well fed, maybe?”

Kusha snarled. ”We would be better fed if you hadn't taken the Rhashku gold right from under our noses.”

“Oh, that was you eating our dirt?” Jared asked, eyes wide in fake innocence. “Chad, did you notice Kusha and his crew?”

Chad shook his head. “Too far away to ping our sonar I guess.”

Kusha slammed his giant fist on the table. “You owe me shims, Padalecki. That job was mine!”

Jared pulled a regretful face. “We got it, we delivered it.”

“Because you spied on us!”

“It’s not my fault that you talk really loudly when you’re out drinking.”

Kusha roared and pulled a long, serrated knife from his belt. Without warning, he swung it.

Jensen jumped from his seat and pulled his dagger to catch the knife. Their blades collided with a ringing sound and Jensen’s muscles strained under the force of Kusha’s blow.

“It’s time for you to walk away,” he said calmly.

Kusha’s small gray eyes focused on him. “And who might you be?”

“They call me Jensen Ironheart.”

A murmur went through the bar. He hadn’t been aware that it had gone quiet, but the muttering was loud in the silent room.

Kusha’s smile was full of teeth. “Let’s find out if that’s true,” he said, pulled his arm back and then swung his knife towards Jensen’s chest.

Jensen blocked the blow and then jumped on the table to gain some height.

“A little backup?” he yelled over his shoulder in Jared’s and Chad’s general direction when Kusha’s friends advanced on him.

Behind him, he heard Chad and Jared fire and then the doors of the bar burst open and Chris and Felicia stormed in, weapons drawn. The other patrons of the bar got out of the way and started placing bets, though a few also looked like they wanted to get involved. Jensen parried Kusha’s blows but Kusha just gripped Jensen’s arm, and threw him across the room and into a group of traders. His whole body shook and hurt when he collided with the table, jarring his sore shoulder sharply. Oh, that was it.

Jensen got up and broke off one of the table’s legs, pointing it at Kusha. “That was a mistake.

Kusha bared his teeth and roared. The bar erupted into pandemonium.

In the chaos, Jensen held the table leg like a club, slogging Kusha in the legs and when he stumbled, over the head. His thick skin seemed to be impenetrable by bullets, but with the help of about half the bar's furniture and the sharp blade of the dagger Jensen finally managed to bring him down. Thankfully, his people and Jared’s had managed to take care of Kusha’s two cronies.

When Kusha collapsed in a heap of limp muscles at his feet, breathing heavily through a broken nose, Jensen turned to Jared who watched him carefully.

He walked over to Jensen, carelessly stepping over Kusha’s body. “You okay?” he asked quietly.

Jensen knew why Jared was asking, but he was fine. This was fine. He gave him an easy grin and twirled the club and the dagger in his hands. “Of course.”

Jared rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything. Jensen appreciated that. He wouldn't have thought it in the beginning, but Jared actually knew when to shut up.

 

  


**Jared + Jensen THEN**

 

“This is all your fault,” Jensen ground out.

“Would you please shut up, I’m trying to concentrate,” Jared shot back.

Behind him, Jared was wiggling around but Jensen had already tried to get out of the chains and there was no way. They were shackled back to back to a pole in the middle of a grassy plain. Maybe they could turn and climb the pole somehow. In the distance, Jensen could see the mountain range. It should have been a simple job, a smash and grab really. But no, Jared had to be here too. Of course he had.

While they had argued over who got to walk away with the crown that contained several of the rare singing crystals, the owners had shown up.

Jensen had made sure his crew got out of there first, and apparently so had Jared, because when the giant, heavy net had entrapped them, they were the only ones left.

Jensen was really hoping his crew was coming to get them soon; he’d even settle for Jared’s because right now they were tied up as an offering for one of the giant steppe dwellers. Jensen had only seen the necklaces made out of their teeth and he had no desire to meet one of them up close.

“Fuck.”

Jensen felt Jared slump against him.

“What?”

Jared sighed. “Can you reach my ass?”

“Are you serious?”

“Oh my stars, you—I have a lock pick in my back pocket.”

And well. With Jared’s constant flirting at every inopportune moment, Jensen felt like he couldn’t be blamed. Nevertheless, he reached back and tried to wiggle his fingers into Jared’s pocket. He tried to ignore how round and firm Jared’s ass was, instead focused on the slight bulge of the lock pick set and extracting it without dropping it.

It was difficult because the ground had started shaking.

“Jensen, if you ever want a chance to name a kid after Rallah, you should really hurry the fuck up.”

“Not helping,” Jensen grit out through his teeth.

“I don’t know, I think it’s a pretty good incentive. Maybe people will think Rallah is the godmother, that would really bolster the kid’s reputation.”

“Jared, shut up!”

Jensen finally got the lockpick out of Jared’s pants and pressed it into Jared’s hands. He wasn’t familiar with the device; Jared would be quicker.

“Now get us out of here.”

It didn’t take Jared longer than a few seconds but Jensen had no time to be impressed because the ground was shaking pretty badly, and then a giant animal came into view, running straight for them.

It came galloping on three legs, two slim, long-clawed ones in the front, and one big, stump-like one in the back. The head was just a big jaw with long, uneven teeth, ringed with horns and thin tentacles that might be feelers. It wasn’t big enough to swallow either of them whole, but with those teeth, that wouldn’t be a problem.

Jared ran towards the row of poles with pointy tips where the planet dwellers had impaled whatever this beast had left of the previous victims. He pulled one out of the ground and dislodged what looked like a humanoid torso and pointed the tip towards the beast. It made for a decent spiked staff.

“A little help?” he shouted towards Jensen but then the beast was upon them. Jensen jumped to the side, rolling away, and the beast turned towards Jared instead.

He wasn’t bad with the staff, maybe even had some training judging from the way he was holding it, but Jensen already knew it wouldn’t be enough.

He looked at the poles. The polearm, a series of bladed staffs, was the weapon of his people, the first weapon Jensen had yielded, the one he’d been most proficient with. After his banishment, he’d used every weapon known in the universe—except for a polearm. He knew he needed to pick one now, he knew he had to fight, but he was frozen in place.

 

_“Go on, pick one.”_

_“How do I know which one is right?” Jensen asked._

_This was the first time his mother had ever talked to him during his training. She’d watched before, but left all the training to Alaina, the former First Warrior of his mother’s army. No one left the training program before they could defeat her in battle. She only had one leg but it took years for the young warriors to make it—and some of them never did._

_Jensen was still years away from asking for his deciding fight but today, his mother had come in, followed by a soldier rolling in a rack with polearms. And Jensen was supposed to pick._

_“It’s the one that’ll feel right in your hands,” his mother said. “Go on, try them out.”_

_Jensen knew that he needed to choose carefully._

_He eyed the poles and mentally culled the ones that looked too long or too short, too heavy or too light. He disregarded the flashy ones, decorated with carvings and stones, because their blades were too thin or too weak._

_He was about to reach for a polished staff with a sharp blade on top when he noticed one made out of an ugly, mud-brown wood. The surface was slightly roughed which would give him a better grip and the tip had more ridges than a usual blade. They were ragged but upon closer inspection it was obviously an intentional feature, each sharp edge carefully forged._

_Slowly, Jensen wrapped his hand around the handle. He didn’t dare look to his mother while he pulled the pole from its place._

_It felt good in his hands, balanced. He twirled it once, then faced his mother._

_“Is that your choice?” she asked._

_There was no room for second guessing. “It is.”_

_She nodded and then with all her battle speed she pulled another staff from the rack and swung it at Jensen who just barely managed to block the blow and jump out of the way._

_His mother gave him one of her rare smiles. “Today, you train with me.”_

 

“Jensen! You fucking bastard, are you going to let me die? _Motherfucker_.”

The pain in Jared’s voice sharply pulled Jensen’s attention back his way.

Jared was on the ground, the staff he’d picked lying a few feet away, and he was cradling his arm to his chest. The ocher ground was sprayed with blood. The beast was shaking out a front leg, yellow blood flying from a long gash. It wouldn't be enough to stop it.

Jensen started running.

The beast advanced on Jared who was crawling backwards.

Jensen gripped the closest pole and shook it to dislodge a leathery ball of skin filled with bones. It was too long and too heavy and the balance was shit. He gripped it tighter anyway.

He turned back towards the beast which was almost upon Jared. Jensen sprinted, then slid across the ground until he reached the beast and thrust the staff upwards into the beast’s open maw. It reared back with a pained shriek and Jensen jumped to his feat, sharp end of the staff pointed at it.

Jensen adjusted his hands to get the best grip on the staff and it felt _right_. When the beast advanced on him, his arms and legs moved without conscious thought.

Thrust, parry, jump, turn, duck, swing, hit.

His body remembered every sequence, how much force to put behind every move. He evaded the teeth, back far enough to remain unscathed but close enough to still injure the beast.

It was a dance and he hadn’t forgotten a single step. He fought the enemy, for victory and for protection of his people.

He got lost in it, didn’t have to think, just had to sense. The whooshing of a claw slicing through the air over his head, the sound of the clashing teeth, the vibrations of every step the beast took. And when the opening came, Jensen drove the blade deep into the beast’s neck.

It screeched in pain before it wobbled and fell to the ground with an earth shaking thud.

For a moment, pride and satisfaction welled in Jensen. Victory was his. He’d defeated the monster, he’d saved Jared—he stopped. It wasn’t the same. It didn’t mean the same. It meant survival, not honor. There was no honor for Jensen.

When he turned around, Jared was watching him with wide eyes.

“Don’t.” Jensen’s voice came out raspy. “Not now.”

For the first time since he’d known him, Jared actually listened and shut his mouth.

Jensen turned back to the animal. It would have been a worthy adversary, even to Jensen’s people. In another life, he’d have been lauded, celebrated. His mother would have added another stone to his bracelets.

Jensen gripped his left wrist to combat the phantom ache.

He startled when Jared’s hand settled on his shoulder.

“Whatever happened to you,” Jared said slowly, “I just want to say thank you.”

Jensen turned around and brushed Jared’s hand off. “You don’t need to thank me. I was just saving my own life.”

Jensen wasn’t a protector anymore.

“You could have run,” Jared said softly.

“It would have come after me too,” Jensen said.

There was no solace in the fact that he hadn’t even considered leaving Jared behind. It just meant that Jensen still hadn’t managed to let go.

“If you say so,” Jared said and Jensen glared at him, suddenly furious.

“Yes, I fucking said so.”

Jared raised his palms and looked at Jensen calculatingly. “Fine. I still feel like I owe you for saving my life. _Again_.”

Jensen couldn’t stomach the serious look in Jared’s eyes—Jared always seemed incapable of serious—so he smirked. “What did you have in mind?”

With a huff and a side tilt of his head, Jared made it clear that he knew what Jensen was doing but then he stepped forward and grinned back at him anyway.

“Well, I’m kind of warming towards the idea of dense vegetation.”

Jensen raised an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

“A near-death experience can do that to you,” Jared said but he was keeping his voice light.

For a moment, Jensen thought about it, about dragging Jared off into the bushes, tearing his clothes off, right there, next to his victory, the battlefield.

Fuck. Jensen rubbed a hand over his face. He hadn’t felt this off-kilter in a long time. He realised he was still gripping the staff. He turned away and rammed it into the ground.

He turned back to Jared and reached for him, sliding a hand up his neck and into his hair. But instead of leaning in, Jared gripped Jensen’s wrists, right where his bracelets used to be.

Jensen wanted to pull his hands back but he realized Jared’s touch didn’t feel intrusive. It felt grounding.

“Where do you go off to sometimes?” Jared asked.

“Nowhere.”

“Do you want to go back?”

Jensen huffed. “I can’t.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

“There’s nothing to go back to,” Jensen said because he’d never articulated the answer to this question. He couldn’t. He had no right to even want to go back.

_You are in disgrace._

“When I was a little child, I wanted nothing more than to go back to the world of my parents. Be close to that life we had,” Jared said quietly. “But I couldn’t. And maybe it would have been great. But this new life I have here?” Jared flexed his fingers putting an inescapable pressure on Jensen’s wrist. “That’s pretty awesome too.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“There’s more than one life you can live,” Jared said.

“Not when you’re a dead man.”

“I don’t know,” Jared said and leaned his forehead against Jensen’s, pressed his thumbs against his pulse points. “You feel pretty alive to me.”

Jensen wanted to refute Jared’s claim, wanted to brush it off, but he couldn’t. Jared made him aware of his own heart, still beating fast after the exertion and rush of the fight. His body was still thrumming with adrenaline and ever since Jared had put his hands on him there was something else too.

Jensen didn’t know what to do with this. He’d never sought out relationships, didn’t let people get close. Even his own crew only knew bits and pieces of his past. But from the start, Jared had been an annoying, nagging presence in the corner of Jensen’s mind and he couldn’t get him out.

Looking into Jared’s eyes, Jensen wondered, for the first time, if he could make a real life for himself. If he could not be Jensen Arros Ackles, if he could be Jensen Ironheart. He had no right to go back to his own life; he was in disgrace, but maybe he could have something new.

_You’re in disgrace. You brought dishonor on our family._

Jensen didn’t know how to have a life worth living without honor.

The familiar whooshing of the 8-15’s engine ripped through the steppe’s silence and Jensen pulled back the same moment Jared did.

“I guess we should get out of here,” Jared said and Jensen saw that his own ship was arriving on the other side of the field.

Jensen nodded.

“Truce?” Jared offered.

It wasn’t the first time he’d proposed it, but this time it sounded heavy and meaningful and Jensen couldn't bear it.

“You begging?” he asked.

Jared snorted. “You wish.”

Jensen grinned. “We’ll see about that next time.”

“I’ll hold you to it.”

And when Jensen checked his belts and pockets back on the ship, the small single crystals he’d managed to pocket were still there.

He didn’t know what to do with that. He didn’t know what to do with anything that had happened today, so he joined Dani in the cockpit. Watching the vastness of space gliding past, distant stars illuminating the darkness, always calmed him. It was something he could only experience out there, something that had no connection to his old life. It felt like peace.

 

 

**Jensen NOW**

 

Back on the Imp, everyone cleaned up and then headed to bed. Aldis and Dani had actually sold the amulet for a pretty good price and they divvied up the money quickly. Afterwards, only Dani and Gen stayed in the mess for a drink.

“Thank you,” Jensen said to Jared when they were alone in Jared’s room. He sat down on the bed to clean the dagger. “It’s a beautiful weapon.”

Jared grinned lightly. “Wait, is the famous Jensen Ironheart stalling?”

“Stalling?”

Slowly, Jared approached Jensen. “I asked you to think about it. And now you’re sitting on my bed, very methodically cleaning a dagger.”

And Jensen couldn’t say no anymore. He didn’t know how this could work, didn’t know if he even could make something like this work. And Jared was a little shit. A smart, cunning, brave little shit who challenged him at every turn, who hid his big heart under constant flirting and who got Jensen in the most unexpected ways.

Purposefully, Jensen put the dagger down. “I wasn’t stalling. I was thinking. As per your instruction.”

Jared crossed the short distance to Jensen and he didn’t stop, just straddled Jensen's lap and ran his hands over his shoulders. “So, what do you think?”

It was hard to think with Jared suddenly so close, so many places of contact, and the challenge lighting his eyes.

Jensen reached up, until his hands were buried deep in Jared’s hair. “We’re not naming our firstborn Rallah.”

Jared laughed, dimples in both cheeks and Jensen couldn't help but pull him down, kiss the laughter from his lips until Jared groaned and pushed himself forward.

They kissed hungrily and yanked off their shirts, tore open their pants and Jensen couldn't wait to get his hands on Jared’s ass. It had starred in more fantasies that he cared to admit.

“Bedside drawer,” Jared bit out.

When Jensen didn’t react because he couldn’t tear himself from Jared’s mouth, Jared playfully bit his lip and then leaned over, stretching his body into a long, graceful arch, muscles playing under his skin. Jensen couldn’t stop his hands from exploring but when Jared put a little metallic vial into his hands, he had another purpose.

He opened Jared up slowly, ignoring the bitten-out orders to 'hurry, more, faster' that Jared kissed into Jensen’s skin. But Jensen was going to take his time.

“Oh stars, this is you taking revenge, right?” Jared finally breathed against Jensen’s neck. “You’re one mean, vindictive bastard, you know that?”

“And you enjoy every second of it.”

“Fuck yeah.”

Jensen let out a raspy laugh.

“Okay, enough,” Jared finally decided, and his voice would be bossy if he wasn’t so breathless. But for once, Jensen agreed with him.

Torturously slow, Jared raised himself up and then sank down on Jensen’s dick. He stopped about halfway down before raising up again and then he just moved his hips in the smallest movements, head thrown back and apparently enjoying the stretch.

Jensen’s hands dug deeper into Jared’s hips. “Jared.”

“Not yet.”

“You little shit.”

Jared laughed and then sank all the way down. Jensen's head fell back and he had to fight for air. Jared was so fucking hot and tight around him, Jensen’s body went into auto pilot. He needed more.

It took him a moment to get a handle on himself, especially once Jared was riding his dick, muscles in his stomach working and beads of sweat running down his throat. Jensen leaned forward, flicking his tongue out to taste the salt on Jared’s skin.

“Yes.”

But Jared’s pace was still agonizingly slow. So Jensen gripped his waist and spun them around. The pain in his shoulder was only a distant twinge and Jensen was too distracted by Jared’s body laid out in front of him anyway.

He pushed inside again and Jared held him, grounded him, and Jensen leaned down to kiss him.

“Close,” Jared muttered.

“Yeah, come on,” Jensen said.

“Gonna mark me up for real this time?”

“You want me to?”

Jared tilted his head back, presenting the long column of his neck. Jensen leaned in, pressed his mouth against his skin. It wasn’t anything like last time. Last time it was pretense, forced distance to keep an intimate moment from being truly intimate. This time Jensen dragged his mouth along Jared’s skin with intent, traced the shape of him with his tongue and followed the lines of his muscles with his teeth.

Jared didn’t keep still this time, undulating his body, pressing closer against Jensen and dragging his fingers up and down Jensen’s back, leaving his own marks. Shit.

“Come on,” Jensen breathed into Jared’s skin.

He felt Jared reach down, take a hold of himself and move his hand in time with Jensen’s hips.

Jensen was so fucking close, could feel it deep in his toes but he wanted Jared to come first. He sought out Jared’s pulse point and sucked and Jared threw his head back and moaned. Jensen felt him shudder and come between them and he pumped his hips harshly until he fell over the edge too. He collapsed heavily onto Jared’s chest.

Jared let out a breathless little laugh and patted Jensen’s head. “That’s alright, you sleep. You earned it.”

“Little punk,” Jensen muttered and then his eyes fell closed and the last thing he felt was Jared’s breath across his face.

 

When Jensen woke, he was on his back and Jared was curled up against his side again. But the room was warm, they weren’t tangled up in the sheets and there was no imminent danger looming over them. Quietly, Jensen got up to relieve himself. His shoulder and feet were still sore but he had a feeling if he came back to Jared after because he needed one more day in bed to recuperate, Jared would be amenable to keeping him company.

Jensen used Jared’s ensuite bathroom and then paused in the doorway before re-entering the bedroom. Jared had rolled onto his stomach and Jensen appreciatively watched his broad shoulders rise and fall with every breath. The blanket had bunched up between his legs, just a thin stripe haphazardly strewn across his back. Jensen thought he looked like an invitation.

Slowly, Jensen crawled back onto the bed and tugged the blanket down. He froze when the blanket revealed the tattoo between Jared’s shoulder blades. He’d only caught a hint of it before but now that he saw it in its entirety, it made him freeze. The circular formation sat right in the middle of the spine. As if in a trance, Jensen traced the all-too-familiar lines curling and uncurling across Jared’s skin.

Perseverance is key, he’d said.

_We will persevere while you perish._

And Jensen’s people had perished, almost all of them.

The old anger Jensen thought he’d buried long ago violently reared its head. It filled him, dark and consuming, and for a moment he wanted nothing more than to dig his fingers into Jared’s skin and rip the tattoo from his body.

“Jensen?” Jared’s sleepy voice pulled him out of his trance. “You have a tattoo kink or what?” He was joking but underneath, his voice was strained.

Abruptly, Jensen yanked his hand back.

“Just curious.” Jensen forced his voice to be light. He needed to think, needed to figure out who Jared was. “This is an interesting tattoo.”

Jared hummed noncommittally.

“What does it mean?” Jensen asked.

“It means family and growth,” Jared said and his voice was quiet. “I’ve had it since I can remember and when I grew, it grew with me.”

“Why?”

“It’s a family thing,” Jared said and now his voice was obviously tense. “Look, I told you my parents died when I was a kid, so I don’t really know.”

Jared’s parents had died when he was a kid, five years old, he’d said. Jared was in his early twenties now, so it had been about eighteen years ago maybe.

Eighteen years since the king and the queen of the Red faction had been murdered and their only heir had disappeared, proclaimed dead, but always rumored to have escaped. The queen’s brother had taken over, forming a tenuous alliance with Jensen’s people only to betray them and bring Jensen’s people to the brink of extinction. He ruled the Red faction, but since Jared was alive, he was the rightful heir.

Jensen felt numb. He didn't know what to say, what to do. Jared was the lost Red Prince.

Jensen reached for the tattoo, the brand of Jared’s and Jensen’s horrible past.

Then the door banged open and Chad barged in. “Jay, you need to tell that fucking redhead that she can’t—oh. Sorry about that.” He grinned. “It can wait.” In the door he turned around. “But make it a quickie because I’m done arguing and I’m gonna start throwing my tools at her soon.”

The door closed behind him with a loud bang.

“I apologize for Chad,” Jared said and finally rolled onto his back, looking up at Jensen earnestly. “Profusely.”

Jensen clenched and unclenched his fists. “Well, for the sake of avoiding bloodshed, we should probably see what’s up.”

Jared pouted but then sighed in acquiescence. Mechanically, Jensen put on pants, a shirt and his boots. But he couldn’t focus on anything, couldn’t even appreciate Jared completely naked bending over to retrieve his own clothes from the floor. Jared was the Red Prince.

How had he not recognized him? Now that he knew, the royal features were obvious. The eyes, the nose, Jared was a spitting image of the Red faction’s royalty.

Jensen followed Jared out to the mess, and he went through the motions but the entire time he listened to Felicia and Chad argue about supplies, he couldn’t really pay attention.

He was dead, in exile. And here with him was the Red Prince. To bring him home might cleanse his shame, restore him from disgrace.

And then Jared came over and leaned into him. “Do you think they’ll ever get along?”

“Do they need to?” Jensen asked reflexively.

“I don’t know,” Jared said and his eyes were sincere, startling in its rarity. “Do they?”

The world came to a screeching halt.

 

  
  


**Jensen THEN**

Jensen ran faster than he’d ever run before in his life. Behind him, he heard Alona panting harshly, heard his soldiers’ feet stomp on the forest ground, heard twigs and leaves breaking loudly under their feet, but that didn’t matter. The time for stealth was over.

In the distance he could see the forest becoming brighter, more light streaming in through the gaps in the dense canopy before the trees would give way to the field in front of the city.

He pushed forward, ignored his burning lungs and the strain in his legs.

The light changed and, behind the trees, he could see the red sky. It was too early for the sun to rise.

Jensen let out an angry shout and kept running.

When he hit the treeline and saw the flames consuming his city, he pushed on. His family, his friends, his people. He couldn’t let them die. He needed to save them.

And then he would bring death unto the Blue faction.

“This is your fault.” His mother’s voice was rough from the smoke. Her eyes were flat and dark as she stared Jensen down.

He shook his head. “I made a deal with David. We split our forces. And just this morning, I managed to take the Blue faction’s weapons storage. That was an important victory. Our warriors can’t fight without weapons. David and his Red army were supposed to attack them at the northern front. The Blue forces were never supposed to be here.”

His mother’s expression turned to rage. “David? The Red King? How could you trust him? You know the Red faction has no honor! And instead of an honorable battle you _steal_ the enemy’s weapons!”

“It was a good deal for both of us,” Jensen said. “And you know as well as I do that we can’t win this war on our own. Or without new weapons. If I hadn’t made this deal, the city would have burned anyway. And rest assured, I will make David pay.”

“You will do nothing!”

Then his mother raised her hands to hide her face. Jensen didn’t know how long he stood like that, staring at the backs of his mother’s hands, at the broad leather bands with the dark green stones ringing her wrists.

It was long enough for his feelings to settle, for the confusion and the pain and the anger and the disbelief to blend into one dark ball of fury. The deal with the Red King had been a long shot. Jensen had known, but there had been no time. He wouldn't have been able to defend the city because the royal couple had mismanaged the army’s resources for years. The war had started the same year Jensen had received the first stone for his wrist bands, just after his initiation as a warrior of his faction.

He’d never thought he’d inherit the war from his mother but during the last few years it had become obvious that until something changed, until _they_ changed, the war would end with them destroyed. So Jensen had taken greater risks, had gotten more disgraceful scars but against all odds, he’d held the line. But to end the war, they needed more. Jensen hadn’t told his mother, couldn’t have gotten her approval without showing her a success, but now he’d failed. The new generation had put their faith in him, the General’s only child, poised to take over and lead their army to glorious victory, and now he’d failed them, had brought shame to them. Next to him, Alona, his second in command, was standing with her head bowed, hiding her face behind her long blond hair. All his previous victories meant nothing in the face of this defeat.

No one in the clearing moved, no one made a sound. They all waited for the General to make a decision. When she raised her hands, her expression was cold, her eyes empty.

Jensen was frozen. No.

“Today, you have brought dishonor on our house,” his mother said, her voice emotionless but carrying wide, across the entire field, for everyone to hear.

“The Ackles have served the Royal House as generals for generations, the leadership passed from parent to child.” She didn’t look at Jensen. “I had wished to do the same but I don’t have a child anymore.”

She fixed her bright green eyes on Jensen. “I have never been so ashamed in my life to raise a son who would make a deal with the enemy. I will go beg the Royal House for forgiveness.”

“But Mother,” Jensen started, “let me—”

“No!” Her eyes sparked furiously. “You don’t get to call me that anymore; you are not my son. You are no longer part of my family; you have no place among our ancestors.”

She took the three steps that separated them, and reached for him. Out of reflex, Jensen stretched out his arms in front of him, palms down.

In mounting horror, he watched as his mother unfastened the two broad leather bands around his wrists, their stones signifying his place in their family as her heir, in their faction, his achievements, his entire life from the moment he returned from his initiation quest, bloody but victorious. His mother stripped him of everything. She stripped him of his life.

“You are Jensen now,“ General Arlinna Jeross Ackles of the Green House said. “You are in disgrace, from now until the end of time.” She held up his bracelets, his life. “I will bury you, and mourn the boy I gave birth to.”

She stared into his eyes and Jensen couldn’t look away. Even if there was nothing other than anger and disdain in his mother’s eyes, he knew this would be the last time she’d look at him.

“You will leave,” she said, “this planet.”

A murmur went through the crowd. Banishments weren’t unusual, but to send someone off-planet, out into the universe they’d long turned away from, that they didn’t understand and that didn’t understand them, it was worse than death.

“You have one day.” Then she turned around and walked away.

Slowly, the people followed her. They walked past Jensen, ignoring his presence like he was already gone. His family, his friends, his soldiers, no one chanced even a look. Even Alona, his lieutenant, kept her eyes down. A tear was rolling down her cheek. He was already dead to them. Tonight, they’d burn the bracelets and sing the songs of a life taken before it could become part of the family. And then no one would ever speak of him again.

Jensen balled his hands to fists to keep them from shaking and immediately missed the feeling of the shifting leather around his wrists. He felt naked.

He kept standing, unmoving, until they had all left, disappearing behind the next hill with the possessions they had managed to save from the fire.

Then Jensen collapsed to the ground and buried his fingers in the grass, digging them deep into the soft soil. He couldn’t imagine living anywhere else, and yet, he’d have no choice **.**

Jensen let out a half-sob, half-snort. Death was not an option. He might be in disgrace, dead to his family, but he’d bear his punishment. He had no honor anymore, but he still had his dignity. He got himself upright and turned north.

The Red King had betrayed him. The Blue faction had destroyed his city. Jensen had one day to get off planet before his people would kill him on sight. Just enough time to avenge his people and punish the man who’d taken his life. It would be the last time he’d honor his people, the last time he’d honor their customs. Jensen checked his weapons, then he started walking. He had many lives to take tonight. And in the morning he would somehow have to find a way to keep living himself. Because now he was a man without honor. A dead man.

 

 


	2. Jared

 

 

**Jared NOW**

 

Jared had never thought he’d die like this—fucking up a job and dragging his crew with him to go down bloody on his home planet, the one fucking place he’d never wanted to return to.

“Jared, come on, give me your hand!” Gen was yelling against the sound of the shuttle’s engine, her long hair fluttering wildly in the wind. She was stretching out her hand and Jared would just need to reach out and take it and let her pull him aboard.

But the gate was closing, and they’d never make it. They’d have to land the shuttle again and then the Blue warriors would slaughter them.

“We can make it!” Gen shouted but Jared knew that for once in his life he wasn’t going to get his way.

“Aldis!” Jared yelled. “Get her inside!”

Aldis had appeared behind Gen. His expression was grim, the white lines on his skin brighter than usual but he nodded.

“No!” Gen yelled desperately. “Jared, you asshole, no!”

Jared grinned at her. “Love you too.”

And then, Jared let go. He fell, landed hard on the ground and rolled over the wooden floor. Above him he could hear Gen scream every profanity under the stars but Jared couldn’t listen. He sprinted over to the control panel and hit the button for the gate, stopping it from closing.

Jared touched his comm piece. “Chad, take care of the Imp.”

“We’ll come back for you,” Chad said fiercely.

“No, you won’t—and that’s an order. Chad, do you copy?”

But the shuttle was out of the gate and their connection broke off. He heard the warriors closing in around him but all he could see was Gen still kneeling at the shuttle’s open hatch, her hair a wild tangle in the wind.

 

  
  


Jared THEN

 

_Perseverance._

_Strength. Steadfastness._

_Determination. Tenacity. Persistence._

_Never back down. Never give up. Always go all in._

_Persevere._

 

Jared didn’t know if that was how his parents would have taught it; they hadn’t lived long enough to teach him. All he had was the broad ring of blood gold, the red metal of his people. It was simple, undecorated. And inside, a single word engraved.

_Perseverance._

It had been his mother’s and he’d finally outgrown it. It wouldn’t even fit on his pinky anymore.

“This is not a day for sadness.”

Jared looked up from where he sat cross-legged on a bench in the garden.

Julian was approaching him slowly, leaning heavily on his cane. It had rained that morning and Julian’s leg always got worse in the humidity.

“I’ve been wearing it for as long as I can remember,” Jared said and stared down at the ring in his palm.

“You can still carry it with you wherever you go.”

Jared looked up at Julian. He’d been his teacher ever since Jared had fled Aventine. He was an old man, had always been old to Jared, but in the last few years while Jared had grown tall, Julian had shrunk. Yet his calm voice still held the same authority and his brown eyes were all-seeing and sharp.

“Go?”

Julian sighed. “For someone so smart, you’re very dumb sometimes.”

“Thanks,” Jared muttered.

“You always wanted to leave here. And you were right. This planet is too small for you.”

“You always told me I had to wait before. Does this really make a difference?” Jared held up the ring.

Julian shook his head. “But you’re seventeen; you’d be considered of age.”

 _By our people_ , he didn’t say. Jared didn’t mind. They rarely talked about where they’d come from anymore. There was no point; there was nothing to go back to.

“And I decided that if you made it for a month without doing something stupid, you’d be as ready as you’d ever be,” Julian said dryly. “Congratulations.”

Jared laughed, then he leaned back. “Where do I go?”

“Anywhere,” Julian said. “I have taught you everything I know. I have brought everyone here who I thought could teach you. Now you need to decide what to do with your life.”

Jared looked up to the sky. The sun only shone faintly a few hours every day but there were so many stars nearby, their light outshone the darkness.

“I want to see the galaxy,” Jared said. “Everything. I want to see it.”

Julian fixed him with a piercing stare. “But what do you want to _do_ , Jared? With your life?”

Jared wrinkled his forehead. “Isn’t that doing something? Exploring?”

“But for what _purpose_?”

“ _To gather knowledge, to amass treasure, and cultivate it, is the greatest purpose in life_.” Jared grinned. “You said yourself: Kric Eripke is the greatest philosopher in the galaxy.”

The corners of Julian’s mouth turned down and he looked up to the sky as if it would comfort him. “I’ll see to getting you a ride on a shuttle.”

Jared laughed, then stood. “I’m gonna go pack.”

He clutched his mother’s ring tightly as he walked back to his room.

He snuck out when Julian and the servants were already in bed. He slipped out of the compound easily enough—a handful of sugar covered nuts for the sentinels and they wouldn’t raise the alarm. If Jared wasn’t so sure that no one on this planet knew who he was or who he was hiding from, he’d be worried. As it was, he just followed the winding path through the dense vegetation down to the village.

Soundlessly, he walked along the edge of the town until he reached one of the many gray houses. He scaled the third drainpipe to the left and knocked against one of the many identical windows. He’d knocked on the wrong window a few times in the beginning but now he’d taken this path so often, he was sure he could do it blindfolded. Tonight might be the last time.

He wouldn’t linger. He had to leave. This planet was getting small and he’d spent his entire life reading about the wonders of the universe. Now, he wanted to see them. But he didn’t want to do it alone.

It took awhile for the window to open and Gen poked her head out with a grouchy expression on her face. Even the tangled strands of her long, dark hair seemed to be pointing accusatorily at Jared.

“No.”

“You don’t even know what I want to say,” Jared said smugly and climbed through her window.

Gen crossed her arms over her chest. Her ugly, patchworked nightdress fluttered around her legs like a parody of a royal gown while she stalked after Jared.

“We are not spending another night staking out the caves because you think someone buried a treasure in there and are sure they'll come back to reclaim it.”

“They totally will,” Jared shot back, “but that’s not the point because that’s not why I’m here.”

Gen raised a dark eyebrow.

“This is actually serious,” Jared said.

Gen didn’t move.

Jared sat down on the bed. “Really serious.”

“How serious?”

Jared looked down at his bare hands. “My mom’s ring won’t fit me anymore.”

With swift steps, Gen came over and sat down next to him. “I’m sorry. But you can wear it on a chain around your neck, right?”

Jared nodded. “Julian said it’s not a day to be sad.”

“What is it a day for then?”

“Basically he said it’s time I spread my wings and fly.”

“Jared, that’s awesome!” Gen smiled at him. “You can finally leave this shithole.”

Jared snorted. “This place is hardly a shithole.”

Gen made a throwaway hand motion. “It’s tiny. Nothing is going on here, nothing ever happens.” Her eyes started glinting. “But you get to go! Is Julian giving you the ship?”

Jared shook his head. “He said something about getting me a place on the next transport.”

Gen made a face but then smiled again. “Well, better than nothing!” Her smile turned brittle. “You get to see the world. That’s awesome.”

Jared nodded. “Would be cooler to get to explore it with my own ship though.”

Gen couldn’t keep a derisive snort in. “You’d need a pilot, because, no offense, you’re a terrible flyer. And you need someone to watch your back for when your luck will inevitably run out.”

Jared grinned. “I know.”

For a moment, Gen’s expression stayed judging, then it morphed into confusion before it settled on badly hidden excitement. “What are you saying?”

“Do you really think I’d want to leave without you?” Jared asked.

“Gorhan will have a fit,” Gen whispered. “He already lost two workers this month.”

Jared shrugged. “He shouldn’t be an asshole to his employees. And we’ll be far away by then.”

“And if Julian calls you back?”

“Julian is not my keeper,” Jared said decidedly. “He’s my teacher. And he told me that he’s done teaching me. So, time to leave.”

Slowly, Gen shook her head. “How do we even get out without anyone noticing?”

Jared grinned. “I have a plan.”

Gen rolled her eyes. “Of course you do.”

“So you’re in?”

“Of course I am.”

In the darkness of her bedroom, they smiled at each other like idiots.

 

 

  


**Jared NOW**

 

The Blue warriors mercilessly beat him to the ground before they dragged him off to what Jared in his fuzzy-headed state assumed was their dungeon.

They dropped him unceremoniously onto the ground of a small cell and then slammed the door shut behind him.

Well fuck.

He was going to die on his home planet. If anyone had told him this only a few weeks ago, he’d have laughed at them. Mainly because he'd never thought he’d ever go home again.

Home had always been an abstract concept, between the horrible half-memory of his parents getting murdered and the stories Julian told him. Jared’s home—to him, it was death. Never mind that if his uncle ever found him here, Jared was a dead man. So he’d never wanted to go back there, didn’t even want to think about it.

The few times he did think of the planet he grew up on, something dragged it up—or someone.

Lately, that had been Jensen.

Fuck. Jared had tried not to think about him, especially considering how they'd parted ways, but now that he was about to die he thought he could hardly torture himself more. Unfortunately his brain refused to let him relieve the nights they’d spent together; instead, he was inevitably pulled back to the morning that had ruined it all.

 

  
  


**Jared + Jensen THEN**

 

Jared woke up pleasantly sore. Considering that Jensen had been more than half dead only two days ago, he'd fucked him really good. Unfortunately, now Jared was alone in bed. Then he heard the water running in his bathroom and relaxed. Last night had been pretty spectacular; maybe Jensen would be up for another round.

The door to the ensuite bathroom opened but Jensen didn’t come out. Watching him while he was sleeping? Jared suppressed a smile.

Jensen quietly walked closer and crawled back on the bed. Slowly he pulled the blanket down and touched his fingers between Jared's shoulder blades. Right where his tattoo was. Jared waited for him to move, to do something, but Jensen just slowly, almost methodically, traced the circular lines of the tattoo.

Unease crawled up Jared’s spine. There was no way Jensen could know—no one knew—but he couldn’t shake the feeling of dread superseding his anticipation.

“Jensen?” Jared asked carefully, his voice still sleep-rough. “You have a tattoo kink or what?”

Abruptly, Jensen pulled his hand back.

“Just curious,” Jensen said lightly, but Jared thought he could hear a strain underneath. “This is an interesting tattoo.”

Jared hummed noncommittally.

“What does it mean?” Jensen asked.

“It means family and growth,” Jared said. He always used the same words to describe it, purposefully vague, but it didn’t help shaking the unease. “I’ve had it since I can remember and when I grew, it grew with me.”

“Why?” Jensen’s voice was almost harsh.

“It’s a family thing,” Jared pressed out. “Look, I told you my parents died when I was a kid, so I don’t really know.”

Jensen remained silent but his hand softly brushed over Jared’s skin. Jared breathed a sigh of relief.

“So—”

Then the door banged open and Chad barrelled into the room. “Jay, you need to tell that fucking redhead that she can’t—oh. Sorry about that.” He grinned. “It can wait.” In the door he turned around. “But make it a quickie because I’m done arguing and I’m gonna start throwing my tools at her soon.”

The door closed behind him with another loud bang.

“I apologize for Chad,” Jared said and rolled onto his back, looking up at Jensen with what he hoped was a sincerely apologetic expression. “Profusely.”

Jensen was still gloriously naked and Jared appreciatively watched the strong muscles of his shoulders and arms bunch while he propped himself up on the bed. His skin was covered by a myriad of faint freckles and the occasional white scar, and Jared wanted to explore all of it.

Unfortunately, Jensen’s expression turned sour. “Well, for the sake of avoiding bloodshed, we should probably see what’s up.”

Great. Jared sighed. Cockblocked by his own crew.

Quickly Jared got out of bed but he couldn’t stop himself from bending over exaggeratedly to pick up his clothes. Unfortunately, Jensen didn’t seem too impressed; he was methodically putting on his own clothes which was just a shame. But it was probably for the best; Jared really needed their people to get along.

“Come on then,” he said and walked out of his cabin, Jensen right behind then.

Felicia and Chad were having an argument over the supplies Felicia would need to repair Jensen’s ship—and apparently Chad was unwilling to part with them. It might have something to do with the fact that Felicia had insulted Chad’s turbine construction.

Technically, Osric was supposed to be the mechanic on board the Imp but he stuck to everything to do with computers. If it involved a wrench, Chad did it.

Jensen hung back and watched them argue and Jared followed his lead. They did manage to work it out eventually when Osric got involved.

When they left to change something at the turbine—Felicia wanted to prove she was right and so did Chad—Jared walked over to Jensen who was still standing there, staring after their disappearing crew members.

“Do you think they’ll ever get along?”

“Do they need to?” Jensen asked, looking up at Jared with an unreadable expression.

All of a sudden, the mood shifted and something heavy filled the air.

“I don’t know,” Jared said slowly and held Jensen’s gaze. “Do they?”

Jensen froze. His eyes looked past Jared but Jared had the feeling he wasn’t looking at the wall. Jensen had gone off somewhere, disappeared in his memories. It wasn’t the first time Jared had seen it but the urge to reach out and do… something, was stronger than usual.

“I guess it can’t hurt,” Jensen finally said and turned away. “I gotta talk to Dani.” And with that, he disappeared.

What the fuck?

 

 

**Jared NOW**

 

“Who is he?”

Three warriors were standing in front of the cell door. They were all dressed in the long, dark blue tunics of their faction. Their belts were laden with weapons and broad dark bands across their chest held the sheaths for their giant swords carried on their backs. The warrior in the middle was the one who had spoken. He was the most muscular and had a long, ragged scar down the side of his face.

“Just a thief. He and his people tried to steal the ancient blades,” the warrior to his left answered. He was glaring furiously at Jared with small, beady eyes.

Scar-face stepped closer to the bars. “Just a thief, you say?”

“Yes, commander,” the warrior on the right said with a stern face.

“I don’t know about that…” The scar-faced commander cocked his head. “There’s something about him that’s familiar.”

Jared’s heart started thundering in his chest.

“The nose,” the commander finally settled on. “Imagine it a little longer and pointier. And the eyes of course.” The commander stepped closer and then crouched down so he was level with Jared. “The famous royal eyes. A drop of color of all the other factions: blue, green, amber. Didn’t your family always claim that’s why you’re destined to rule us all?”

Well fuck.

“The King has an illegitimate son?” Beady-eyes asked disbelievingly.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” the commander answered and straightened up. “He’d tout it from the rooftops if he could sire children. But when the old king and queen died, there were rumors. That they never found the little prince’s body.”

“You know,” Jared threw in, “if you wanna hit on me, you don’t have to flatter me. That scar’s working really well for you.”

“Silence!”

“How do we make sure?” Beady-eyes asked.

“There’s one way.”

They opened the cell door. Jared scrambled back. If they found proof… But in the small cell there was nowhere to go. He struggled when they pulled at his shirt, hit the beady eyed warrior in the stomach and broke Stern-face’s nose but eventually they just ripped off his shirt and wrestled him onto his knees.

“I’ll be damned,” Beady-eyes breathed out.

Cold, hard fingers traced Jared’s tattoo. Jared was thrown back to the morning with Jensen—Jensen’s silence, his hand on Jared’s tattoo, his own unease, trying to cover it up with a joke—“You have a tattoo kink?”—and Jensen’s forced casual question.

Jensen had recognized the tattoo as well.

Jared didn't hear what the commander and his men were saying because _Jensen had recognized his tattoo_. Which meant that Jensen was a child of Aventine. And considering how Jensen had reacted, he wasn’t a friend of the Red faction.

 

 

  


**Jared + Jensen THEN**

 

Jared spun his mother’s ring in his hands. He didn’t take it out often, didn’t consider himself a sentimental person, but if Jensen could disappear into his memories, so could Jared. But it didn’t work. His thoughts kept drifting back to Jensen. Jensen who had left, to talk to his crew. Well, leaving wasn’t the right word. He’d practically fled and Jared had never thought he’d see the day when Jensen Ironheart would run away from a conversation.

Well, he guessed it was an answer, too. Jensen might want to fuck Jared but he didn’t seem willing to try for something serious. When Jared had offered Jensen a ride with the possibility of more, he’d really hoped Jensen would go for it.

Jared still wasn't quite sure what exactly had possessed him to consider getting serious with Jensen. They were a flirt, an adventure, a charged encounter Jared looked forward to every time he pulled a job. Except, in the last four turns, he’d actually caught himself looking for Jensen. Ever since the day Jensen had killed that gigantic creature on Hratull. He’d been fearless, elegant, strong and absolute. He’d been a warrior.

Jared wasn’t a bad fighter himself but he’d never seen anything like it. But that wasn’t what had drawn him in. It was the pain in Jensen’s face after the fight. For a moment, he’d stood over the conquered beast, a look of deep contentment on his face. Then it had all fallen apart. Whatever life Jensen had led before which had shaped him into the warrior he was, he hadn’t left it voluntarily. He was in exile, just like Jared.

That unexpected kinship had pushed the door open for something in Jared to grow. To build on every meeting, every touch, every look. And Jared thought he might actually be able to help Jensen. Jared was happy with his life. Jensen should be too.

But Jensen didn’t seem too keen on it. It hurt, deep and unexpected.

 

To distract himself from Jensen’s absence, Jared spend the day planning new jobs with Gen. She knew exactly what was going on but she was kind enough to indulge him.

For dinner, everyone gathered in the mess. Jared didn’t know what to expect.

When Jensen entered, his expression was calm and he took his seat next to Jared. Chris served another one of his tasty stews and everyone dug in. Chad and Felicia were still immersed in a debate about engines but it carried a friendlier tone than it had that morning. Gen was talking quietly with Dani, Aldis and Chris were deep in conversation, and Osric and Misha were laughing together, occasionally chipping in to the mechanics' discussion.

Everyone finally got along, it seemed. Everyone except for Jared and Jensen, and Jared had no fucking clue why. He'd thought they were getting somewhere, starting to trust each other and then Jensen went and shut up like a Grizorian mud clam.

“So,” Jared asked, couldn't stop himself really, “where’ve you been the whole day?”

“I had to plan with Felicia and Dani.”

“And?”

Jensen shrugged. “There are a few things we could do.”

“So you thought about it,” Jared said and he couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice.

“Actually,” Jensen said quietly, “I’m still thinking.”

“Last night not good enough for you?” Jared bit out and hated himself for it immediately afterwards. Fuck, Jensen either brought out the best or the worst in him.

Jensen just raised a pointed eyebrow. “You know very well that last night is not the problem.”

“Then what is?”

“How about everything?” Jensen asked incredulously. “How do we even make this work?”

“I don’t know. But if we decide what we want, we’ll figure it out.” So Jensen was just worried? Jared could deal with that. “Things have a habit of going my way, remember?”

Jensen rolled his eyes.

Jared grinned. “You worry too much.”

Chad slammed a bottle down in front of them. “You’re disgustingly sappy. Drink with us.”

In the background, Jared saw Chris giving Jensen the thumbs-up, whatever that meant.

Jared had thought Jensen would refuse but he reached for the bottle and poured a generous portion into his glass. Well, maybe it would help him to loosen up. Or finally articulate his issues.

Jared pushed his glass over to him. “Me too.”

And Jensen poured. And kept pouring for the rest of the evening.

The crowd around the table thinned out—first Dani and Gen disappeared, then Misha hooted at Osric and Osric looked at him excitedly. “Really?”

Misha trilled in affirmation.

“Empire era microchip collection, my ass,” Felicia said.

“Leave ‘em be,” Chris ordered. “They’re in love!”

“In love?” Aldis asked faintly. “Osric and the blue furball?”

“Hey, don’t be speciesist,” Chris said. “Love knows no bounds.”

“You don’t know Osric,” Aldis said darkly. “He might actually think Misha is showing him his Empire era microchip collection.”

“Which exists,” Jensen said with a heaviness in his words, raising his glass and pointing it at Chris. “Not everything is about love.”

Chris gave him a long look, then looked at Jared, then back at Jensen. “Isn’t it?”

“Fuck you.” Jensen slammed his glass on the table, then he stood and left the mess.

Great. Jared had a feeling the thinking wasn’t going well. He reached for his glass but to his dismay he found it empty. And when had that happened?

In the awkward silence around the table, Chris leaned forward and fixed his startlingly blue eyes on Jared. “Aren’t you gonna to go after him?”

"He looks like he wants to be alone.”

Chris snorted. “Bullshit. I’ve tried to get Jensen to see love the entire time I’ve been with him but I couldn't. And it all makes sense now. He had to wait for you.”

“O-kay,” Jared said slowly.

Chad leaned into him. “You know, I’m not one for the lovey dovey shit, but even I can see Jensen wants to bang you but is having some hang-up from his terrible past or some shit.”

Chris nodded sagely. “Very terrible past.”

Jared leaned forward curiously. “What happened?” If Jensen wouldn’t tell him, maybe his crew would.

Chris emptied his glass. “I don’t know. He never talks about it.”

“Never,” Felicia chimed in. “We don’t even know where he’s from.”

Chris nodded. “All we know is that Jensen can’t go home.”

“Once, he said he’s a dead man,” Jared said, remembering the cryptic remark on Rallah’s planet.

Felicia and Chris exchanged heavy glances. “Then you know more than we do,” Chris said. “And if that ain’t a reason for you to go after him then I don’t know what is.”

And, well. Chris had point. And Jared wasn’t ready to give up yet.

_Perseverance. Stubbornness._

Jared stood. Chad clapped him on the shoulder. “Go get your man.”

Chris raised his glass again. “To true love!”

“I’m gonna puke,” Felicia said faintly.

 

Jared found Jensen in the upper gangway, sitting in front of one of the long windows, looking out into the vastness of space. Jared held out the bottle of shine he’d brought along as a peace offering.

Jensen looked up at him warily but took the bottle and drank. Slowly, Jared sat down next to him. It was harder than he’d thought. Huh. They'd really had a lot to drink tonight.

“You wanna talk?”

“No.”

Jared rolled his eyes. “Stars, you are such a grumpy old bastard.”

Jensen’s head whipped around to stare incredulously at him. “Excuse me?”

Jared took a swig from the bottle but it did nothing to moderate his anger. “Well, look at you!” Jared waved agitatedly at him. “We spend the night together, after turns of foreplay, basically, and because of something oh-so-terrible that happened to you probably eons ago, you're sulking and avoiding me.”

Jensen opened his mouth angrily but Jared violently pointed the bottle at him. “No. Just no. Everyone has crap in their past. I watched my parents get fucking murdered, in case you forgot.”

“I haven’t,” Jensen said quietly, “but—”

“No buts. I don’t even care if you don’t want to tell me.” Jared took another swig from the bottle and reconsidered. “Okay, maybe I do care a little but it’s not—I don’t—” He waved the bottle again to make his point.

Jensen’s eyebrows sharply rose but Jared saw the reluctant smile tugging on his lips. Lips Jared should really kiss.

“What I mean is,” he said, with more decorum, “that I’m gonna let you have your secrets. So whatever is eating you up inside, whatever makes you think that this isn’t going to work, I’m giving you a pass on it. Whatever it is, it’s not an issue. And if it ever comes up, we’ll deal with it then.”

“It’s not that easy,” Jensen said.

“Yes. Yes, it is. We can make it easy.” Jared leaned forward, willing Jensen to understand. “We decide how it goes, no one else. And if we decide that it’s easy, then it is.”

Jensen shook his head, eyes wide and fixed on Jared’s face. “It doesn’t—I can’t do that.” 

“Can’t or don’t want to?”

Jensen huffed. “Stars, you’re such an annoying little shit.”

Jared grinned. “The only important thing is whether or not you want to go to bed with me again.”

Jensen gave him a look that clearly said he thought Jared was crazy. “That’s a given. But you want more.”

“And you don’t?” It was a challenge, not a question. With all the angsting in spaceship gangways, Jared was pretty sure Jensen wanted that too.

“I don’t know if I can,” Jensen said but he didn’t look away.

Jared wanted to crow in victory but Jensen needed a gentler hand now. He reached out and cupped Jensen’s jaw. “How about we find out?” And then he leaned in and kissed Jensen, soft but lingering. When he finally pulled back, Jensen was staring at him dazedly.

Jared leaned in for another kiss and then another. He crawled into Jensen’s lap, kissed the tip of his nose and then pressed their foreheads together.

“Come on, Jensen. Let’s just see how it goes.”

Gently, he sought out Jensen’s mouth for another kiss and he could feel the exact moment Jensen got on board. His hands tightened on Jared’s hips and he surged upwards, his whole body tensing like a taut wire when he pulled Jared in closer. Heady with his success, Jared let himself sink into Jensen.

They didn’t even make it back to bed. Jensen took him right there, in the gangway where anyone could walk past at any moment. They didn’t undress, Jensen just pushed down their pants and then he pressed Jared against the cool glass and fucked him while Jared stared out at the stars, his breath fogging up the window.

Jensen had one hand on his hip and the other covered Jared’s right hand, pressing it against the glass, and his mouth traced the invisible line of hickeys he’d given Jared on Rallah’s planet. Jared reached back to bury a hand in the short but soft hairs at the back of Jensen's head and pulled him in closer.

The noise Jensen made was half groan, half sob and he gripped Jared so tight it hurt but Jared didn’t mind. It felt like victory.

Jensen came first, shaking all over and muttering intelligible nonsense into Jared’s ear while Jared finished, Jensen’s voice music in his ears.

They stumbled back to bed in contented silence and fell asleep with no space between their bodies.

 

Morning found Jared alone in bed again. He listened carefully but no sound came from his bathroom. Damn. He’d need to have a serious conversation with Jensen about the joys of morning sex.

He sat up to go find him but stopped immediately because his head started throbbing like a Grizorian slug bite. Fuck. They really got drunk last night.

More carefully, he made his way to his bathroom. The shower helped some and then he went looking for Jensen.

He found everyone in the mess. Everyone except Jensen.

“You look… not well rested,” Gen said with a smirk.

Jared gave her a onceover, noticed her dishevelled hair and a red spot peeking out under the collar of her henley. “Takes one to know one.”

She grinned and looked over to Dani who was standing in front of the stove, waiting for her coffee to finish and barely suppressing a yawn. “Just took a page out of your book.”

“Speaking of…” Jared said and jerked his head into Osric’s and Misha’s direction.

Gen shrugged. “Misha made some trilling noises before but the others refused to translate. Though they did laugh. Spoilsports.”

That was when Jensen showed up. He stepped into the mess and paused, eyes fixed on Jared. He hesitated, then slowly approached the table, taking a seat at the other end, opposing Jared's chair.

“Please,” Chad said grandly and waved his hand, "we're all adults, you can sit next to each other and feed each other food and play footsie under the table.”

“Speak for yourself; I don't want to see that shit,” Aldis said.

“You're all just grumpy because you're jealous.” Chris went around the table with a big pot of fruit mush and distributed it on everyone's plate. “Love is a beautiful thing; revel in it.”

Jensen flinched almost imperceptibly at Chris’ words and Jared wanted to bang his head on the table in frustration. He got up and under the whistles of Dani and Gen sat down next to Jensen.

“I thought we made progress last night,” he grumbled quietly.

“We got drunk last night,” Jensen corrected him with emphasis.

“Drunkenness frees you to be truthful,” Jared quoted Kric Eripke.

“And makes you most prone to disaster,” Jensen continued the quote.

Jared gave him a challenging look and finished it. “For truth brings either freedom or disaster.”

Jensen let out a rough laugh. “That it does.”

“Aww, now they’re quoting poetry!” Chad exclaimed, overly cheerful.

“Now, I’m really gonna puke,” Felicia said dryly.

Before Jared could tell them off, the Imp's warning lights started flashing purple.

“Ah, we’re getting close,” Chad said and stood. “Autopilot’s about done. I’m gonna go see where to put us down on the moon.”

“You make it sound like it’s hard,” Dani said and dismissively tossed her long hair over her shoulder.

Chad rolled his eyes and grumbled something about know-it-all redheads.

Gen leaned into Jared. “I never really wanted to hook up with Chad, but a threesome with him and Dani…”

Jared laughed, despite the ball of anxiety lodged deep in his stomach. They were nearing the point of separation and he still wasn’t sure he’d see Jensen again.

“Jensen—” he started.

“I’m gonna go, oversee packing,” Jensen said and abruptly stood.

“Bastard,” Jared muttered but he didn’t know if Jensen heard.

 

Chad landed the Imp, under Dani’s constant stream of criticism, close to the 8-15. Jensen’s crew said goodbye with handshakes and hugs. Dani and Gen kissed and Misha pulled Osric tight against his body and used his ears to stroke Osric’s head.

Jensen stood next to Jared with a closed-off expression. “I’ll see you around.”

It was just fucking unfair. For the first time since Jared had dragged Jensen out of the hole in the Nivonir desert, Jensen was showered and decked out in full travel gear. His boots were laced up all the way, accentuating his bow legs and he had on his fucking thigh holster again which had given Jared wet dreams for days after they’d met for the first time.

He was wearing a faded green henley that did unforgivable things to his eyes and the dusting of freckles covering the bridge of his nose. And it was tight enough to emphasize his strong shoulders and thick arms which wielded weapons so competently and were covered in scars Jared had yet to trace. And Jared had _had_ that, and now he couldn’t anymore. Because Jensen had fucking ‘issues’.

Jared huffed. “Yeah, maybe. Look, Jensen, I don’t know what your deal is but we don’t have to blow this out of proportion. I’m a big boy and if all you want is to fuck, then that’s fine.”

Jensen let out a harsh laugh. He stared at Jared, disbelief and something else, something dark Jared couldn’t quite identify in his eyes. Then he stepped into Jared’s space and pulled him down into a quick, rough kiss.

“I’ll see you around,” he said, more determined this time.

“Okay,” Jared said and he had no idea what it meant.

 

 

**Jared NOW**

 

But Jared didn’t have any time to dwell on Jensen; he was too busy listening as the Blue warriors debated what to do with him.

“I bet his uncle will pay to have his nephew back,” Beady-eyes said. He sounded very proud of his assessment.

“And give up his throne?” Stern-face asked through his bloody nose.

Jared agreed with Stern-face. His uncle would never give up his throne. After all, he’d killed Jared’s parents to get it.

“Well, maybe he’ll kill him,” the commander said thoughtfully. “But either way, he won’t want us having the lost Red Prince.”

“Look,” Jared said and forced himself up into a sitting position. If they brought him to his uncle, Jared was dead. “My uncle is an asshole. He’ll never give you a good deal. He’ll probably offer you something flashy, like my great-grandmother’s crown or the sacred spear, but they’re really just trinkets.” Jared leaned forward. “But I know where the good stuff is. I can lead you to the vault directly.”

The commander looked at him in disgust. “You’re right: nothing more than a dishonorable thief. I don’t want riches, Prince. I want to win this war.” He balled his hands into fists. “Ackles might have taken our greatest warriors but the Blue faction will rule these lands again.”

Great. He was dealing with fanatics.

“So, no riches for you,” Jared said slowly, like he had to think about it. “But what if these riches aren’t made of gold or jewels?”

The commander gave him a scornful look. “I told you, I don’t want any treasure.”

“No, you want to win this war,” Jared said, with conviction in his voice.

“That’s right.”

“But you can’t,” Jared said and started pacing up and down his small cell. “Ten years ago, when you were so close to victory, the Green faction robbed you of most of your weapons.”

The commander was watching him avidly, his lips curled in disgust.

“And a single man took your greatest prize,” Jared continued slowly. “The elite of your warriors, wiped out like they were nothing.” He snapped his fingers. “And with your weapons and your warriors gone you lost any progress you had made. The Green faction reclaimed their territory and rebuilt their city and the Red faction wiped out half your army.”

“Silence!” the commander roared. “Do not insult me, thief. You know nothing!”

“Really?” Jared asked with an amused smile. The commander’s chest was heaving and his eyes were promising pain and torture.

“I actually know a lot. For example, I know that when the Green faction stole your weapons, they gave half of them to my uncle. And I can tell you how to get them back.” Jared gripped the bars of his cell. “ _That’s_ the treasure.”

He could see the commander warring within, could see him thinking about it. But his face filled with hatred once more.

He stepped up to the bars and everything in Jared screamed at him to step back but he held his ground.

The commander pulled his left sleeve up and revealed a deep jagged scar on his arm. “I almost lost my arm when our warrior elite was destroyed by that Green ghost. He was already cast out by his own family for the shame he brought upon them; do you really think I’ll stoop to his level? I will win this war with honor and dignity and once I’ve wiped out the Green faction, I will dig up Ackles’ grave and hang his bracelets on my trophy wall!”

The commander was panting harshly, then he drew back. “There’s no deal, thief.”

Jared let out a low whistle. “Wow. Ackles really did a number on you, huh?”

The commander glared. “Be glad he’s no longer with us. After what he did to your uncle, he would have torn the Red faction apart too, if his mother hadn’t banished him. Then again, you’re a thief and a smuggler. What do you know about caring?”

Violently, Jared gripped the bars. "Fuck you, I care. Just because I don’t care about your stupid war that does nothing but tear this planet apart for no reason doesn’t mean I can’t care about my people.”

The commander just shook his head. “If you cared, if you had any honor, you would have returned a long time ago.”

“For my uncle to murder me?”

“Then you die fighting!” the commander roared.

Jared shook his head. “That’s just stupid. That’s not how you survive.”

The commander scoffed. “You disgust me.”

Then he turned away and waved at the other warrior to follow him.

“Send a messenger to the Red King. We will extend the truce so we can finally wipe out the Green faction,” the commander said, and then they were out of earshot.

Jared let himself fall back onto the wooden planks. He needed a new plan.

Of course, as he thought about all the impossible ways in which he could escape, he couldn’t help but wonder how it would go if Jensen were to show up here. He’d chew him out for his stupidity, no doubt, but he would save him. His honor alone would demand it. Everything else… Jared still had no idea where they stood.

Jared had to scoff at himself. He needed to stop obsessing about Jensen. That was exactly what had landed him here in the first place.

 

  


**Jared THEN**

 

Jared did not see Jensen around. But that was okay because he was busier than ever. When they first started out, jobs had been slow, but after six years in the business, their reputation had spread. Which was why Ru’Con had summoned him for a job.

She was sitting enthroned on a big, dark red leaf growing out of the giant, creeping vine behind her. It offset her pale skin and fire-red hair.

“Jared Padalecki,” she said slowly. “Welcome.”

Then the doors shut behind him, leaving his crew outside. For a moment Jared was reminded of Rallah, who did business exactly like that, but the two… entities couldn't be more different. Ru’Con lived on a jungle-like planet, her mansion grown out of plants. It was always hot and humid and if she didn’t look perfectly pale and cool all the time with eyes glowing a deep purple Jared would think she was human.

Jared bowed deeply. He’d like to think he’d learned his lesson in dealing with powerful entities.

“I am in need of someone of your reputation,” Ru’Con said, her voice wrapping around Jared like sharp velvet. “I need someone who is skilled, fearless, fast, and ruthless.”

“I am all those things, when required,” Jared said with another small bow.

Ru’Con inclined her head. “So I have heard. I was very impressed, especially when I heard that you went head to head with Jensen Ironheart and even won, occasionally.”

Jared stiffened but kept his smile in place. “He is a worthy opponent.”

“I’m sure he is,” Ru’Con said and leaned forward. “But I want you for this job. And I will pay you well.”

“And what is this job you want me to do?”

Ru’Con smiled. “It’s a pair of ancient, blessed blades. They belong to a faction of warriors of Aventine.”

“Aventine?” Jared repeated hoarsely.

Ru’Con raised her eyebrows. “I know the planet has been a war zone for decades but I didn’t think it would be a problem for you. It was my understanding that you stole from the Nivonir. From the Gulla. The Rhashku. You stole from Ironheart himself. Surely, a little ancient feud on Aventine won’t be a problem.”

Jared ignored the giant pit growing in his stomach. “It’s not a problem.”

She cocked her head. “Good. Several people turned me down, you know.”

Jared grinned. “Because they can’t handle it. I can.”

She smiled and held out her hand. One of the vines grew out of the wall behind her, handing her a small electronic map.

“Everything you need to know is on here. I expect the delivery in a turn.”

“Of course.”

She smiled sugar sweet. “Of course, indeed. I don’t take kindly at having to wait.”

From the side of her throne, a blossom turned to Jared and opened, exposing razor sharp teeth.

Jared bowed deeply.

 

Jared really should have seen this coming. Gen was sitting in front of him, arms crossed in front of her chest.

“Are you sure about this?” she asked.

“Hey, we’ve done crazier shit.” Jared tried for a winning smile.

“But Jared, this is Aventine.”

Jared leaned back. “So?”

“So?” Gen sputtered. “What if someone recognizes you? You’d walk right into your own grave!”

“I’m like triple in height than I was then.” Jared gestured at his chest to make his point. "No one will recognize me, relax. Besides, we don’t even have to go into Red territory.”

“Jared, it’s stupid.” Gen put her hands on the table and looked at him imploringly. “Look, I know that Jensen—”

“Has nothing to do with this,” Jared cut her off. “I mean yes, I’m kind of bummed 'cause the sex was awesome and probably would only have gotten better, but in the end, he’s a crotchety old bastard, so, you know.”

Gen’s facial expression said that she didn’t believe a single word. So Jared just clapped a hand on her shoulder. “Relax, okay? This is going to be the greatest score we’ve ever pulled.”

She shook her head.

“You’re not gonna leave me alone on this one, are you?”

“Of course not!” Gen viciously poked a finger at his chest. “But I want it on record that this is a terrible idea!”

“What’s a terrible idea?” Chad poked his head in.

Gen sighed. “This new heist Jared has cooked up.”

“Oh, need to prove something to Jensen?” Aldis asked, following Chad on his heels.

“Shut up,” Jared grumbled. “His dick wasn’t that great.”

“Just like he’s not that handsome?” Chad asked with a grin.

“You’re all terrible friends.”

His crew laughed heartlessly, but Chad clapped him on the shoulder when he sat down and Aldis pushed a little bag of sweet nuts over to him. His crew wasn’t the kind to offer a shoulder to cry on but they still cared. Jared reached for the nuts and leaned slightly into Chad while Gen outlined the plan. It didn’t stop the hurt in his chest but it made him feel better nonetheless.

 

Later, on their way to Aventine, Gen came to his cabin after everyone else had turned in for the night.

“We should tell the others.”

Surprised, Jared looked at her. “What? Why?”

Her lips pressed into a thin line. “It could get dangerous. And if they know, they can better protect you.”

“Protect me?” Jared repeated incredulously.

Gen held up her hand. “I’m not questioning your abilities here. But I really think that going back is tempting fate, growth spurt or not. And I would feel better if they knew.”

“You were always the one insisting on keeping it a secret.”

“Well, now I’m not anymore.”

“I really don’t think it’s necessary.”

“Well, it’s my price," Gen said. “I will do your insane plan with you—if the others can watch your back too.”

Jared glared.

“You wanted to tell them anyway. The only reason you didn’t was because I asked you not to. This should make you happy.”

"You want to tell them for the wrong reasons.”

“Jared, I'm gonna say this once. This is crazy, even for you. And we both know why you’re doing this. And if this is how you cope, if this is what you need, then I’m with you. But we need to be as safe as possible.”

She glared at him and Jared held her gaze.

Gen’s expression softened. “Look, I’m really sorry about Jensen. And maybe one day he’ll come around. I mean, you do have a habit of bumping into each other. “

Jared let out a derisive laugh. “Don’t feed me the fairytale line. We both know that happy endings don’t work like that. There’s no grand 'I love you, I love you too' at the end.”

“Maybe not,” Gen said softly. “But that’s no reason to go on a suicide mission.”

“Oh stars, this is not a suicide mission!”

“Indulge me anyway?” she said seriously.

And Jared could never deny her when she asked like this.

“Fine.”

 

Aldis stared with his mouth open, Chad kept blinking like a Grizorian night owl and Osric cocked his head.

“Royalty?” he asked. “You? I mean no offense, but…”

“Not exactly royal decorum,” Aldis finished for him.

Jared shrugged. “I never had to learn any stuffy customs. And it’s better for staying incognito anyway.”

“But dude!” Chad’s eyes were so wide, Jared thought they were going to bug out of his head. “It’s the perfect pick-up line!” He batted his eyelashes. “Save me, I'm a lost prince!”

“What part of 'he would probably be murdered' did you not hear?” Gen asked, exasperated.

“Yeah, that would suck,” Chad admitted. “But still, man, what a wasted opportunity.”

Jared just clapped Chad on the back. He knew he meant well. Then again… “When did I  ever have trouble getting laid?” Jared asked indignantly.

“There’s always room for more,” Chad declared airily. And after a beat, he smiled smugly. “Pun intended.”

Everyone groaned.

“Let’s just prep,” Jared said. “Aldis, Gen, weapons check, Osric, you work on the map, Chad you get us five different escape routes.”

The task was tricky; it would need their full concentration to get in, steal the blades, and get out again. Exactly what Jared needed right now.

 

They landed in the fog covered mountains at the edge of the Blue faction’s territory once night had fallen. Osric put the Imp in stealth-mode, the outside panels reflecting the gray fog and the dark rocks. To be safe, they gathered some of the broad-needled tree branches growing in the mountains and hid the ship as well as they could.

Afterwards, Jared needed a moment. He’d tried not to think about it, how it would feel to be home. But there was no recognition, no earth shattering emotion. There was a scent in the air, the faint, aromatic smell that was also part of the shampoo he always used, from the large reecer trees that grew on several planets in the galaxy. But the scent was mundane enough not to make him nostalgic.

‘You okay?” Gen asked and carefully took his hand.

“Surprisingly, yeah,” Jared said. “But I told you, it’s not a big deal.”

She rolled her eyes but let it go.

“The palace is that way,” Osric said and pointed straight down the hill.

“That’s gonna take us through too much open terrain,” Jared said. Carefully, he surveyed the area. “Let’s walk along the river. There are always bushes growing on the shore and for the last stretch, we can take the inflatable float. Chad, you stay with the Imp.”

Gen shot him a sharp look. “But be ready, you might need to come save us.”

“You are such a worrywart.” Jared’s heart was beating fast with the rush of a heist. He couldn’t wait to get down there and get his hands on the blades.

They gathered their bags and Jared shouldered the package with the float. Then they made their way down the mountain, cutting across the hillside until they reached the gurgling river. It was wild up there but it would flatten out and calm down once it flowed into the valley.

As soon as they reached the bottom of the hill, they unfolded the float and inflated it. They had stopped talking, only communicating with hand signs because they weren’t taking any risks. If they failed, the Blue faction would kill them.

In the cover of the river’s vegetation, they reached the old Queen’s hall. Generations ago, she had led the Blue faction to their first victory and she was buried with her blade, said to be blessed with old magic that vanquished every foe. Jared personally thought it was a load of bullshit —she probably had just kicked some serious ass —but he knew that people paid a lot of shims for those relics.

They snuck up to the back of the hall and waited for the guards to pass them on their nightly rounds. With a well-placed shot, Gen’s tiny grappling hook snagged between the wooden beams, securing the rope, and Jared and Gen climbed up to the small window.

The hall below them was empty except for two warriors guarding the shrine with the blades. Jared motioned to the one on the left for himself and the one on the right for Gen. They both raised their weapons and when Jared nodded, they shot.

The two guards fell to the ground simultaneously, the long, slim cylinders that had pumped a tranquilizer into their bodies protruding from their necks.

Jared grinned at Gen, then they took the rope and threw it down into the room. Quickly, they rappelled down the wall and then they went to get the blades.

The statue of the queen was larger than life, and her dark eyes stared down at them unforgivingly.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” Gen said.

Behind them, there was a sound. Jared turned and for a moment he thought he’d see Jensen there, cocky grin in place but it was one of the guards who was getting to his feet.

“And now you jinxed it,” Jared said and reached for his gun again.

“How is this my fault?” Gen hissed.

Jared shot the guard again and Gen put a tranq in the guard that was still down. “Just to be safe,” she said. “Now let’s hurry.”

Jared climbed the pedestal of the statue and pulled the blades out of the queen’s hands. “Apologies, m’lady,” he muttered.

The blades were heavier than he’d expected, crafted from a matte-black stone. But when he touched the end, they still drew blood.

“Fuck.” Carefully, he wrapped them into a leather satchel and then stowed them away in his backpack.

Jared’s comm piece crackled.

“Abort!” Aldis yelled. “Get out, now! Chad, come get us!”

Jared and Gen exchanged a panicked look, then they sprinted towards the wall under the window.

The rope was lying at their feet in a pile on the floor.

“Fuck,” Gen said with feeling.

Behind them, the door banged open.

“Get them!” a harsh voice shouted and when Jared turned he saw a group of soldiers charging at them.

Fuck.

 

Shoving and pushing, the soldiers herded them into a big hall. Osric and Aldis were already there, surrounded by a group of warriors.

“Somebody get the commander!” one of the soldiers shouted.

“What did you do with the blades?” another warrior addressed Jared. “Tell me or your friends die!”

Another soldier pressed his long sword against Osric’s neck.

Jared raised his hands over his head. “Whoa. Everybody stay calm. No one needs to get hurt. I’ll give you the blades, just don’t hurt my friend.”

The warrior pushed the blade deeper into Osric’s skin. “Now!”

“Alright,” Jared shouted.

He pulled off his backpack and carefully reached inside. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw someone dart between the wagons and old spacecrafts. The people of Aventine didn’t believe in technology, but the army hoarded some vessels for emergencies. Jared suppressed his smile. This was definitely an emergency.

He made a big show of pulling the satchel out of his bag and unwrapping the blades.

When one of the warriors reached out, Jared held both blades over his head.

“Ah-ah-aha. You come any closer and I smash them together.”

The warriors froze.

“You wouldn’t dare,” one of them breathed out.

“Oh, but I would. Now let my friends go.”

Reluctantly, the warriors stepped back.

Jared smiled. “Excellent.”

In the back of the hall, an engine sputtered, then started.

Outraged, the warriors turned towards the noise.

“That’s our ride. If you’ll excuse us.” And with that, Jared threw the blades in the air in opposing directions. “Run!” he yelled at his crew.

But they didn’t need the encouragement. As soon as the Blue warriors dove after the blades, Jared’s people started sprinting towards the big gate at the end of the hall that was standing wide open. Behind them the engine whirred and the little shuttle Chad had commandeered was closing in. The hatch was open and one after another Jared’s crew jumped inside. First Osric, then Aldis and Gen.

Behind them the Blue warriors were shouting and throwing spears. Jared ran after the shuttle and jumped, just managing to grip the open hatch.

“Go, go go!”

Chad accelerated the shuttle. But the gate was starting to close, faster than they'd be able to make it through.

Fuck.

 

 

**Jared NOW**

 

Jared couldn’t find a way out. There was no new plan he could concoct. Not a feasible one at least. Jared had wracked his brain but he couldn’t come up with any other way to convince the commander to work with him. The only thing he wanted was Ackles and Jared couldn’t send his crew ghost hunting across the galaxy for one of the most dangerous men Aventine had ever produced. Jared’s only chance was to make a break for it on the way to the Red Castle. His home. The one place he’d never wanted to go back to.

They made him wait for two days. The food was crap and he didn’t get to shower. He stank worse than Jensen when he’d dragged him out of that hole in the desert, and he couldn’t shave. He hated stubble. It looked amazing on Jensen but Jared didn’t want it on his face.

When the door to the dungeon banged open on the second day, Jared had a wild thought that it would be Jensen. Because whenever something had seriously gone wrong, Jensen had been there. When Rallah had taken Jared and his crew, Jensen had saved them. When they’d been tied up as a sacrifice on Hratull, Jensen had killed the beast. Jared had done his fair share of saving too, but whenever things had seemed impossible for him, Jensen had shown up. Things just went that way for Jared.

But the men who came down the stairs were the commander, Beady-eyes and two men in red and black uniforms.

They walked over to Jared’s cell. They bowed deeply—too deeply. With mocking grins, they looked at him.

“Your Highness,” one of them said, “your uncle is waiting for you.”

Fuck.

 

They put him in cuffs and unceremoniously dragged him to a rocca-drawn wagon outside. Roccas were small, but fast and sturdy. Their choppy, six-legged gait made them unsuitable to ride, but with the right suspension system, they could pull wagons.

The ride was long and bumpy. The food continued to be bad and not nearly enough, but on the second day they dragged Jared outside, made him strip and then dunked him into a river. The water was freezing and Jared desperately wished he had soap but it was better than nothing. They gave him new clothes—“so the King doesn’t have to smell your filth, smuggler"—and Jared took the opportunity to clock the closest guard in the face and run for the woods.

It was a long shot, and they did catch up with him, but it was worth a try, even with the beating they dealt him after.

The wagon didn’t have a window, but on the morning of the third day, the sounds and movements of the wagon changed. They had reached a cobbled road. Then they ascended a steep hill and Jared knew it was the way up to the castle.

He took a deep breath. It still wasn’t over.

From the wagon, they dragged him directly to a back entrance. From there, they went through winding corridors and down a narrow flight of stairs. Another dungeon then. Great.

They locked him into another cell and left his hands tied. He was in the palace, in his home, and he was wearing shackles.

When the door finally opened, his mind was flooded with memories of the day his parents were murdered. The man looked so much like his mother: the same wavy brown hair and the hazel eyes Jared had inherited from her. Only one eye was visible, the other hidden behind a golden, gem-studded eyepatch. Where Jared was broad and muscled, the man was slim, with a gaunt face and thin lips.

Jared knew immediately who he was even though he had no memories of him.

“Nephew,” his uncle said. “How wonderful to see you again.”

Jared swallowed the bile rising in his throat and smiled. “Really? I think we both could’ve gone without ever meeting again.”

His uncle spread his arms. “Well you’re the one who came back.”

“Not here,” Jared said with emphasis. “I don’t know if you noticed, but I stayed far away from you. I wanted nothing to do with you.”

“I always wondered, you know,” his uncle said conversationally, as if they were discussing the weather. “If you’d ever come back. Claim the throne, I mean.”

“Avenge my parents death, you mean,” Jared bit out.

“Ah. I wondered if you knew.”

“Oh, I do.”

His uncle raised his eyebrows. “And still no revenge plots?”

“Perseverance,” Jared said tersely. “Survival.”

His uncle nodded. “Then you’ll understand why I have to do what I’m about to do.”

“I don't know,” Jared said with a pointed look at his uncle’s eyepatch. “Seems like you had at least one close call in the past.”

His uncle flinched. “And I persevered. You won’t be so lucky.”

Jared leaned back. “What exactly is the plan here?”

“I will kill you,” his uncle said calmly. “I really apologize, Jared; it’s not personal. Now your parents, oh, that was personal. But you, you weren’t even supposed to exist. You know, I was the heir to the throne. And then, when everyone thought your mother was a barren hag, she got pregnant.”

White-hot rage shot through Jared. “Don’t talk about her like that!”

His uncle shot him an annoyed look. “So emotional. I assume it comes with the lifestyle.”

“Lifestyle?” Jared bit out.

“Yes, your smuggling. That’s what you are, isn’t it? A smuggler and a thief. Honestly, you’re a disgrace to the Red faction.”

“Says the guy who killed his own sister,” Jared shot back.

Jared’s uncle grinned. “What can I say? Ruling is a cutthroat business.”

Jared wanted to rip him apart. With his bare hands, if he had to.

“So, are you brave enough to kill me yourself or are you gonna send some henchmen again?” If he could just get close enough…

“Oh no,” Jared's uncle shook his head with a slimey laugh. “I will execute you. For treason.”

Jared gaped at him. “You? Execute _me_ for treason?”

“Of course.” His uncle airily waved his hand, then he started ticking points off on his index finger. “Even though you knew you were the heir to the throne, you did not return to Aventine after the men responsible for killing your parents were executed. You circumvented your responsibilities, you disgraced our entire family by becoming a thief and a smuggler and now you have returned to Aventine to steal from our allies, the Blue faction.” His uncle grinned. “Tell me, nephew, where is the lie?”

“If I had come back before, you would have killed me,” Jared bit out. “Like you killed my parents!”

“Wrong. The Amber faction killed your parents. Conveniently, it gave me the opportunity to finally wipe those worms off the face of this planet and take their ore mines, but that’s what you get when you plan ahead.”

Incredulously, Jared shook his head. “The people will never believe that.”

His uncle smiled darkly. “Oh, but they will. You’ll see.” With that, he turned to leave the dungeon.

“You will never get away with that, you fucking piece of shit!”

His uncle didn't even turn around, he just raised a hand and waved.

Jared slammed his fist against the bars, making them rattle loudly in the small room. He couldn’t let his uncle get away with this. He just couldn’t.

 

When they came to take him the next morning, Jared fought tooth and nail. He knew his chances of getting away were next to nothing but he had to try. But in the end, they shackled his his hands behind his back, and then they ripped off his shirt and held his chin to shave him.

“So that there’s no question of your identity, traitor,” one of the guards said and spit on the floor in front of Jared.

“You do know that my uncle killed my parents, right?” Jared said. “I mean, there’s really no other option.”

“Like we'd believe a thief,” another guard scoffed.

Great. Jared really hadn’t thought that his profession would be such a problem. Then again, honor was the only thing that mattered on Aventine.

“The only reason I didn’t come back and became a smuggler instead is because I knew he’d kill me. I mean, I saw my parents get murdered, right before my eyes!”

Something in the guard's demeanor actually softened for a moment, but then his expression hardened again. “What happened to your parents was terrible. But your uncle avenged the dishonor. As you should have.”

More fanatics. Awesome.

They dragged him along the corridors and when they crossed the first great hall, Jared stumbled. There, on the wall, hung a giant map of Aventine, the borders of the Red territory drawn in the blood of their enemies. And Jared recognized that map.

 

  
  


**Jared THEN**

 

“Will we ever go home, Julian?”

Julian looked up from the map. He’d been drawing lines in different colors to signify the shifting territory boundaries on Aventine. The factions had been at war for centuries and every victory changed the planet.

Julian carefully fixed his brown eyes on Jared, then he slowly shook his head. “No. There is a price on my head for taking the Prince away and you know that your uncle will kill you as soon as he sees you.”

Julian had never lied to Jared. He’d always told Jared that when he was old enough, he’d tell him how his parents had died and on Jared’s tenth birthday, he’d told him the truth about his uncle. That had been a turn ago.

Ever since then, Jared hated this uncle that he couldn’t even remember. He’d killed his parents. Jared wanted nothing more than to kill him. He didn't care that his uncle wanted to kill him; Jared would become a great warrior and slay him.

“You want to go back, don’t you?” Julian asked. “Kill your uncle?”

"He deserves to die!” Jared yelled. “He killed my parents!”

“Do you know why I’m teaching you all of this?” Julian asked. “If we’re never going home?”

Jared shook his head.

"So that you understand what revenge does to a people. What upholding honor does.” Julian sighed. “Our planet is constantly at war. It tears us apart. Keeps us living with the bare minimum. No riches, no innovation. There’s so much out there in this great galaxy, but we shun it because only our honor matters to us. We only see our customs, our way of life, our honor. But there’s so much more out there.”

Julian stood and walked past the pictures Jared had drawn for art lessons. All the landscapes and lifeforms of the different planets, star constellations and spaceships.

“The wonders of the universe are always within our reach—if we can only see past our own world,” Julian said with emphasis. “You know who said that?”

Jared shook his head again. He was feeling very confused and very stupid and he hated that feeling.

“Kric Eripke,” Julian said. “One of the greatest philosophers of the galaxy.”

“Isn’t he the one who wrote the _Epic Tale of Two Brothers_?” Jared asked, glad to know something.

Julian nodded. “That’s right. We read parts of it. It’s much longer and tedious in its entirety with lots of obscure passages no one today understands anymore, but it’s a classic love story so of course people still read it. But he also wrote the _Contemplations on Life_. We’ll read more of them when you get older.” Julian went over to the whiteboard. “But this, this is the most important thing Eripke ever said.”

_The wonders of the universe are always within our reach—if we can only see past our own world._

“Don’t let your past blind you to what’s out there, Jared,” Julian said quietly. “You can see everything, do everything. But you cannot do any of it if you lie dead in a ditch because you went back to Aventine.” Julian leaned forward. “That’s what your family’s credo really means. _Perseverance_.”

Jared looked at the maps, the numbers of dead warriors, and then he looked at his drawings of the world out there.

“It means survival, doesn’t it?” he asked and Julian gave him one of his rare smiles.

 

That night, Jared snuck out and instead of going down to the living quarters to play with his toys, he went to their compound’s fence.

_The wonders of the universe are always within our reach—if we can only see past our own world._

The compound had been his world and whenever they left, they only walked to the sprawling valley and the lake in front of them. They’d never gone through the forest down to the village. It was too dangerous, Julian said.

But if Jared wanted to see the wonders of the universe, then he needed to go out into the world.

So Jared climbed the fence and stole into the forest. It was night but the stars were bright and numerous as always and they lit his way through the dense vegetation. Jared marveled at the old and broad trees, at the soft moss covering the ground and the hooting calls of the birds.

When he reached the edge of the forest he saw something glint. He walked closer to find a girl crouching on the floor, sparks flying from the ground before her. When she heard him, she whirled around, pointing a stick at him.

“One step closer and I take your head off!”

She was about as tall as Jared, with long brown hair that hung in a tangled mess past her shoulders. Her clothes were torn and dirty. She must be poor, but she wasn’t afraid.

And at her feet lay a crude blade made from a dark green stone. Next to it lay a jet-black tinder stone.

“Are you making a knife?” Jared asked in astonishment.

She jutted her chin out. “What if I am?”

“That is so cool! Can you teach me how to do that?” Jared asked eagerly. Julian would never teach him that.

The girl blushed but then she collected herself again. “Of course. Sit.” Down on the ground, she reached out her hand. “My name is Gen,” she said, “but you can’t tell anyone that I snuck out.”

“My name is Jared,” Jared said, “and you can’t tell anyone that I snuck out either.”

In the brightness of the night, they grinned at each other.

 

  


**Jared NOW**

 

The soldiers roughly dragged him along and Jared fought to pull himself together. He did not spend his entire life looking out into the galaxy only to die on Aventine, trapped in his terrible past.

When they walked past an arrangement of statues, Jared pretended to stumble again and crashed right into the statue of a warrior. He twisted himself around, knocked his elbows painfully into the hard metal but managed to reach out and break off one of the little spikes on the statue's wristbands.

It was time to remember all the other things Gen had taught him.

The guards pushed open a giant double door and dragged Jared through. A murmuring rose in the room and to his horror Jared saw that he was being brought into the grand court chamber. At the end of the room he saw the bench where all five high judges sat with, of course, his uncle.

The rows of benches to the side were filled with people—warriors and aristocrats but also regular people from the street judging by their clothes. And they were all staring at him.

Jared held his head high and stared at his uncle. Behind his back, he set his fingers to work. He didn’t have his lockpick set, but he and Gen hadn’t blindfolded their eyes for hours and practiced for nothing.

When they reached the front, the soldiers ungently pushed him onto the little dais that stood before the judges and then fastened a chain from his shackles to a ring in the floor. Then one of the soldiers turned with a nasty little smile and stuffed a piece of cloth into Jared’s mouth.

“Until it’s your turn,” he said.

Jared cussed at him but not much made it through the gag.

Jared’s uncle stood and the room fell silent.

“People of Aventine!” he called out grandly. “Brethren of the Red faction, rightful rulers of this planet, I have called you here today because we must bring before this esteemed body the greatest case of treason in history.”

Jared screamed behind the gag. The people started whispering again and Jared could hear his name.

His uncle gave him a look full of contempt then he turned back to the people, his face a mask of regret.

“You are right, my brethren. This is Jared, the lost Red Prince. My nephew and the rightful heir to the throne.”

Another wave of murmurs went through the room.

His uncle raised his hands and they fell silent. “Years ago, after news reached me that my sister and her husband had been slaughtered by the Amber filth and I immediately rode out to avenge their deaths, I searched high and low for my nephew. In the end I had no choice but to declare him dead. But like many of you, I always hoped he was alive.”

Oh, he was good. Jared was shaking in his chains. That fucking asshole. Furiously, he forced his hands to calm and work on the lock.

“When the news of our Blue allies reached me that they had found Jared, I was overjoyed,” his uncle continued. “I thought, finally, the Lost Prince returns. But alas, it would have been better had he stayed away.”

The crowd was caught spellbound in silence.

His uncle pointed to a wall where they had erected one of the rare technical screens. It was now filled by a picture of Jared and the sum of 40,000 shims. It was a wanted poster from the Rhashku. Fuck.

“For years, I wondered why our Prince did not return. Was he dead after all? Did he not know his true heritage? But no!” His uncle dramatically pointed a finger at Jared. “You see how the tattoo grew, an unmistakable mark. And he wasn’t dead, no, he was flying around the galaxy with a bunch of misfits, thieving and smuggling and living a life that brings dishonor to our people!”

The crowd erupted in chaos.

Fuck. This was really bad.

Jared looked around the room, catalogued the windows high up, the doors he had come through and on the other side the huge doors leading out to the balcony used for proclamations. If he could get out there and jump…

“There are five different bounties on his head!” his uncle yelled. “He has stolen weapons, treasure, sacred objects. He has no shame, no honor! And do you know why he finally came home?” His uncle made a dramatic pause. “To steal from our allies!”

The crowd’s noise turned angry and Jared could see people shaking their fists at him. Panicked, he looked to the balcony. He would just need to sprint over there… He stopped. There, at the edge, he saw someone crouching behind a statue. Long brown hair in a tangled mess. Dammit. Those idiots. Immense relief flooded him and he vowed to strangle them when he got his hands on them. Then he saw the guards at the balcony entrance turn their heads and Jared knew he needed to do something.

The shackles finally sprung loose and he reached up to pull the gag out of his mouth. The guards sprang up to run towards him but Jared just raised his arm and pointed at his uncle.

“You’re a fucking liar! If anyone here is a traitor, it's you!” Jared shouted, his voice carrying through the hall. All the yelling at his crew in high pressure situations was really paying off.

The crowd fell silent and the guards stopped in shock.

“But where was the lie, nephew?” his uncle asked again, a sardonic smile on his face. “Is that not you?” He pointed to the screen where the different wanted posters were flashing.

“Oh, you didn’t lie about me,” Jared said, “you just lied about yourself.” He turned to the crowd. “You think the Amber faction broke in here and killed my parents? You think I fled the planet on my own, as a five year old? No.” He shook his head and turned back to his uncle. “He killed my parents.”

The crowd gasped.

“I saw it. I saw everything. My parents hid me in a closet and they fought for their lives. Against your men! And then Master Julian took me away to save me because you would have killed me too!”

“Outrageous!” his uncle shouted. “How dare you! You have besmirched our faction enough already, stop sullying us with your lies.”

Fuck. Jared was running out of accusations. But he had to trust his crew. Had to give them time for whatever their plan was.

“No lies!” Jared said. “I admit, I am a thief and a smuggler. I came to Aventine to steal from the Blue faction. Which I admit, was really stupid. I mean coming back here…”

HIs uncle remained silent and Jared saw the curiosity on his face, saw it on all their faces. And Jared wasn't about to ignore such a perfect opportunity to create a distraction...

“Love makes you stupid. The great Kric Eripke said that once. And I was made stupid, by love.”

“Love,” his uncle huffed but everyone was listening with rapt attention. The only thing the people of the Red faction loved almost as much as their honor was a good romance.

“I met a guy,” Jared said, turned to the crowd and smiled self-deprecatingly. “Handsome guy. And a smuggler. The most honorable smuggler in the galaxy. And I stole from him and he stole from me. Then I saved his life and he saved mine. He fought off a great desert beast to protect me from certain death. And somewhere along the way we fell in love.” Jared made a sad face. “But his past is as dark as mine and he didn't want to risk a relationship.”

The crowd gave a collective sigh.

“I was bereft,” Jared declared dramatically, “and I needed something to take my mind off him. This job, it was the only solace from the heart break I suffered. And I didn’t care the mortal danger I’d be in. I didn’t care that my uncle might kill me, as he had slaughtered my parents!”

The crowd murmur agitatedly.

“How dare you!” his uncle yelled, “You are a liar!”

“He is not!” A deep voice thundered through the room.

Fuck.

Slowly, Jared turned. There, in the doorway he’d just come through, stood Jensen.

“No,” his uncle gasped behind him.

Slowly, Jensen walked into the room. He was wearing his usual boots and pants but he had  thrown on a dark green coat, like the ones the warriors of the Green faction wore. In his hand, he held a long, slim, rough-handled staff with a sharpened tip at the end.

“Ackles,” his uncle whispered, voice full of venom and Jared froze.

Jensen. Jensen Ackles. The General’s son, cast out after a betrayal of their honor, only to destroy the Blue faction and then leave the planet.

Jensen. Jensen _was_ a Green warrior, and he—when he’d recognized Jared’s tattoo, recognized his enemy, he’d done nothing. The secret of his past Jared had given him a pass on was the fact that they were mortal enemies. And Jensen had still left him with a kiss.

Jared let out a shaky laugh. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Jensen’s look clearly said he thought it was the other way around.

“Arrest him!” Jared’s uncle yelled shrilly, but no one moved.

A ghost was walking in their midst.

Jensen stopped next to Jared. “Bereft? Really?”

“Shut up,” Jared muttered but he couldn’t keep the stupid grin off his face. “I was being dramatic. To please the crowd.” Then he laughed wildly and pointed at Jensen. “Red brethren, may I present: Jensen Ironheart, the most honorable smuggler in the galaxy!”

“NO!” Jared’s uncle yelled over the muttering crowd. “Arrest him! Kill him!”

Jensen raised his fist with the polearm and the room fell silent. He looked at Jared. “Not today.” He turned to the Red King. “Today, for one last time, I am the ghost of Jensen Jeross Ackles and I have come to take your other eye, David, you lying, murderous traitor!”

The threat to their king finally spurred the Red soldiers out of their trance. But the moment they charged, chaos broke out in the hall. From all sides, Jared and Jensen’s crews stormed the hall, shooting their loud laser guns and yelling profanities.

Jared watched as Jensen drew his arm back and threw his weapon. It sailed through the air in an elegant curve and hit his uncle right in his good eye. He fell to the ground, hands clutching the weapon and Jensen gripped Jared’s arm.

“Come on, we don’t have much time!”

So Jared followed him while around them, smoke bombs and fireworks went off, filling the entire room with biting gray haze.

They ran into several soldiers but Jensen knocked them out ruthlessly. When Jared wasn’t busy staring he punched out a few soldiers of his own.

They finally reached the balcony where Dani was waiting for them. “Come on!” She was holding a rope and they rappelled down into the big courtyard. At the bottom stood Osric. “This way!”

They sprinted across the courtyard and into the arcade lining it. At a tiny door, Misha was standing, his whole furry body vibrating and his ears twitching.

“We are hurrying!” Jensen yelled angrily. “Is that everybody?”

Dani and Osric had followed them. “Only Gen is missing,” Osric said.

Panicked, Jared turned only to see her running across the courtyard. Then from behind her, a group of warriors emerged from the fog and one of them raised their arm.

“No!” Jared yelled and started running towards her.

The warrior jerked his hand and Jared could see the knife flying through the air, disappearing behind Gen’s back and her eyes flew open wide and she stumbled.

Jared caught her before she fell and then the warriors, dressed in blue and led by the commander, circled him.

Gen was still breathing, shivering in his arms, and her beige shirt was red around the knife still sticking out of her back.

“They’re not the ones you really want,” Jensen said calmly behind Jared. “We both know, commander, that you want to take your revenge on me.”

“Ackles,” he snarled. “You dare to walk as a ghost among us?”

“I dare,” Jensen said simply. “Let them go, and you’ll have your opportunity.”

“Agreed.”

Jensen put a hand on Jared’s shoulder. “Get out of here, now.”

Jared glared up at Jensen. He knew what he was doing, the idiot. It hadn’t worked with the Nivonir and it wouldn’t fly now. But first, he needed to bring Gen to safety.

“Sure, Jensen. Whatever you say.”

Jensen shot him one last burning look, then he turned to the commander.

Jared picked up Gen as carefully as he could and carried her back under the arcade. In the door, Dani and Osric were still waiting. Dani’s face was very white when she saw Gen.

“Are the others on the ship?” Jared asked.

Dani nodded. “Give her to me.”

Gently, Jared transferred Gen into Dani’s arms.

“You have your comm piece to call us?” Dani asked. She knew he’d stay with Jensen.

Jared nodded then asked, “How do you know?”

She smiled. “You were never subtle. And I know that the two of you will find a way out of here as soon as Jensen is done destroying that guy over there.”

Jared grinned. “Don’t worry, we will. And it will be so spectacular, no one will follow you.” He plucked the last two smoke bombs hanging from Dani’s belt then he turned back to Jensen.

In the courtyard, Jensen and the commander were already fighting. The commander was wielding his broad, curved blade and Jensen had apparently pulled a flag pole out of the ground. The Blue warriors watched them avidly, cheering on their commander. But Jared had watched Jensen defeat a desert beast with teeth as long as the commander’s blade, so he wasn’t worried.

Jensen wielded the staff like it was nothing, graceful and nimble on his feet, his coat swishing around him and he landed hit after hit on the commander until he finally knocked him to the ground. The Blue warriors stood in shocked silence.

Jared waited for Jensen to kill the commander but he just stepped back.

“Defeated by a ghost,” Jensen said hoarsely. “Think about that, the next time you want to attack the Green faction.”

The Blue warriors roared in anger and Jared threw his last two smoke bombs at them. Behind them a squad of Red warriors had shown up and they were carrying large bows, the arrows already nocked. Jared jumped forward, grabbed Jensen’s hand and dragged him off to the side. “Come on!”

They ran along the arcade, far way from where their crews had left to give them time to bring Gen to the safety of the ship and get her medical attention.

“Misha’s a great doctor,” Jensen panted out as if he had read Jared’s mind. “She’ll be fine.”

“I know,” Jared pressed out between labored breaths. She just had to be. Seeing Gen like that, he couldn’t think about it. So he took a sharp corner and dragged Jensen into the large gardens. “This way.”

Vaguely, Jared remembered the gardens and the stables at the end. Roccas were considered unsuitable to ride but that didn’t mean that it couldn’t be done.

“No,” Jensen said when he saw the stables and realized what Jared wanted. “You’re insane.”

“There’s no other transportation and we need to get out of here before they kill us,” Jared said and jogged along the stalls, looking for the larger animals.

“Fuck,” Jensen said with feeling, then he followed Jared.

Jared took the headgear for two roccas, handed one to Jensen and then opened a door to the stall of the largest one. “Don’t worry, they’re super calm.”

Jensen eyed the roccas suspiciously. Only the Red faction had tamed these six-legged creatures that looked more like an overgrown Grozirian stone beetle with a rectangular head and a three-parted body. Jared patted his rocca which made a high trilling sound and affectionately blinked all of its ten eyes at Jared.

“Just pet them a little, and you’re fine.”

“Sure,” Jensen grumbled, “let’s just pet the monster beetles, they’re adorable.”

Jared smiled and thought he would burst with joy. He hadn’t been able to think about it, had no idea how Jensen was here, but he was here, saving Jared. After everything…

“By the way,” Jared said when he’d swung himself up on his rocca, “we’re gonna talk about how you knew who I was and instead of coming clean flew off to angst in some dark corner of the universe.”

Jensen had managed to get up on his rocca as well, looking supremely uncomfortable and carefully patting its head. “Sure,” he said and gave Jared a flat look. “Right after we talk about how insanely stupid it was of you to come back to Aventine to steal a fucking pair of daggers.”

Jared grinned. “Deal.”

Jensen rolled his eyes.

They rode out into the hills behind the castle. Jared had to use all his strength and concentration to stay in the saddle and Jensen wasn’t doing much better.

“This was a bad idea,” Jensen bit out.

“You have a better one?”

Jensen stayed silent. Jared would fistpump in victory but then he might fall of his rocca so he refrained. When they crested the last hill, they finally overlooked the valley. They would need to cross it to get to a good landing spot where they could meet their ship outside of the range of the ancient guns of the Red faction. But as they scanned the area, they saw a battalion of Red warriors guarding the valley floor.

“Fuck.”

“Shit.”

Jared and Jensen looked at each other.

“We could loop back,” Jared suggested.

“And risk running into the troops chasing us?” Jensen asked. “The only way I see is forward.”

“Down there?” Jared asked.

Jensen shook his head. “Through the forest and then approach the high plateau from the other side.”

Jared closed his eyes to visualize that on the map. He opened his eyes in disbelief. “That’s right through Green territory. Jensen, that’s suicide.”

Jensen raised a pointed eyebrow. “Really?”

Jared made a flailing hand gesture. “Look, I know this was a bad idea but we don’t have to make it worse.”

“They never guarded the forest closely,” Jensen said. “It’s still our best bet.”

“Fine,” Jared bit out. “But you are not dying.”

Jensen gave him a flat look.

“I’m serious,” Jared said. “I've saved you too many times to watch you die now.”

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t have come back to Aventine then.”

“Oh stars, will you ever let that one go?” Jared asked exasperatedly.

“No. No, I will not.”

“Great,” Jared muttered. “But then how about you tell me why the fuck you didn’t tell me you were a Green warrior after you saw my tattoo?”

And with that, Jared pressed his feet into the rocca’s hard sides and they moved forward.

“Because I needed to figure out whether I wanted to kill you or not,” Jensen shot back when he had caught up.

“And?” Jared asked. “Are you done thinking?”

At this point it really was a rhetorical question but Jared still wanted Jensen to say it.

Jensen glared at him. “Yes. But I still want to kill you.”

Jared’s head whipped around. “Are you serious?”

Jensen rolled his eyes. “Jared, I came back to my home planet where my people will kill me on sight to save you from your mad uncle.”

“Yeah, how did that happen by the way?” Jared asked, curiosity taking over. The giddy joy spreading through his body was really more of an afterthought. Ever since Jensen had marched into the great hall in the Red Castle, Jared had known what Jensen’s answer was.

They rode into the dense forest and Jensen busied himself with brushing a few low hanging branches out of the way before he answered

“I went back for you.”

“You did?” Jared asked gleefully.

“Shut up,” Jensen said roughly. “I told you I wasn’t done thinking but as soon as you were gone…”

“Aw, did you miss me?”

“If you’re not quiet, I’m rethinking my answer,” Jensen grumbled.

Jared snapped his jaw shut and mimed zipping it closed.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Jensen asked but he sounded strangely fond.

“I think it’s the adrenaline,” Jared said. His breathing had calmed down and his heart wasn’t hammering in his chest anymore but he felt strangely light. “You know, I came face to face with the man who killed my parents and almost got executed for treason. Plus, I haven’t had a proper meal in like four days.”

Jensen gave him a worried look. “Just a few more hours, then we should be in a place where we can send the signal for the others.”

“Right. Tell me again how that went.”

Jensen sighed. “I wanted to go back to you but the Imp didn’t pick up the message, so I knew you were pulling a job somewhere. I asked around but no one knew anything. Until Rich told me he’d seen you guys get fuel on YZ/873.”

Jared laughed quietly. “You talked to Rich? Oh, you must’ve really missed me.”

“Jared—” Jensen growled

Jared just guided his rocca closer to Jensen’s, leaned over, and kissed him. “I went on a suicide mission because I thought you dumped me. I’m allowed.”

Jensen’s face went from outraged to soft.

“So that’s where we went,” Jensen continued. “When I saw the Imp in the hangar, I thought I’d gotten a second chance. Imagine my surprise when Osric broke down crying in Misha’s fur and Gen socked me in the face and told me it was my fault you were going to die.”

“Gen punched you?” Jared was delighted. “We go way back, you know.”

“So she said,” Jensen said dryly. “She was pretty hedgy when she told me the story, didn't want to give your secret away, but I already knew. But when I realized you’d gone back to Aventine…” Jensen’s hands clenched around the reins.

“It wasn’t their fault,” Jared said quietly. “I talked them into it and I downplayed how dangerous it would be.”

“So I’ve heard,” Jensen said.

Something occurred to Jared then. “But how did you know I was at the Red Castle?”

“The Blue warriors told us,” Jensen said tersely.

“Just like that?” Jared asked skeptically.

Jensen shrugged. “I have a certain reputation. With their commander and a good chunk of their warriors off to the Red Castle, they didn’t put up too much of a fight.”

Jared had a vision of Jensen fighting his way to the Blue stronghold, wielding his staff like a Grizorian death hound brandished its spiked tail when it went for the kill.

“Thank you,” Jared said quietly. He’d seen what the memories of this place had done to Jensen; he didn’t even want to know what this was costing him.

“You’re welcome. Now be quiet and don’t talk until we’re out of the forest.”

Jared  wasn’t sure if the situation was that dangerous already, but he kept his mouth shut anyway.

They rode through the forest in silence. The rocca’s feet barely made any noise so they just needed to avoid the tree branches and the thick underbrush.

Jared tried to keep his eyes on the way in front of them but he couldn’t help but check on Jensen. He was tense, his entire back a stiff line and his knuckles white where he still clutched the reins.

Jared didn’t know how much time had passed. His stomach had started to grumble painfully—Jared hadn’t gotten any food today—and in the absence of the adrenaline the fatigue set in. Suddenly, Jensen raised his fist and reined in his rocca. Jared followed suit and scanned their surroundings. He couldn’t see or hear anything.

Jensen stared slightly to their left and Jared tried to see what he was seeing but there was nothing. Then the wind rustled the leaves and the bushes but one of the thin branches didn’t move.

“I am not here to disrupt the peace,” Jensen said calmly. “As a matter of fact, I am on my way to leave the planet.”

From the bushes, two warriors emerged carrying long polearms.

“We cannot let you pass,” the tall one on the left said.

“Besides,” the short one on the right added, “you already disrupted the peace.” She looked at Jared. “You brought him here?”

Jensen turned to Jared and Jared thought he caught a glimmer of terror in his eyes. And Jared realized, they hadn’t even thought about what would happen if Jensen's people recognized him. They had been so caught up in the fact that the Green faction would kill Jensen, they hadn’t even considered that they were just as likely to execute Jared.

“Well,” Jared said, trying for a light tone, “it seems my reputation precedes me.”

Jensen just shook his head, his lips pressed together in a grim line, and went for the dagger at his belt. But then the trees rustled and they were surrounded by at least twenty warriors.

Purposefully, Jensen rested his hand on the weapon but made no move to draw the dagger. “Let him go and I won’t make any trouble.”

The short warrior who seemed to be the leader, about Jensen’s age with long blond hair, considered this. Jensen’s people probably knew best what he could do.

“No,” she settled on.

Jensen pulled the dagger again. “Alona,” he said slowly, “I don’t want to fight. But I will do everything in my power to get him out of here alive.”

“Is it true then?” Alona asked. “You’re in love?”

At Jensen surprised face, she sighed. “Everybody is telling the story of the smuggler Red Prince who fell in love with the ghost of the Green faction and who may have exposed his uncle’s treason.” Curiously, she looked at Jared. “Is it true?”

Jared nodded. “He had my parents killed because he wanted the throne.”

Alona nodded. “I am not surprised. Slimy Red piece of filth. You did good, Jensen.”

The other warrior stared at her. “Alona!”

But Alona just shrugged. “He took both the Red King’s eyes and who knows if he’ll survive this time. I know he’s come as a ghost to us, but his mother will judge his return, not me or you. And as far as the smuggler prince goes… no one will harm him unless the General says so.”

Jensen paled but didn’t protest when they guided them out of the forest and towards the Erald, the Green faction’s military center.

Jared surveyed the scene and debated whether he could call their crew down here to save them but it was probably way too dangerous for them.

“You know,” Jared said, “I always imagined meeting the in-laws much differently.”

Jensen stared at him, aghast, then he threw his head back and laughed. Great. Now Jensen was losing it too.

They were forced to dismount the roccas as soon as they reached the cíty. Jared gave his a loving pat and the rocca bumped its head against his hip before it was led away by a Green warrior who eyed it speculatively.

Erald was a bare military stronghold, nothing but training grounds, storage sheds and simple barracks to house the warriors. Everyone who’d been training stopped when they arrived and gathered around. It was absolutely quiet.

Finally, the people parted and a tall woman appeared. Jared knew instantly that she was Jensen’s mother. The same dark blond hair, the same startling green eyes. She carried herself flawlessly, the same easy grace and strength that her son displayed in every movement. Her face was expressionless and her eyes slid over Jensen as if he wasn’t there. Jensen bowed his head.

The General’s gaze settled on Jared instead. “The Lost Red Prince returns. What shall we do with you?”

“Nothing,” Jared said. “If you kill me, you play right into my uncle’s hands. Let me go and the threat of my return will forever hang over his head.”

The General pursed her lips. “We shall not sully our hands with your disgrace. You may go.”

Jared didn’t move. She raised her eyebrows. Jared met her gaze. “I would like to leave with Jensen. Your son, you know.”

“Again with the goading...” Jensen muttered quietly.

The General’s gaze hardened. “I don’t have a son. He is dead. I buried him years ago. You travel with his ghost.”

Jensen raised his head and looked at his mother with determination. “The ghost of your son avenged your people. He killed the Blue warriors and he took the traitor’s eye. Today, he returned to take the other one. What more would you want from a ghost?”

Her lips curled in a sneer. “I want nothing from a ghost.”

Jensen swallowed and pushed his chin out. “Then it is good that the ghost of your son lies dead with his bracelets. I am Jensen Ironheart, a smuggler."

His mother turned her head to him and watched him unblinkingly. Jensen stood his ground and stared right back, head held high. Jared wanted nothing more than to take his hand but he knew Jensen needed to do this alone.

“Smuggler,” his mother said with disdain. “You all live in disgrace.”

Jensen didn’t give an inch. “So we do.”

Then a tiny smile played across the General’s lips. “But I have heard of Jensen Ironheart,” she said. “What he did for the children of Takka. You seem honorable. For a smuggler.”

Jensen’s jaw twitched and then a tear rolled down his cheek.

“That story is widely blown out of proportion,” he said and his voice carried only a hint of hoarseness.

“I don’t mourn my son,” his mother said abruptly. “He was never fit for this life. He saw everything on the battlefield but our honor.” His mother inclined her head. “Safe travels, Jensen Ironheart,” she said and then she looked down at his wrists.

She looked at Jared, fixed him with her clear green eyes. “We are honored by those closest to us,” she said, “by those who understand our deeds.” Then she turned around and walked away.

Jensen stood frozen and stared after her. No one in the crowd moved.

Jared shook off his shock and reached down to activate his beacon. It was time to get out of there. He took Jensen’s hand. “Come on, our ride will be here soon.”

Jensen’s hand wrapped around Jared’s but he was slow to turn. He looked back at Alona, then down at her wrists. “Congratulations,” he said. “You will be a worthy general.”

She bowed her head. “Thank you, Jensen. Ironheart,” she added with a smile.

Jared could hear the sound of the Imp coming closer and he pulled on Jensen’s hand. And Jensen followed him out of the stronghold, away from his family and his people.

While they waited for the Imp to land, Jared stepped into Jensen’s space, pressed their foreheads together.

“I love you.”

Jensen tilted his head up and gave him a soft kiss. “I figured,” he said with a crooked smile.

Jared gasped. “You bastard.”

And Jensen laughed, right until Chad threw the ladder down.

 

Back on the Imp, they had to hug everyone. Jared sat with Gen until she opened her eyes and was well enough to cuss him out for being an idiot and he drew her up against his chest and held her until they both stopped laughing and crying.

When he left her room, Dani was waiting to take his place. With a smile, Jared let her pass. He had a good feeling about those two. He found the rest of the crew drinking in the mess. Felicia, Chris, Aldis and Chad were sitting together at the table, engrossed in a discussion about which crew had pulled the bigger scores ever since their rivalry had started. Osric and Misha were lying curled up in each other on a bench, apparently sleeping. Jared had no idea what to think about those two; he’d need to have a talk with Osric.

Jensen was notably absent.

“Not again.” Jared glared. “Where the fuck is he?”

“Where do you think?” Chris asked.

Jared snorted and went to find Jensen on the upper gangway by the big window.

“Good memories?” Jared asked with a lewd smile.

“Your uncle could die,” Jensen said without preamble.

“That’s why you’re angsting?” Jared asked. “Jensen, I’m not mad at you. I’m glad! I mean, the way you took his eye, that was amazing. And if he dies, he gets what he deserves.”

“I know. And you’re the heir to the throne,” Jensen said.

Jared shook his head. “No. Just no. This planet, it’s nothing but war and grief.”

“You could change the fate of the war,” Jensen said. “Restore your family’s honor.”

“Jensen, our planet has always been at war. The people cling to traditions that pit us against each other all the time. And I’m not going to try to fix that.”

“So you’re just leaving?”

Jared nodded. “The only question is what will you do?”

“What I will do?”

Jared stepped forward and took Jensen’s hand. “Come with me. Your crew and mine. Let’s get back out into the galaxy, together.”

“You really want to leave your home, just like that, when you could stay?”

Jared shook his head. “Jensen, this isn’t my home. It never was.”

Jensen looked at him skeptically.

Jared sighed and leaned forwards. “I never knew this place. So I was born here, so what? Home is love and safety and familiarity. Home isn’t a place, Jensen. It’s people. Your honor is with your people.” Jared leaned back. “So who are your people, Jensen? Those people down there, who cast you out just because a plan with good intentions went wrong? Who didn’t even look back when they banished you? Or the people who have your back, who go with you through every adventure, back and forth across the galaxy?”

For the first time since Jared had known him, Jensen’s expression was vulnerable. He walked over to the window and looked outside.

“I have tried to forget that life, those values, for years, and I couldn’t.”

Jared swallowed. Of course.

“And you’re wrong. My honor will always be there, on that planet, burned and forfeit.” Jensen looked at Jared with a determined expression. “But that’s okay. My disgrace there is honor elsewhere.”

“Disgrace?” Jared asked.

For the first time, since Jensen had come to rescue him, Jared saw him smile.

“Well, you heard my mother: all smugglers live in disgrace.”

Jared grinned. “So, Jensen Ironheart. Ready to go back to being the most honorable smuggler in the galaxy?”

Jensen’s answer was a toe-curling kiss.

“Wait. Fuck.” Jared pulled back.

“What now?”

“I didn't get the blades! Ru’Con—she’s gonna hunt us down, fuck, that—why are you grinning?”

“Come one,” Jensen said and took Jared’s hand. He dragged him back to their cabin until they were standing in front of Jared’s giant bed. Jensen reached for a satchel lying next to the bed and pulled out one of the blades. “We picked them up while we were figuring out where you were. The Blue faction didn’t like it but there was nothing they could do.”

“You’re gonna be smug about this forever, aren’t you?” Jared asked.

“Forever,” Jensen said with emphasis.

“Okay,” Jared said and leaned into Jensen again. “I think I can live with that.”

  
  
  


 


	3. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

 

“I cannot believe you’re this fucking stupid!” Jensen shouted on the top of his lungs so Jared would hear him over the pouring rain.

Thunder crashed above them and then a giant bolt of lightning hit a tree just fifty feet behind them.

“Well, no one asked you to come!” Jared yelled back, brushing his wet hair out of his face while sprinting towards the mountain range. “I told you, we could handle this one on our own!”

“Obviously, you can’t!” Jensen followed Jared, chased by rain, thunder and lightning, and oh yeah, the ancient guards of the city. Jensen was pretty sure they were zombies.

“Oh shut up,” Jared yelled and, with a final burst of speed, they reached the entrance to the cave.

Jensen reached for his comm. “Come pick us up.”

“Excuse me,” Jared hissed at him. "This is our job! Chad, come on.”

Jensen’s comm piece crackled. “This is really awkward, guys,” Dani said. “So we’re flipping a coin to decide who’s coming down to get you.”

“Unbelievable,” Jensen muttered.

Jared just glared.

“What the fuck was so important down here anyway?” Jensen asked, trying to hold on to his very justified anger so he wouldn’t be distracted by Jared’s hair curling adorably at his neck and the way his wet shirt clung to his chest.

“Just because you’re being an asshole, I’m not telling you."

“You little shit.”

Suddenly, Jared attacked him with the full force of his two-dimpled smile. “That’s why you love me.”

 

When the 8-15 landed, Jared and Jensen were just zipping up their pants and wiping their hands clean.

“Really? No one wants to see that,” Aldis said.

“Speak for yourself,” Dani said, ogling them.

Jensen growled at her but Jared winked. He was the worst.

 

Up on the Imp, Jensen went to take a shower. The 8-15 was mostly retired these days, parked in Jim’s junkyard. Except for today, when Jared had gone off on one of his crazy jobs without Jensen. It wasn’t that uncommon. Occasionally, when they wanted to pull separate jobs or needed two ships, they’d go get the 8-15, but mostly they had settled themselves on the Imp. Jared and Jensen shared a room anyway, as did Gen and Dani (occasionally joined by Chad, though no one but Gen would admit to that), and Misha refused to sleep anywhere but beside the engine, so Osric had dismantled his bed and then begged Felicia to put it back together in the engine room. She’d raged about security protocols and lack of space, but when Misha had hooted at her with drooping ears, she had given in. These days, she mostly tinkered with weapons and other constructions in her room and left the engine to Chad. Those two just couldn’t work together.

It had taken some shuffling and some fighting, but now everyone had found their space and the days on the Imp were mostly peaceful. They only really fought when they pulled a job and that was mainly just Jared and Jensen butting heads, if Jensen was being honest with himself.

Usually it was harmless, but today, Jared had crossed a line. It wasn’t the first time; about three turns ago he’d also pulled another incredibly risky job without Jensen. Jensen only knew how bad it was because Jared had come back with his whole body black and blue. The little shit hadn’t even wanted him to see, but when Jared had gone two days avoiding sex, Jensen knew something was up.

And now this.

Jensen left the shower, pulled on pants and a henley and then went looking for Jared. He found him with Felicia, crouched over her workstation in the common room.

When they heard him approaching, they hastily covered up whatever was on the table and gave him identical innocent smiles.

“Okay, what the fuck is going on?”

“Nothing,” Felicia said hastily.

“Well, I wouldn’t say nothing,” Jared said with a leer and dragged his eyes up and down Jensen’s body. “There’s a lot that could go on here.”

“Stop flirting,” Jensen said sternly. “I want to know why you keep pulling dangerous jobs without me.”

Jared sighed. “Fine, spoilsport.”

“Now?” Felicia asked.

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” Felicia went to the wall and hit the red button.

The Imp’s alarm started flashing bright red and everyone ran to the mess. Gen and Dani were only half dressed and Misha’s fur looked like someone had dragged a giant comb through it, the hairs standing up in all directions.

“What is it?” Chad shouted, looking around in panic. “Who’s attacking us?”

“No one,” Jared said calmly. “But it’s time.”

“You didn’t need to sound the fucking alarm for that,” Dani grumbled and finished buttoning her vest.

Jensen was watching the proceedings in utter confusion. “Jared…”

Jared turned to him with a serious expression.

“Who’s dying?” Jensen asked immediately. “Have you been searching for a cure? Have you found it? Why the fuck didn’t you tell me? What—”

Jared pressed a finger against his mouth. “No one is dying. We just... we wanted it to be a surprise.”

Relief flooded Jensen and he kissed Jared’s finger. “Don’t scare me like that. Little shit.”

Jared smiled brightly. Then he straightened his shoulders.

“Jensen Ironheart, Captain of the 8-15 and Co-Captain of the Imp, stretch out your hands.”

Jensen froze.

_Present your wrists._

Gently, Jared took his hands and pulled them forward. Then he slowly pushed up Jensen’s sleeves, revealing his bare wrists.

“You’re the best captain we could ask for,” Felicia said.

“The best Co-Captain we could ask for,” Gen added.

“The best partner I could ask for,” Jared finished.

And then Felicia handed him what they’d covered on her table before. Two broad wristbands, worked from dark nocca leather. Stones were glinting in the bands, translucent pearls to be precise, a piece of something caught in each one and a silver yarn—Yorrin yarn—embroidered along the edge.

Jared fastened first one, then the other to his wrists.

Jensen opened his mouth but nothing came out. He cleared his throat. “What is this?”

“One stone for every one of your feats,” Jared said quietly, then began pointing out the stones. “Gulla oil,” Jared pointed at the first drop. “A piece of the cocoon you wrapped me in. The navigation chips we stole from each other. A drop of Traminer wine. A piece of a Sycarian artifact. And, of course, Yorrin yarn.” Jared gave him a small smile. "That’s from me.”

Then one after another, their crew members stepped forward and every one of them pointed out a stone from a job they had pulled together on the other wristband.

Jensen just stared, couldn’t speak, didn’t know how.

“You are honored by those closest to you,” Jared said. “And trust me, Jensen Ironheart, we’ve got a lot to honor.”

Jensen gripped him by the shoulders and pulled him in close, reveled in how Jared just folded himself against Jensen’s shoulder, breathing into the crook of his neck. He closed his eyes and buried his nose in Jared’s hair.

Around them, he could hear their crew celebrating, their happy sounds filling their ship. Their home.

Jensen balled his hands into fists and felt the still familiar shift of leather against his skin.

He was in disgrace, but he was not without honor.

“Thank you.”

He could feel Jared’s smile. “You’re welcome. And just for the record, I win gift giving forever.”

“You little shit. You’re gonna pay for that.”

Jared drew back and grinned at Jensen with mischief glinting in his eyes. “I’m counting on it.”

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr [here](http://ashtraythief.tumblr.com/). My ask box is always open.


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